To be put off a man because he was asleep during the day?

[PeptoDismal]

Been on a few dates with a bloke. He sent me a message yesterday at 2pm asking what I was upto, I returned the question and he said “I’ve just woke up lol”. At 2pm?? He’d been up in the day earlier as he’d messaged me at 10am saying he was off to shop. How lazy - don’t get me wrong I’m not bursting with energy either but I at least stay awake during the day. It’s really put me off

My body naturally needs naps. It just doesn't like getting a 'full' night's sleep. I need a nap during the day, I can go without one! But naturally that is just how I work.

I'm about to have one now. I'm not lazy, I didn't sleep until 02:00 (was in bed a long time before falling asleep) and was awake again at 07:00. I've ran errands, walked my dog, been to the shops, and after having an hour of sleep I'll start on my work.

But if you can envision it never working for you with someone who likes or needs a nap, then I guess that's fair enough. You just sound quite closed-minded.

Christ, a nap sounds like absolute nectar.
I envy those who are able to have them.

Similar, worked 7 full days straight earlier this month but on my long awaited day off, I had big plans but I ended up falling asleep just before lunchtime, kipped an hour or so and then bed at 8 that evening and slept right through till 5, I needed to catch up.

Maybe that’s why they’re healthy.

I work part time and I’m always knackered. I have adhd, 3 children and two dogs. I’m permanently tired. Some people need more sleep, it’s not a red flag, stop being ridiculous.

I think my ADHD is precisely what makes it so hard to imagine sleeping in the daytime...I find it hard enough to sleep at night let alone the daytime 😂

I've always felt horrible after sleeping any time other than night time, groggy and confused as to what day it is.

I can't get too worked up about this. I love a siesta me.

My mum is up at 4:30am for work. She has a nap later on so she can function.

Maybe try it before you judge.

I don't do it very often but it's soo nice if it's been a slightly sleep deprived week.

This made me really laugh.
Op have you really never had an afternoon nap, they’re the best.
You really should try it, you’re missing out.

Nothing beats a nap ! Especially as I'm awake from 4am onwards

Well yes, getting up at 0430 is in very legitimate nap territory. There seemed to be lots of people on here without horrible early starts who nap.

And it wasn’t a judgement, more surprise as I don’t know anyone who naps, unless they keep very quiet about it!

As I said above, my surprise may also stem from how hard I find it to sleep full stop. I’d actually love to be able to sleep when convenient and wake up refreshed.

I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone about the times I nap. Hardly scintillating conversation! So you may know plenty of people who nap.

The fact that people think this is a normal thing to ask speaks of the climate here. There are some circles where asking this would have you ousted from that company just because you're obviously a very unhealthy person.

Exactly.

Yeah, I don't mean times obviously. But if it were that common I'd expect to have heard at least one friend say "ah I just had a great nap" or "sorry, just woken up" or "just the usual, did some work, had a nap etc" in response to chit chat about what they'd been up to that day.

But since the time of hang overs I haven't heard it come up bar in times of illness.

Well I’m purely a sample of one but I often nap (disabled child who doesn’t sleep!) and I can’t recall ever mentioning it to my friends.

You’re incompatible. I think it’s probably best for both of you if you move on.

I also think that if you’re dating with a view to finding a ltr, you might want to think about whether there’s anything you’d be willing to compromise on for a financially responsible, loyal, honest, good man who pulls his weight in all areas.

As an aside, I love a nap. I’m planning on having a quick 40 winks later this afternoon.

I remember reading that people who nap in the afternoon die sooner.

May or may not be true, of course, but it stuck with me.

Relatively recent article about research showing the benefits of taking a nap.

It never ceases to amaze the dumb things people consider off putting these days... so he had a nap, big deal. Maybe he had trouble sleeping the night before? Who knows. You're probably the sort of person who also considers 'doesn't like coffee' or 'is shorter than 6ft' as 'red flags'... rather than actual 'red flags' like doesn't want a job, or punches me when he comes home from the pub.

I suspect that could be because the afternoon naps are necessary due to health issues, and it’s those health issues people die from, rather than the naps per se.

I suspect people don’t mention it for the very reason in the o/p- fear they’ll be judged as lazy.

friend of mine quite often will get sarky comments if she mentions she’s just woken up at 2pm- she works nights!

Have you never been to Spain?

or any other country which has siesta? It’s very common in countries where it gets hot in the afternoon.