Woman yelled at me in public toilets

[empee47]

Went to Tesco yesterday and visited the loo. Washed my hands and turned on the hand dryer and another lady started yelling at me that I was upsetting her daughter because of the noise. Daughter looked to be about 3 and was visibly distressed. Had they asked me not to use the dryer until they’d left the sink area and explained why, I wouldn’t have done. Apparently I can’t possibly be a mum myself as everyone knows kids are scared of the noise. Happens that I have 2 kids myself and the noise has never bothered them. It was the aggressive way she was bellowing at me in public that annoyed me and the sense of entitlement that everything had to run her way.

I’d have thought this Op would be one to engage with her thread, given seems very fired up in her Op

i was wrong!

We don't know either way. The point is that some things cannot be 'knocked out' of people.

In a space designed for males if he's able, and in a unisex space if he needs help from a female. Boys over 7 or 8 shouldn't be in women's spaces.

Ableism isn't clever.

Again, it’s not probably ok, it’s absolutely fine, you’d do not bake up arbitrary rules.

Nor is self righteousness

He’s is 5, stop being ridiculous. The PP doesn’t need your approval.

Did you miss the part where I said it's not really an issue now but will be when he's older? 🫣

Agreed.

I'd stick with probably because I have sadly seen questionable behaviour from boys that age in women's spaces, though I appreciate that likely doesn't apply to you.

Exactly! Kid is going to have to get used to loud noises as that’s part of life! The hand dryers are there to be used!

I doubt there are many mothers who would let a 7/8 year old child into a men’s loo on their own, or leave them to fend for themselves outside a women’s space. It’s no it about needing help with toileting, it’s about supervision and keeping them safe.

I always ask before using the hand dryer. Lots of children don't like the noise. Growing up, we didn't have the hand dryers of today, nor did my youngest (27). They are a new thing, at the level they are at. It isn't difficult to check.

Use the unisex facilities then.
I do think in some cases it is about needing support.

I wouldn’t like an 8 year old boy in my gym changing rooms

but I have no issue in toilets. I go in to a cubicle, lock door, do what I need to do, exit cubicle. All he would see is me washing my hands and drying

It’s not “really” an issue! It’s no issue at all.

So, why are you even giving your unrequested opinion, jumping on a PP who has a five year old?

Telling her in a few years time, it would need to change? So what? What does that matter today?

You must’ve been mightily disappointed when she answered he was 5 and not 8, you couldn’t launch into “he shouldn’t be in there” tirade.

MYOB!

DGD now 7 has always been sensitive to the noise of hand dryers in public loos to the extent that when she was really small she would start getting upset before we even went into the loos! She is on a waiting list for assessment for ADHD now so probably explains it. Many a time I have had to put my hands over her ears so that her own hands were free for her to wash them.

This is unlikely to be relevant to pp's son, however some little boys peer under/through gaps in toilet doors (or try to) or generally create mischief if not in cubicle with mum.

That’s not what this thread is about, @Koalafan hss just derailed it and the PPs DS is five anyway.

Eh?

Well go start your own thread or join one of the 24000 other threads on the topic of boys ages in toilets or changing rooms?

No need. I'm holding up my hands. I have no plans to derail further.
You're not the thread police. 🫣

And you’re not the police to decide what age a mother can take her DS into the toilet police. Nor is your opinion of it’s probably ok because you say so!

Honestly, talk about think the rule the decision on optimum age, telling mothers what they must do in a few years.

Anyway, you’ve had enough attention, derailment and posts deleted.

👋

Eh?
You're the one continuing this, and wading in.