My 84yr old Mum asked if she should be addressed as a Woman

[Horrace]

Yesterday my 84yr old Mum had to be interviewed by the police after witnessing a sudden death of a close friend. The death was traumatic in itself and happened abroad.
The first question the officer asked my mum was " would you like to be addressed as a woman?"
My mother was furious at this but also so upset and tired that she burst into tears.
I am so cross. I don't understand why they would ask her this. Would they ask a man similar.

I know she's been through a lot but it's a bit harsh telling someone off for doing their job

As a pp said, mindless pandering to a tiny minority. Ludicrous! I am sorry your mum was upset @Horrace

I thought this 'people with uteruses,' 'person who menstruates,' 'person with a vagina,' and 'pregnant people' type nonsense was stopping! It needs stopping! I never hear 'person with a penis' or 'person with bollocks' funnily enough. It's just women that certain parts of society are trying to erase.

I would be LIVID if someone asked me what I identify as. I'd be tempted to say 'a fucking ship!'

Institutions need to stop pandering to this shit

People with trans identities need to become grown ups who just tell people if they want to be referred to as not their sex.

On the contrary, the more people do this the better. Hopefully when enough people get shouted at/told off for nonsense like this, this ludicrous 'what do you identify as' shite should begin to cease!

Or... people just answer and that whole two seconds of your life is over with and you move onto the next question 🥴

This thread is a big departure from the threads where people say women shouldn't have a problem being asked if they are women in the women's toilets. It's just a question, what's the harm is the usual answer.

Well you’ve upset yourself there haven’t you with that ridiculous thought process to a completely simple question.

I was going to mention something along these lines.

My 72 year old DH has recently had his knee scanned, his ankle scanned and his wrist- all in the past 4 years or so. Each and every time he has been on the receiving end of a red-faced radiographer mumbling 'I'm sorry but I have to ask this but could you be pregnant'.

As I am a fully paid up member of the MN gardening club and occasional attender of various book launches I know (and he knows) why these poor people have to ask this.

But it's a fucking embarrassment.

Report the police force to the SEEN (Sex Equality & Equity Network) in police network. They'd be interested in this gender batshittery.

https://www.policeseenuk.co.uk/

This is the same logic of people who protest “do I look like a terrorist though?!” when going through security at an airport.
Total pig headed assumption that what’s obvious to them should be obvious to everyone and basing all their judgements on outside appearances. And thinking that the rule for others doesn’t apply to them.

Everyone should be asked how they prefer to be addressed, whether it is “obvious” or not in their opinion.

Or.... they could just NOT ask - when it's bloomin' obvious! 🙄

Don't try to make out this is OK. Because it's not.

The shame is that it has become part of some poor person's job to ask what is clearly a damn fool question the answer to which they know perfectly well is completely irrelevant, as well as already knowing perfectly well what that answer is.

In what way is the sex of a witness to sudden death relevant to anything whatever? Unless of course fifty per cent of what the witness saw is about to be discounted because they are a woman and therefore emotional and unreliable, I suppose.

That's because the odds of an actual woman being asked that question are similar to winning the Lotto Rollover and seeing a tartan unicorn being ridden by a haggis, on the SAME night.

The people at 'risk' of being asked are men.

Yes, they would have asked the same question of a man.
Plenty of 84yr olds are finally feeling able to live as they choose rather than as society dictated so it is respectful to ask.
MN won't see it like that because it's a bizarre alternate universe where personal choice is only selectively approved of, but I suspect you already knew that or you wouldn't have asked.

So now being a woman is comparable to being a terrorist.

Wonderful.

Has been for a while, hasn't it? The usual accusation is that a woman is "literally killing" such a person by asking their actual sex.

Oh FFS, asking a man if he is pregnant?! And a man in his 70s?! 😂 What is the world coming to? This ludicrous shite needs putting in the bin.

I'll be glad when it's all stopped, and we resume normality.

My DH would say 'are you taking the fucking piss?' if someone asked him if he was pregnant, (a man in his early 60s.) He would 100% have the right to ask this too!

No it isn't.
He apologised for being so rude

Yep, we've reached peak batshit on the thread now. 😜 It's been getting there for a while, but there it is!

I’ve been mistaken for a trans woman (tall, big shoulders, massive hands). Before you lot all decided you could always tell it was only a couple of times (or it was probably loads of times but nobody cared). Looking forward to loads of fun in bathrooms going forward.

Good.

But they don’t have to ask.
If the form has a box for “pregnant”, you quietly tick no when confronted with an elderly gentleman, just as you would if you were examining a two year old child; rather than performing this nonsensical shite.

I wonder how the conversation would progress should a 76 years old say yes I am 6 months pregnant.👀

@UnctuousUnicorns is there a reason you can't take HRT?

That could be ONE approach to this pressing conundrum.

PATIENT: Yes, I am 6 months pregnant. I'm having twins. Nursery is all painted (gender neutral colours OF COURSE).

NURSE [GAPING]: How can YOU be six months pregnant?

PATIENT: Well, you tell me, nursey. You're the one who felt the need to ask the question of a 76 year old man.