To be put off a man because he was asleep during the day?

[PeptoDismal]

Been on a few dates with a bloke. He sent me a message yesterday at 2pm asking what I was upto, I returned the question and he said “I’ve just woke up lol”. At 2pm?? He’d been up in the day earlier as he’d messaged me at 10am saying he was off to shop. How lazy - don’t get me wrong I’m not bursting with energy either but I at least stay awake during the day. It’s really put me off

People are different. Some people are programmed to need a nap. There's actually research that suggests these people die earlier if they live lives that means they don't get naps.

I think many people would benefit from an afternoon nap. Post lunch slump is a commonly experienced thing.

My personal bug bear are people who think everyone must be like them, and those who aren't have something wrong with them. I'd much rather date a nap-taker than someone like that. An afternoon nap snuggled up together is a thing of beauty.😁

I nap almost every day! As well as working full time and living a busy, active life.
I’m not a great sleeper at night, probably average 6 hours, and I work from home. Most afternoons the ‘fog’ comes down and I’ll take a 15-20 minute nap break. I’m far more productive when I wake up than pre nap.

Is it a moral failing to nap if overall you still sleep less gah the average person? 🤣

It’s too late now op, but if this is something you find offputting; why didn’t you send him a leading follow up message like “hope you are not unwell?”.

None of us know on here if he is a slacker or not!

But it would put me off too so I get where you are coming from!

Lots of questions haha, was it his day off? Was he just having a nap? Hungover from a wild one the night before? Does he work shifts?

I absolutely love a nap on my non-working day, only bloody rest I get all week.

Love an afternoon power nap

Don't move to Italy, we're all asleep at that time, even when we're driving.

It would depend on the rest of his lifestyle. An afternoon nap when he’s meant to be WFH at a 9-5 desk job would put me off….a nap becuase he’s a shift worker and it’s his day off is completely different.

If I got 6 hours sleep a night I'd be like the energiser bunny on speed!! I can but dream.

However, if you get a boost from your power nap, go for it!! I would if I could but I can't choose to nap either, I'll just lie there awake. 🙄🙄🙄.

Does he work?

YABU. some people nap. My partner naps, I don't. It's fine.

If I end up falling asleep in the day, I end up feeling like absolute rubbish... So even if I am sleepy during the day, I force myself to stay awake to avoid nasty naps. My partner on the other hand is refreshed by naps, so just goes off for a kip for an hour and then feels much better afterwards. It's like magic and I wish I could do it.

This.

My husband naps and it makes me rage every time but I say nothing.

If you are a nap hater probably best not to see him again!

I did ask him if he was unwell, he replied “no why?” So I said “being asleep at 2pm, I thought maybe you were unwell” so he said “no just knackered lol”. He works part time.

Same! No matter what time I go to bed or wake up I never get more than 6 or so hours so I eat my lunch quickly while working and use my lunch break for a mid day nap (i wfh luckily). I absolutely wouldn't function without my daily nap and thinks it crazy that some people see it as a moral failing just because its different to them.

I love a nap, rarely happens but when I do it's because I need it. It's not laziness if he's tired. We don't all have the same sleeping patterns. I might think someone has lazy for spending all day every day in bed for no reason but a nap is just a nap.

I'm not having a go at you specifically but sometimes people are mentally tired from a "desk.job " it's not lazy to want to turn off and rest/nap for half an hour it can recharge them.

Omg, I love a nap. Sunday afternoon, 3pm in bed radio 4 if I'm lucky I'll wake up at 7pm to do dinner. Sometimes it might be Monday morning 😞 judgy much

How old are you both?

I’d be massively put off a fully grown adult beyond say, 21, who uses “lol” 🤢

What wrong with a daytime nap?!
Maybe he didn’t sleep well or was feeling under the weather? Does he do shift work?
How old are you? Lots of older people take a daytime nap because they tend to sleep less at night or just generally have less energy

I’m just getting back into bed at 9am. I’m so chuffing happy. After a scroll I’ll probably get a lovely hours nap and if anyone thinks I’m lazy I couldn’t care less. I’m tired and want to nap. You sound annoying

Grow up! OP has every right to be put off a childish bloke who stays up late enough to sleep in until 2pm like a teenager! Yuck

The grammar and the lol would put me off more than the nap ...

It would be all the lolling that put me off, not the nap.

I would avoid and I’m speaking as someone who’s DH takes any opportunity to to go to bed. It’s annoying and spoils weekends.

one minute he’s gone upstairs to do something and then I’ll come up a couple of hours later and curtains and closed, he’s been in bed the whole time. This isn’t such an issue on week days because hey he’s supposed to be working and if his manager hasn’t a clue then not my problem. But at weekends if we’ve made plans these have been cancelled so many times because he’s in bed. (For context my dh has a very relaxed working from home job)