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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH won't let daughter go on school trip to mosque

318 replies

RealUmberAnt · 14/05/2025 20:14

I'm shocked and appalled!! He (M41)says he doesn't want her (DD12) learning about people who marry there daughters off at 9 years old and all their women are oppressed and forced to cover up and do as their told!

I feel like he's taring all Muslims with the same brush and it's good to learn about other religions and see other places of worship!

I'm so mad!! I honestly don't think I can stay with someone who has these opinions!!

OP posts:
WinterMorn · 14/05/2025 20:16

Your husband needs to have a long hard look at himself. How confident do you feel in unpicking his opinions?

Childanddogmama · 14/05/2025 20:17

Your DH is exactly the reason why these trips are so important! Your don't have to agree with every element of their faith just be tolerant and respectful. Hope your daughter ends up going.

sheselectric13 · 14/05/2025 20:17

He’s racist. Disgusting.

Emonade · 14/05/2025 20:19

Thats horrendous, has he ever met someone who is Muslim? Can you let her go without him knowing? you don’t want her absorbing his opinions. Has he always been like this?

Partypops10 · 14/05/2025 20:19

Make sure she goes anyway

OatFlatWhiteForMe · 14/05/2025 20:19

That would be a real eye opener for me. These trips are essential to combat such racist crap!

Original poster
RealUmberAnt · 14/05/2025 20:19

WinterMorn · 14/05/2025 20:16

Your husband needs to have a long hard look at himself. How confident do you feel in unpicking his opinions?

I've had to walk away for now. I can hear him telling my daughter all the bad things he can think of and it's making me question the last 20 years together!!

OP posts:
LesMisSaigon · 14/05/2025 20:20

We took some students to visit a mosque a few years ago. I found it so interesting, as did our students. It definitely helped to change some of their negative perceptions of Islam.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 14/05/2025 20:21

I'm not sure what's more depressing. Your husband's attitude or that a 3rd of voters so far agree with him

WinterMorn · 14/05/2025 20:22

RealUmberAnt · 14/05/2025 20:19

I've had to walk away for now. I can hear him telling my daughter all the bad things he can think of and it's making me question the last 20 years together!!

Show quote history

I feel for you. Here for support whenever you need it 💐

HellsBalls · 14/05/2025 20:23

Are the Muslim children getting a reciprocal visit to a church?

Sirzy · 14/05/2025 20:23

His views, and the fact he is trying to force them on her, make it all the more important she attends the visit.

Hyperquiet · 14/05/2025 20:23

Wow have you never heard these horrible views of his before now

StMarie4me · 14/05/2025 20:23

Does he think all Christians are paedophiles? As there’s been loads in USA uncovered lately. Or that all Christians are KKK?
Is this born of ignorance (as in he needs to learn) or pure racism? Can you educate him?

catsatonmat · 14/05/2025 20:23

He's correct about Islam but your daughter should go anyway to see what it's like in person. It will be an education. She'll notice the sex segregation and, if it's like many mosques, most likely that the men's area is larger and nicer than the women's area.

WinterMorn · 14/05/2025 20:23

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 14/05/2025 20:21

I'm not sure what's more depressing. Your husband's attitude or that a 3rd of voters so far agree with him

I have been disappointed but not shocked at some of the blatant racism and bigotry on here recently. It’s a serious problem.

ItGhoul · 14/05/2025 20:24

I find it hard to believe you didn’t notice he was a thick racist before you married him

user2848502016 · 14/05/2025 20:24

Sorry but he sounds awful. Yes those things are horrible and shouldn’t be allowed but I have Muslim friends and colleagues and none of them would condone child marriage, also only one of the women I know wears a head covering

Trallia · 14/05/2025 20:24

Can you suggest he volunteers as a parent helper on the school trip to address his evident ignorance?

BethDuttonYeHaw · 14/05/2025 20:25

He’s a real bigot and your daughter needs these trips to make sure his prejudices is countered by education

No3392 · 14/05/2025 20:25

I couldn't be with a racist.

And I wouldn't want my children around one either.

Make sure your daughter goes.

StupidBoy · 14/05/2025 20:26

I'd be interested to know from teachers how many of their Muslim pupils are barred from going into churches or sikh temples or other places of worship by their parents.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 14/05/2025 20:26

I'd be asking him to move out due to concerns about my dc being exposed to racist and islamophobic views in the home. Or else I'd be going and taking any dc with me.

Who would want to stay with a twat like they anyway?! Have there really been no signs of this in the 20 years that you've been with him? Has he been radicalised online or something?

LaurieFairyCake · 14/05/2025 20:26

Yes of course all the Muslim students go on trips to churches as part of the GCSE curriculum for RE

my dh was an RE teacher for 25 years, not one Muslim student was opted out like the OPs kids dad wants to

Lavender14 · 14/05/2025 20:27

Honestly I'd suggest he goes with her. He might learn a few things. Except then the people in the mosque would have to experience him

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