To have not shared the chips?

[TommyAndGinaAreHalfWayThere]

We went to see a band last night and I drove as I don’t drink. On the way back we stopped off to get a takeaway. Just kebab and chips. As soon as we got back in car with takeaway DP opens the chips and starts scoffing them. I kept saying “can you at least wait until we get home?? We’re 5 minutes away!” And he said “I’m only having a few”.

By time we got home only half bag of chips remained (probably even less) so I put them all on my plate and just put a kebab on his.

He inevitably reacted with shock and horror asking where his chips were so I said “in your stomach”. He insisted he’d only had a couple, more than half of the bag was gone. He “demanded” that I share the chips, I refused. He went in a mood.

He does this all the time, can’t possibly wait 5 minutes until we get home, has to start eating immediately whilst I’m driving. Normally I share what’s left but after repeatedly asking him to stop, I refused this time. He said I was being petty. I said he’d rude to start tucking into a shared meal before I can join in. Who is right?

He does the same with popcorn at the cinema, huge handfuls so now I buy separate. Even then he has the cheek to start digging into mine when his is empty.

You did share - he ate his share on the way home.
The greediness is very unattractive because it’s selfishness.

Wanting to have a greedy big occasional special treat blow-out isn't a problem.

Being unable to resist the urge to start scoffing food in the car isn't that bad - although it's not nice if the driver has to wait before being able to do the same.

The problem is expecting to take somebody else's food as your automatic right, and making them go without.

If you want lots of food, you make sure that you buy lots of food for you, as well as the full amount of food that the other person/people eating with you want for themselves. You don't just assume that yours is yours but theirs is also potentially yours too.

Am I the only one thinking it rather sad that instead of chatting about how much they enjoyed the gig, OP and her DP are instead bickering about chips? Or maybe it was a shit gig, or one of them was only there to keep the other company (never a good idea ime). Either way it's not great.

Totally my thought. If he eats all your chips buy one each. Problem solved.

He's clearly fixated on food. Buy more food next time knowing he is a greedy guts. I lived with one. Open a packet of crisps, didn't want a packet to himself but helped himself to at least half a packet of mine.

This reminds me of a thread from years back by a poster whose DP sounded just like yours. Almost identical scenario - he went to make a sandwich in her kitchen and asked if she wanted one too, she said yes but guess what? Greedy bastard just made one massive sandwich for himself, using up the whole pack. I seem to remember the final straw was when they got a takeaway together, he asked for a ‘taste’ of hers and proceeded to scrape about half her meal onto his plate.

Seriously, OP, his behaviour is something you’d expect from an (ill-mannered) teenage boy, not a fully grown man. Does he have form for being this self-absorbed generally, or is this specifically a food thing?

Of course you're not. That's the whole issue, that his greediness is spoiling the relationship so OP can't just enjoy a night out with him. He does it at the cinema too.

Not - gasp! - a whole post?! 😱😱

Jesus, the OP did a bit of typing. She didn’t have a contract taken out on him!

Buy an extra portion of chips?

but honestly it is a thought....

It would be the use of the word ' home ' that would make us think you live together.
I suppose if you had said ' back to mine ' or ' back to yours ' it would be read differently.

solution, you each have a kebab and chips in the future.

apart from that

what is it that attracts you to him as greed isn't usually attractive

If you’ve deteriorated to fighting over food, then have a look at how your life is this bad. Seriously it’s embarrassing. Rather split up if it’s stooped to this level.

Exactly. Everyone bar my DS shares. He has his own food as its the only thing he eats. Yet the rest of my family think this makes him greedy or selfish.

Personally I love sharing takeaways s you can have more variety than everyone ordering 1 dish just for them. But only if others are also happy to share.

Surely it's clear that OP is "worked up" over a whole course of conduct involving greed, selfishness and immaturity - not a few chips?

Yes, this sounds like just a slightly different version of "She left me because I left a dirty cup on the side".

Why didn't you each buy a bag of chips. How do you know how full the bag was to work out half.

@TommyAndGinaAreHalfWayThere he should not eat while your driving home and he definitely shouldn’t be expecting half of the ones left for you .
Stick to your guns he sounds selfish he needs to learn life isn’t just about him.

Sounds like he would still want half of op’s or even more

I’d find this repulsive.

People who are greedy with food are so irritating. I would also be angry.

Do you want chips?
No.

ok
but large portion cos you know the smell of chips are lovely

I really want a kebab and chips now

Most people have a fair idea what a portion of chips looks like.

Personally I love sharing takeaways s you can have more variety than everyone ordering 1 dish just for them.

Me too.

It might stem back to when I was (a lot!) younger & a takeaway was a rare treat so you made the most of as many different tastes as possible!

ewww, he sounds greedy, this would give me the ick

This would piss me off, my ex was like this a greedy moody man child... tell him straight wait to eat together or go and sulk.

Yes, it is. Largely, anyway. I am an only child and I'm good with sharing food and material things. To be fair, I'm not good with sharing attention, I have to be the centre of attention in my friend groups (I am very funny and sarcastic and charismatic, so I don't come across as desperate for attention: I'm good at making sure it stays on me without being overtly needy about it)