Full Bush or Shaven Haven?

[Lardychops]

Been on a work training /away day today.
Largely female dominated professional (children’s social care)
As usual in the down time amidst all the doom n gloom of the days agenda me and colleagues get into the really important, off the record team bonding stuff - OLD, step kids, menopause, weightloss jabs, difficult teens , GcSEs, holidays, moaning about the management etc etc .
Two colleagues got into the subject of pubic hair removal (as you do in market town village hall on a Friday afternoon) as one felt strongly that the act of removing pubic hair is deeply anti- feminist. Fair point I guess.

She got lots of push back from the shaven havens, landing strippers, and trim triangle havers. Only one other person said they are au natural but caveated that with not currently in a relationship nor looking.
She went onto suggest that while for young males this is probably a natural expectation in a partner due to socialisation via pornograpgy, any man of ‘our age’ ( 40s/50s) who wouldn’t be averse to a hairless minge is virtually paedophile adjacent!!
I thought that was a bit strong to be honest.
Did get me thinking though.
I’m completely in the shaven haven camp, personally - Much prefer it. I believe I’m still a feminist though.
I go swimming most mornings and in the open changing room it occurred to me that not seen a full bush in years.

I wonder what age all the removers stop doing it, do old women do it?

I've worked in settings that had plenty of gallows humour and banal conversation, some of which was filthy. Never felt the need to discuss pubic hair in a work setting.

YABU to think everyone has the same body image and sexual preferences. Many many men prefer a full bush on a woman and some of them describe a shaven one as being too young which they are sexually averse to. Nothing wrong with that it's simply their way of describing their preferences or non preferences. Nobody else needs to get offended by it.

Just because you don't see these full bushes at the pool doesn't mean they don't exist. In fact many women change their grooming habits throughout their lives and even seasons.

Newsflash!

Some shave armpits, some don't
Some apply fake nails, some bite theirs
Some thread their eyebrows, some wipe them with a facecloth.
Some have long head of hair, some cut into a style, some are bald
Some wear make up, some don't.
Some women shave panty area, some don't

Our bodies are all different both the parts you can see and the parts you can't

All off here. It’s for me, my husband doesn’t care what I do with it. It feels cleaner and oral/sex is better. But a big fuck no to shaving, the regrowth would be horrendous. I get waxed every few weeks.

This is entirely subjective. Some of us love the look of labias / cocks etc… The idea that only men are visual sexual beings who enjoy looking at genitals is quite naive and un-feminist, IMO.

What is it with people who have to make everything a problem?

I prefer a waxed Brazilian - not because of porn or a man’s preference but because I like the clean fresh feeling.

Your colleague is just trying to justify the fact she likes a hairy beaver! Each to their own, I say.

I've been in a relationship for 12 years so at this point I'm not militant about shaving. If it's not shaven DH doesn't care.
The only time I absolutely make sure it's shaved now is if I'm going to be wearing a swimming costume.

I feel it's a bit harsh to say it's peadophile adjacent.. if someone is a grown adult woman then the sexual partner is not a peadophile, bush or no bush. Also, children can have pubic hair from a relatively young age anyway.

I understand that - I’m in my 40s! But that’s ridiculous! And a feminist we should not be be “imposing” what we think is right. I shave and always have. Don’t do it for my husband do it for myself - as I don’t like it as it makes me feel unclean - specially on my period. Intention matters in feminism there shouldn’t be a blanket “doing this or that is anti-feminism” in my view. Again, in my opinion feminism is about educating all and make them aware but ultimately it’s about women’s choice.

If it helps my mom who is mid 60s still does! My

But ! It’s just much easier to come with a Hollywood. So surely it is feminist to prioritise your own sexual pleasure ?

I take it all off - my preference and have done for years whether single or in a relationship. DH trims his pubic hair.

I hate the argument that I look prepubescent or that DH must be a paedo! No pubic hair doesn’t make a grown woman look like a child FFS.

Also my mum said hers has gone - and did after menopause. Never heard people say we look like an elderly woman!

But we did…?
A strong need to, overwhelming even and we ‘needed’ to have the conversation…

we ‘needed’ to have it to meet our own ‘needy needs’.

xx

I'm glad I've never worked in a team like yours.

God no,
I don’t think you’d last long x

I’m 68. Have always used scissors to tidy the sides before wearing a swimsuit. My ex-H wanted the whole lot removed and when he noticed any regrowth he’d have to remind me that I needed to shave. He also shaved his undercarriage. I hated being expected to look like a child, especially as he knew I’d been sexually abused by an elderly relative when I was 4-5. I hated his shaved genitals, though he expected me to prefer oral without the fluff. He did like porn mags and videos (we split up before the internet).

My last relationship was 20 years ago, he said he’d only slept with one woman who’d removed it all, back in his student days, and it repulsed him that she looked infantile.

In hospital 15 years ago after cancer surgery, and having bedpans and enemas and bed baths, I asked the nurses what range of hair removal they saw. They both said they’d never seen a patient who removed it all. Yet my DDs in their 30s have removed all theirs since their teens, through multiple relationships, and I think it’s awful.

ETA after chemotherapy mine thinned dramatically and has never fully recovered, but nobody but medical professionals will ever see it.

No. I'd have left. I'm not keen on all women teams and especially ones like that.

Wouldn’t want them on my wall 😄

Nor me I don’t think!!!
x

As far as I’m concerned, anyone who is complaining about the state of my public hair is welcome to never see it again.

With all the porn so easily available, are their really men masturbating over short text exchanges of people saying if they wax, shave or otherwise?

That’s the unbidden thought that flashes into my head. What do you want me to do about it?

I like a little bit of armpit hair, but once it’s long enough that you could actually comb it if you wanted to, it traps sweat and deodorant can’t even get to the surface of the skin.

I like body hair on men too - if I didn’t, marrying my husband would have been a really bad idea. 😄 But he could definitely use some trimming from time to time.

Because otherwise it traps sweat, and deodorant can’t even reach the surface of a person’s skin.

I haven't had any pubic hair since approximately 2002. I’ve no need for it, think it looks terrible, feel much cleaner without it, especially during my period, no pubic hair (both me and my partner) fits in to the type of sex we enjoy, and no, no man has ever ‘coerced’ me to into doing so.

The comments about it being odd and akin to a pre-pubescent girl are hilarious! I can assure you, I don’t look like like a pre-teen girl - you know I don’t so why use that as an argument?!