MIL trying on my engagement ring

[Onering]

Strained relationship. Recently got engaged. I took the engagement ring off for a second since I was doing gardening, came back to find MIL wearing my ring saying how pretty it is. She had been going on about how much she liked it before but to put it on without my permission seems invasive.

She wore it and put it to the light to see the diamond sparkle and commented on how nice it looked.

Aibu about being annoyed from this? Maybe my rocky relationship with her is skewering this for me. My ring now feels tainted because someone else has worn it and being someone I don't have a good relationship with... But again that could be me being ott.

It's not really the main issue I know but please don't put your engagement ring through the dishwasher. It's not recommended as the very hot water and harsh cleaning products can damage the setting. That would truly be tainting the ring, I'd say.

I dont think it's a nasty question at all. Ivthink it's perfectly valid.

Ha. Okay 👍

Honestly? If my partner felt that my mother’s touch “tainted” things, I wouldn’t want to be with them.

Yes, it’s hardly a great basis for an ongoing relationship, unless all parents involved are estranged or live on the other side of the world and never travel.

@KaleQueen You’re crushingly predictable and boring with your pithy ohh you’re a bad ‘un reproaches to Anyone you disagree with

Edited as mis quoted reply.

Did you have a bad day again hun?

Ps I’m also a boring language geek so I’m also going to point out you mis-used the adjective pithy to describe my responses. You’re welcome 😃

🍿

My MIL used to try on my shoes. That was pretty grim

Should someone tell OP that her DH came into the world through MILs vagina so it already deeply 'tainted'. All the rituals in the world can't change that fact. If coming into contact with her is negative energy then DH himself has the most toxic negative energy of all.

Yeah, sage smudging isn’t going to cut it, is it?

Honestly, you’re being ridiculous. Your ring is now TAINTED because she tried it on? 🙄COME ON. Clearly you don’t like her. I feel really bad for your mother in-law and your husband. You must be exhausting. You’re worried about bad energy? It’s coming from YOU.

That’s helpful.

It sounds like you have a whole lot more than your tainted ring to worry about right now! I know that you know this, but your fiancee won't be ditching his mother when he marries, she will, most unfortunately, remain your mother in law, hopefully for life. Don't start out letting her taint you, instead make your love-and-light (and non-bitter acceptance) be contagious. Assume you tainted her, you tricked her with the ring, and now she will be better. In all seriousness, your fiance is being pulled literally in half, with the two women he loves most in all the world tainting each other; if you really love him (and not just the ring), look past the taint, look past the not-getting-along-swimmingly, look past what you wish she was - and be grateful she is in you and your husband's life, because she won't always be, if typical. Marrying him means marrying the whole clan, even his obnoxious brother in law, and that is what it means when you take them as your own. Not that they are the ones you personally designed for forever marital bliss, but because they are the ones that came with your fiance, and he was too good a package to pass up. Ask Mum-in-law if the diamond is as beautiful as she would've wanted for her son, and let her say, "yes!" without the awkward pause.