To be put off a man because he was asleep during the day?

[PeptoDismal]

Been on a few dates with a bloke. He sent me a message yesterday at 2pm asking what I was upto, I returned the question and he said “I’ve just woke up lol”. At 2pm?? He’d been up in the day earlier as he’d messaged me at 10am saying he was off to shop. How lazy - don’t get me wrong I’m not bursting with energy either but I at least stay awake during the day. It’s really put me off

To be fair, we are tiptoeing so as not to wake you 😉

Reading through these posts I have come to the conclusion that nappers seem a much nicer, friendlier bunch.

Whoa - i was replying to the poster who said they had to nap after a heavy meal, that's not something everyone experiences

How do you know though? He may have done a fair bit of DYI earlier, gone for a long run/ bike ride or something physically tiring. Just because he replied with couple of words to OP doesn’t mean you or her have the whole picture. However if he was up all night gaming, I’d be completely turned off.
anyway, Op I’m peri and my sleep is really bad at night; regular naps are a must for me.

Napping is good for you. There are even sleep pods for people to nap at work.
https://podtime.co.uk/ultra-pod/

That was me. It was a generic query about people getting sleepy after a Christmas/roast dinner and you suggested to me to eat less.

As I said the nappers seem a nicer bunch.

I will be telling someone like you to fuck off as I absolutely LOVE my naps

Also, don't be with someone when you have mismatched energy. I had an XP who would get up at weekends, walk the dog, go back to bed. Get up, have breakfast then fall asleep over his laptop, have lunch and walk the dog and then nod off in front of the TV all afternoon. He COULD stay awake, if we were on holiday or doing something, but it made for a very boring weekend when we were together because there were no conversations - he was asleep all the time!

Dying 😂😂😂😂😂

Maybe all the non-nappers are judgemental and snappy because they're not getting enough sleep 😏

I love an afternoon nap. Obviously I can't at work, but my work productivity would probably be better if I could. Different people, different sleep patterns and energy levels. Just based on his text style though I wouldn't personally be attracted to him though.

Agree.

None of us know INCLUDING OP what he was doing.

OP says he told her he went to shop. No idea where he went, what he shopped for, how long it took him, or how long he napped for. Also, don’t know if he left on time to go shopping.

It’s stupid to call someone lazy based on very little information.

OP should just tell him she is not interested if she is already making assumptions of laziness because he dare take a nap during the day.

YANBU if it was his working day. Doesn’t he have a job?

The competitive teeny-tiny threads are thataway. ——>

My husband started napping every lunch time since his 50s... can't say he is lazy as he still work full time from home and the main breadwinner! I think it can have impact to a young family though, our kids are 11+ now so they can find their own entertainment if we are "not available".

Probably a put off for me too if he is in his 20s, 30s and nap regularly, could be a sign of health problems.... but I won't judge, I used to nap Saturdays to catch up my sleeps from weekdays work in my 20s.

I am not sure how having a nap can mean someone is lazy. If you are tired, you need to sleep.
If he has time for a nap, and it is not getting in the way of everything else, then I don't see what the problem is.

Ah, but this is MN, land of the competitive sleep deprivation warriors…

What’s wrong with a nap?

DH naps most days when he gets home from work (he works approx 55hrs a week).
I don’t nap very often but sometimes it’s just needed, I napped today when I got home from work (hideous day) as I needed the energy to go to the gym.

There could be plenty of reasons for him to be asleep and waking at 2pm. He could've been up since 3am and was tired. You don't say how long he was asleep for. If he went shopping at 10am he clearly hasn't slept all day until 2pm. My ex husband used to sleep during the day and that was pure laziness to be honest he worked a 6hour shift from 1am until 7am maybe 3 days a week he'd come home and sleep until 5pm wake up eat and go back to bed at 7pm. On his days off work he'd spend most of the day asleep

I had a siesta for years. I lived in Yorkshire. Sometimes I have a quick afternoon snooze at the weekends.
Maybe your chap was doing the Power Nap thing.

I always use the word ‘ lol ‘ & I consider myself smart enough with good English 😁
Maybe that’s why my dates are never a success
My bad grammar 😆

Its you. Hi, you're the problem, it's you.

I’d dump him for his crap grammar.

Just seen this op … well in that case… I must admit I wouldn’t find that terribly attractive.

That may be hyper-critical and judgemental, but if he is under sixty, in good health, doesn’t have small children and isn’t dealing with broken nights, and he only works pt, I would find it slightly bewildering tbh as to why he would need a nap?

It doesn’t bode well for him if he had small dc to deal with for example, if he is exhausted now!

However he was up earlier in the day so maybe he had a very early start for some reason? Some people need more sleep than others. And at least he sounds honest!

I think you need to make a judgement about him based on a broader context op, Does he seem productive with a good work ethic? Does he have self discipline? Does he manage his time well? Is he a self starter? You need more time to find these things out.

If you are looking for your life partner, and ultimately someone with whom you want to have children and build a life; all of those things suddenly become quite important when you start your maternity leave!

I think you’re over reacting, I often have an afternoon nap if I’ve had a bad night especially.