To ask what you'd think of a 20+ stone woman lying on beach?

[PinataHeeHaw]

I'm alone on a uk beach, taking in the sun.

Will people likely be thinking the old beached whale thing?

I'd think good for you!

going to be honest, I always wonder why people do this to themselves. I wouldn't give it a second thought though to the fact that you are sunbathing.

Honestly? Anytime I see someone bigger than me on the beach in swimwear I tend to think, “she looks good! Maybe i could do that and it wouldn’t be that bad…”

As a larger woman myself, I’d be massively impressed you were able to get down! My knees wouldn’t allow it.

IF I noticed your size at all (and I most likely wouldn’t) my inner monologue would go something like this:

”That’s a large lady over there. She looks like she’s having a good time though. It’s great she doesn’t feel like she has to cover up. I often feel like I have to cover up. Urgh I hate my arms. I wonder if I looked silly in that cardigan yesterday. Cardigans aren’t really ‘in’ at the moment. Were they ever ‘in’? I think in the 2010s they were. God I love cosy winter clothes. What shall I wear this summer? I need to go shopping…”

In other words, it would take about 1.5 seconds for my thoughts about you to turn into thoughts about me and my own life.

I don’t think I’m especially self-absorbed, people are just like this! Hope you enjoyed your afternoon at the beach x

I’d be thinking, “good for her!” and wishing that I felt warm enough to be lying on a beach in the UK!

Absolutely not, everyone has their insecurities but we are our own biggest critics. Life is too short to not enjoy it. ❤️

If they mind they don’t matter; if they matter they don’t mind.

Enjoy the wave noise mmmmmmmmmm.

Thank you everyone.

I'm so sorry to those of you who have had nasty comments off of strangers. People can be so horrible sometimes!

I had a wonderful day sunbathing and doing very little else. I did wear suncream after coming out in an itchy rash after sun exposure numerous times this summer! The suncream has kept that at bay nicely.

I felt like I was on the beach somewhere abroad!

I only got bothered by a little dog who came up to me barking it's little head off. I found it very amusing.

It's given me the confidence to perhaps enjoy beaches alone more often, especially when abroad, where I'm terrified I'll get nasty comments!

It's the getting up that was the issue! In sand that doesn't like me standing up too. Then the fishermen and the boat crew might very been looking. I did ok though, I might have flashed my knickers, but I did ok!

Funnily enough, I was walking on the beach earlier and there was a larger lady - much bigger than 20 stone - lying in a swimsuit and little shorts. The only thought that crossed my mind was "it would be lovely to be that confident and carefree". I'm a size 12 and wouldn't dare. Isn't it sad that the fear of the judgement of others stops us doing stuff we would love.

I hope you had a lovely judgement free day.

I might wonder if you an get yourself up ok because my elderly parents couldn't do that by selves (nowhere near 20 stone each).

It's just a mechanics curiousity thing, you're presumably very strong enough. Enjoy.

Love it 😆 🤣 😂 😹

Obviously I forgot to mention "in plain public sight" 😉

Why are you not going to the beach??
Like size 12 or 14 is UK average.
There is even no reason for someone to comment on it (it should make no difference but I understand the worry).

Tbh this is the saddest thread I red on MN.
Why are women kept away from simplest things like enjoing sunshine?
Depressing 🥶

I’d think good for you. I have a 12 inch scar on my torso thanks to cancer and will be wearing a bikini this summer.

I'd feel sad for you and be thinking about how hard it must be for you to move about, and I'd wonder why you'd done that to yourself. But I'd think that wherever I saw you.

Yes!!! Be proud of your war wounds!!! Maybe I'm odd but I think scars are cool.

I had spine surgery 10 years ago...prior to the surgery I would never wear a bikini anyway...even though I was "normal" weight...I had no body confidence at all because of domestic abuse violence (which caused the need to have the surgery sadly): the resulting scar was a watershed moment for me...because I didn't want to cover it up: I was so damn proud of myself for enduring that awfulness and pain and learning to walk again and doing it all myself (I lived by myself at the time - had no family to help as I was overseas). And so (ridiculous really - but that's what a violent abusive relationship will do) I started going swimming in a local pool and gradually changed from wearing a tankini to wearing a bikini top. Then got braver during covid lockdown (the benefits to people having to stay well away from you!!) and started to brave wearing proper bikini bottoms rather than shorties. I'm so glad I did - and frankly a bit peeved with myself for waiting that long!!!

Nasty surgery can put things in perspective...and I am not going to restrict myself to not laying on the beach or not wearing a bikini just because I don't look like a Vogue cover model.

I'd be happy to see someone who is a bit larger like me! Either that or I wouldn't notice

I'd admire her couldn't give a shit attitude. I was once over 20 stone (now 13.5 st) and would have been far too self conscious to lie on a beach. Respect to that woman!

SO HAPPY for you!!!! This is awesome! So glad you put your brave pants on - and your sunscreen - and went and had a lovely day on the beach. I hope this is the start of many many more lovely excursions for you.

On the point of getting up: Sand can indeed be a pain...you might consider taking a thicker yoga mat with you to both lay on and also stand on when you are getting up - it might be a bit more stable for you. Also if you have buddies with you and you take a cooler (the classic hard sided ones) you can use that to push yourself up.

Hopefully you start to enjoy the beach so much that you head there even in cruddy weather and just take walks along the water's edge - the salt water is so nice for the feet, and the sand can be more forgiving if you have joint problems. Go from there to perhaps joining a swimming club!!! There are some lovely ladies of all shapes and sizes (frankly most are on the heavier side from what I've seen) at my local beach - I think they are members of a club called the "Blue Tits" (heehee!) that is national. They meet up most mornings and go for a splosh in the sea - some of them swim, others just enjoy a float and a chat and some hot drinks afteerwards! Dry Robes are very forgiving!!!

Sending you lots of kind thoughts - I am sorry some haven't been so kind. I am also sorry that some of the posts here have been "overly" or "faux" nice - because the sad fact is that there are lots of people out there who will look and will be unpleasant - the key thing is to not let them have any impact on your enjoyment of what you want to do at all. They are just noise - like seagulls (and just as full of shite).

People think about you a lot less than you imagine. They have their own shit going on. In general that's useful to remember.

Good to read that you enjoyed your day.

No one cares. Everyone is in their own head.

Nothing of it !

I always think you can feel insecure at home or feel insecure on the nice warm beach beside the sea 😊

Wouldn't even register to think anything tbh.

I saw a man with one leg on a beach. That's as deep as my thinking got.

I'd give it more thought if I saw nipple tassels maybe?