Male staff member in store

[Pbjsand]

Not sure if IAMBU about this, but it irritates me to no end:

I often go to a store for groceries. The store has taken to putting a male member of staff at the door (not security) to greet customers. I’m usually rushing in and out after/before school run and every.single.time. I have this man in my face saying hello as I enter and goodbye 5-10 mins later as I leave.

I feel harassed and like I’m forced to interact with an unknown man for no apparent reason when I just want to get on with my shopping, even when I make a point of looking away, trying to enter the store as far as possible from where he’s standing. It makes me so uncomfortable but I can’t put my finger on why.

I can see how it would be annoying. However, it could be worse - he could be trying to sell you something, 'invite' you to contribute to a charity etc. I hate those approaches, it's so intrusive.

Quite a lot of shops seem to have these greeters now, not sure why it’s so annoying, if he was physically stopping you or trying to make you buy something/ give something I could understand the annoyance. Is it because it’s a male?

I always say hello to the security guy on the door - what a boring job!

He's being polite not giving you the Spanish Inquisition.

It’s annoying but not harassment. Just shop somewhere else!
I can’t stand those guys on the way out of the supermarket that try and sell me breakdown cover. I just walk past and ignore them.

Why do you highlight him being male? The entrance to a shop isn’t an area you would normally expect to be single sex. Would you prefer the shop put a woman at the door?

He’s not trying to engage you in conversation. Just smile and nod.

he may not be security but I bet he’s been put there to try and deter shoplifters

Is it so hard to say hello on your way past. Would you feel any different if the person was female?

It's a security thing, not some random guy wanting to be your new best friend.

Loads of stores have this. Just say hello and walk on- I'm sure if this was a female member of staff you wouldn't feel the same. The guy is just doing a job! Much better than the people trying to sell you energy tariffs or donate to charity.

There have been studies that have shown sometimes even a hello from a member of staff can deter shoplifters (certainly not all, but probably enough to make the wages of this person worthwhile). I doubt he spends any time thinking about you OP, why does it bother you so much?

Ffs. Say hello or ignore him. Enough people must like the greeting or there must be another purpose. No idea why being male makes a difference either.

The Greeter couldn’t care less about you as an individual. He doesn’t want to engage in depth with you. His role is to say Hi. Surely you can say Hi as you walk past?
They are there so that those with more nefarious intentions realise that that have been clocked. Innocent shoppers won’t worry.
And he can’t help being male!
So yes, YABVU.

Especially when they say “Do you want to help poorly children”, which I find extremely manipulative. I always so “no thanks”.

Unless you are a shoplifter why are you so bothered? He's there to provide Security - for the shop and genuine customers.

bizarre to feel harassed by it - just ignore if you don't want to engage.

I say hello to the guy on the door of my local Waitrose even if I just walk past and don't go in. When I do go in, if it's to collect a parcel he always makes sure that a staff member (sorry, "partner", it's Waitrose) comes over to sort it out promptly.

He's just doing his job! Saying hello to every customer means that the shoplifters are aware of a security presence as they like to go unnoticed, he may not be an actual security guard but it's a deterrent all the same.
Shoplifters are an epidemic right now and forcing the costs up more and more to cover stolen goods so a simple solution like this shouldn't be a worry to those genuine customers.

You are annoyed by seeing a man being friendly as part of his job? YABVU poor bloke probably doesn’t want to stand there!

I get it, I hate forced interaction. I don't need someone to greet me on my way in, I just need helpful and knowledgeable staff who ate treated well by their employers. I'd be inclined to ignore, ignore, ignore. Alternatively find somewhere else to shop if it's an option.

Either brief nod, or if you really don't want to engage, don't make eye contact.

With the ones who stop you in the street and hassle you I just stare them out and keep walking, but that's not for everyone

He could well be security, would you feel the same if there was a female member of staff on the door?

Strange reaction. It’s a simple hello and goodbye as you walk past. You are not forced to stop and chit chat and surely doesn’t affect your actual shop whatsoever.
confused why you feel the need to highlight it’s a male doing this also

also sad to think that a cheerful thing like a hello and goodbye can be seen as something negative

This is a very over the top reaction. He’s there to greet people, let the man get on with his day for god sake.
If a man being paid to be polite to the general public in a shop makes you uncomfortable that’s your own issue.

I find it more annoying when there's people trying to sell you a new energy deal or such like, outside stores. We've had Scottish Power outside our local Asda all last week; absolute pain in the arse - try to engage as people enter and exit the store, standing in the way. One actually asked my son when he was walking passed the store - he's 14 and was wearing his school uniform!!! 🤣 He told me he looked at the person and said 'I'm 14, in my school uniform, do I look like I pay the energy bill'!!! 🤣🤣

You're being weird.

We have that in our Asda. The security guy sitting at a desk saying hello and bye as you enter and leave. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. I say hi and walk past, there's no obligation to stand and chat.