Is sending me money a red flag?

[Kenyaparks]

So I’ve been talking to this man for about a month now. We’ve done loads of phone and video calls. He lives out of state but he happens to live in the state that I’m moving to in a couple months. He is also coming out to where I am to visit me before I move out there.

I jokingly asked him for coffee money and he sent me some, I told him jokingly that it wasn’t enough and he ended up sending me more money? It was all jokes I didn’t think he was going to obviously do it, I definitely appreciate it. I was in the store today and I told him he should by a watch from the store I was at? He asked me if I wanted it and that he would send me the money… I obviously declined the offer.

is it a red flag that he’s sending me money and hasn’t met me yet ?

Send me money... OK
Send me more money... OK
Buy me a watch... OK

"Oh no, I'm such a victim and this guy is a red flag!!!"

You guys I sent the money back and he wouldn’t take it….. he sent me the money through cash app not a bank this isn’t the 70s we’re 24

he just got out of a 4 year relationship 2 months ago ….

Think about it this way OP. If you had a brother and he said I have been talking to this woman online. She is nice and I have been sending her money to buy coffee. In fact today I offered to send her money for a watch but she said no

Would you not be thinking there is something odd about the woman and her possibly scamming him as well as your brother being a bit naive to send the money

As pp said you are both red flags

I don’t understand why you’re asking him for money?

Exactly this. You say him sending you money is making you uncomfortable and yet you have "joked" or commented to him on three separate occasions for him to pay for something for you. WTF do you keep doing that if it makes you apparently so uncomfortable?

You are a red flag.

Your updates don't change my post on the thread

No, we're not buying that...

You can't feign ignorance here when you've asked him THREE TIMES.

If you actually cared, you'd have sent the money back the first time he sent it to you. Instead, you hinted that you wanted more, and then continued the game by hinting about the watch.

You know what you’re doing. It isn’t a joke. You’re testing the water to see how far you can go. Imagine if he ‘joked’ to you that he wanted money to buy a coffee. Now imagine you sent it. What would you think about him?

I’d be mortified to be asking for coffee money, are you that hard up?

You’re talking to brits. We don’t use venmo etc.

I think sending you money for coffee is a little desperate, but you asked for it (jokes of course ;))maybe he just likes you?

it’s a red flag to ask for money and then say it isn’t enough, jokes or not. You’re setting your stall out as a gold digger, he friends would rightfully warn him against you.

Taking money of someone you haven’t met “you are the massive red flag”
Its calle seeing a user !

I'd say it is possibly a red flag in a love bombing sort of way. Why would you give a virtual stranger money like that? Either you lack self respect or you're trying to draw that person in.

He Wants to know what exact apartment I live in when I move out there
He saves my pictures to his phone

he wants to pay for my ticket out there to go see him, and wants me to stay with him instead of staying in a hotel….

Agree, you are asking him for money and he is sending it.
He should be the one who is concerned not you

I would have instantly sent him the money back. Why didn't you?

Exactly. As a 'joke'. Repeatedly?

You still had to sent him the details whether it was via your bank or cash app.

Ah you have jumped the shark now OP but if this is real (big if) why do you need to ask a bunch of strangers if this is odd?

Well he has paid and now he expects delivery of the goods

If you've been together a while, asking where you live is fine. They'll know where you live anyway if you take them home that night.

Saving pictures and wanting to see you and buying tickets is also fairly normal. I'm not really sure what this is meant to add, and comes off as a slight humble brag.

I stand by what I said earlier in the thread - He will want ‘payment’ and you will owe him.

Send any money back and block him.

sounds like one of those scams - he sends you small amount of money, gains your trust then some emergency/disaster happens to him, he asks you, you trust him/feel obliged etc etc. or maybe I’m jaded 😆

Haha, course he does 🤔

You are effectively selling yourself

So you know he's vulnerable and yet you're suggesting HE is the unreasonable one...