Renting my property to husband’s ex

[literati]

Name change for this post as some details are quite outing. For context My husband and I have been married for 8 years, I have one daughter from my first marriage and he has two daughters with his ex wife, all kids are early to mid teens, my DD lives with us 12/14 nights and my step DDs are with us 50/50. Our blended family works really well, the girls are very close, go to the same school and have mutual friends. Co-parenting with our respective ex’s is pretty amicable and we all live within 15 minutes of each other.

Now on to my dilemma, after dropping the girls off to his ex wife’s house, the girls Mum has told him that her landlord has given her notice to quit her lease and she is really struggling to find somewhere to rent that she can afford. She is single and working full time in a relatively low paid role so I totally get that it is really tough for her. My husband pays her maintenance weekly at £200 pw even though we have 50/50 care as he earns much more than her, no issue with this. I own a rental property in our town which I purchased before I met my husband there is no mortgage on it. My husband has asked if I would rent it to her for below market rent to help her out. Property is currently being let out but lease ends in September. On one hand I totally understand why he wants to help her the girls need a stable home and there is a housing crisis, on the other I am nervous to get involved in business/ finances with his ex, seems a bit too entangled. Wwyd in this situation?

How exactly do you find a reputable tenant? MN is full of horror stories where the tenant isn't known to the LL.

The OP/DP can and has seen where the ex lives now and will have a good idea of how she looks after the current rental, you wont get that with a random.

Eviction is possibly years away and can be messy whoever the tenant is.

The worst evictions are when the tenant trashes the house/refuses to leave/pays no rent..

Unlikely in this case.

How much rent are you charging? If it's £200 a week suggest a rental agreement with your husband and he pays it to you directly see how he feels about that idea

@literati is the ex aware that you own a rental?? why does dh think it is ok to make the current tenants homeless to put his ex in instead?? do you think your dh has mentioned to her about your flat?? I think it is a bit off!

OP has said lease runs out for her current tenants in September, I’m guessing they will want to renew tenancy unless they have plans to move.

If someone hasn’t already one option could be rent it through a management company to create a separation and a formal contract.

Honestly, I would. If she can’t get a rental, they could end up in a homeless hostel. I know someone this happened to. I can’t imagine how I would feel as a child living in an affluent house half the week, and a hostel the other half. Is she a good tenant now? Any reason she might cause you trouble? I’d do it for the SC.

Has the tenants @literati indicated they want to move? Or do they want to sign a new lease?

You are right not to do this, it has disaster written all over it.

As an aside, why is the ex earning so little when your DH earns so much more? Was she a SAHM when they were married whilst he worked? If yes, it’s her being a SAHM that would allowed him to increase his earning potential. Did they not own a house when they were married?

Jesus, there's some bizarre advice on here. People are way too quick to judge. OP, you sound thoroughly decent, and so does your DH. You've been lucky with inheritance which has afforded you the life you live, which you readily acknowledge. Others are not so fortunate. I guess what you need to weigh up is the hassle/upheaval/fallout from the ex and her child having to move much further out and the longer term impact this will have on your blended family.

I know we live in a completely selfish world but it doesn't have to be like that. If it were me, I'd be looking to help out somehow because there are children involved who all get on and are related one way or another and its the right thing to do.

You do full and thorough referencing, you buy landlord insurance and you require a guarantee.

I'm confused. They were married with two children, so a fairly long marriage. There is a big difference in income how did she end up with so little after the divorce that she now has to rent? Is your DHs high paid job recent?

Ah cross post. I'm also wondered about this. The disparity must in some part be because of op but even so.

I agree DH being a guarantor or buying a house in his own name (a good idea anyway if he is only a minority owner of his current home.)

The issue you have now is the genie is out of the bottle. Your DH cannot take back that he’s asked you so if you say no, it’s going to have an impact. If your DSC find out you refused to help, it’s going to have an impact.

Personally I would do it because it would help the DSC and it sounds like you have the kind of relationship where you can sit down beforehand with the ex and iron out any potential issues before they happen. But that’s just me.

You're a blended family, and this is the mother of your step kids. You otherwise have no issues.

I would rent to her, it's a no brainer.

Anyone can fall on hard times, and I'm sure she's embarrassed to have to accept help from you. Renting to her is the right thing to do.

Good luck with that!

LL's rarely give a bad reference, as they want their existing tenant to move out....

Ins covers the costs, subject to limits and excesses but doesn't cover the emotional stress.

Deposits are limited.

If she is reliable, I’d do it. Women should support other women as long as it doesn’t leave you at all legally or financially vulnerable.

DON’T DO IT!
Everything is working well right now. You will risk all of that by getting involved so intimately in her life. All you need is a minor change in circumstances (she meets a new partner, changes job, becomes ill etc) and it could all go tits up.
Much better to let your property to someone else and give her extra financial support to rent somewhere else herself.

Good luck! x

I would not do this, it’s too emotionally complicated and tricky enough being a landlord now without the extra stress for you all. See if you can help in some other way. Perhaps take over one of her DC’s expenses to free up more oh her money for rent.

I think DH should buy a property for them to live in until the youngest is 18. No cost. No more CMS.

it’s not like he’s got his own mortgage. He can afford it. (Maybe cheaper area? )

Before any other consideration I'd be finding out if my tenant whose home it currently is, wants to renew the agreement or if they're looking to move in Sept.

But in all honesty I think it's a really bad idea for all the reasons already mentioned.

it's already showing his true colours, that he thinks his ex wife & children should benefit at your daughter's expense.

given all he has thought about in the past I don't imagine he doesn't realise that. You are comfortable due to your inheritance, she's already hugely benefitting as he's giving he'd £800 a month that he probably couldn't if he was paying rent/mortgage, now he wants you/DD to lose out on her university fund etc to subsidise his EX wife.

then there's all the complications others have already mentioned re LK/tenant & what happens in various situations during tenancy & financially when the girls reach 18.

i really don't think it's a good idea!!

It’s a tough dilemma.

On paper, it looks like an awful idea. Ex wife moving into new wife’s property. If the relationship is good then it’s not so bad but if it’s not then I wouldn’t consider it. You say it’s amicable which is a positive and I can see why your DH has suggested this so that his DC have accommodation to live in.

Could your DH mention that if that you rent the property to his ex then the maintenance payments are reduced to compensate. I’m guessing as you are married your finances are joint so this would still have a positive impact. I would have this agreement in writing separate to the tenancy agreement.

I would be looking to issue a tenancy agreement on a 6 month basis and review meaning that if there are issues or you need to sell then it’s easier.

I would absolutely 100% though insist that there is a guarantor that is NOT your husband.

I have to admit @literati if the tenants are moving out, even though my advice is no, I’d check references with her current landlord and rent it out to her but it would be at full amount. I’d get H to pay any shortfalls in the amount of rent.
The dilemma is, H has asked you and if ex and SC have to move further away to find a rented property ‘You’ are going to be resented. Are you expected to (if current tenants want to stay) to pay out to evict them? It could cost you many thousands to take current tenants to court as they might dig their heels in if they could potentially be made homeless.

If tenants want lease to be renewed, would your H want his ex to move in with you? To help her out? Or for you to build a granny annexe?

OP in addition to the other points on here about the dynamic it would create, it isn't as clear cut whether she could actually get UC housing element paid to rent from you. Its been a while since I worked processing housing benefit claims, but contrary to popular belief it isn't as simple as 'is the tenant related to the landlord' but 'is this a business arrangement'.
To be classed as a business arrangement and therefore eligible for support with rent, the benefits office have to be confident that you would do things like charge a reasonable rent, take action on rent arrears, and that you would, if necessary, follow an eviction process and seek a new tenant, eg over non payment. That's what we used to consider as a business arrangement compared to a non essential/family arrangement.

It would be hard to prove that were the case if your husband's dependent children were living in the property and if you had previously rented it for a higher amount (the drop in rent suggesting that it's becoming more of a favour than a business contract, that you're not reliant on the rental income)

Yes, quite true. But at the end of the day, OP has an apparently good Tennant in property already who presumably pays rent on time. Why evict them to take on a risky Tennant & risk jeopardising the seemingly good dynamic between all the parents.

When they were married both ex and DH were low income earners, they were only married for three years together for five. They rented and there weren’t any assets to split when they divorced. Since then my husband has changed careers and become self employed, he is earning much more now but I still out earn him by almost double working in a professional role.

The proposed discount on rent would be in the region of £500 pcm as my property is larger and detached in a more central location than her current home. But yes when the SC have left school and the UC stops I’m not sure what she will do she certainly won’t be able to pay even the discounted rent as it will be nearly all her wage. This is what worries me, I’m solving todays problem but creating a bigger one down the line.

I don’t want her and the SC to end up in a BnB but equally I’m not moving her in to my house or building a granny flat in my garden for her as another poster suggested. My SC do not know anything about the housing issues so aren’t going to resent me I hope. We have a nice relationship and the girls are lovely and polite and always grateful, they don’t know the intricacies of my finances but are aware that I am financially comfortable and I assume the ex does too.