To be getting second hand embarrassment because my DH is wearing sandals!

[Pinkbakewell]

For the first time since I’ve known him, my 43 year old DH has bought himself some sandals. I don’t know why but they make me cringe. I think sandals on men look so naff and ‘old man’.

I’ve put a photo of the pair he has bought on this post.

AIBU or do they look really naff and embarrassing?!

It's not sandals or closed shoes. There are choices in between. Sliders, flip flops.

Sandals on middle aged men are bleurgh and there's no way I'd walk round with DH if he had a pair on.

He has lovely pairs of havaianas.

If that makes me shallow, so be it.

My late DH wore kaftans, painted his nails and took snuff. He also wore sandals. Honestly, sandals are fine. (So are kaftans, painted nails and snuff, of course.)

Yes, it makes you shallow but also controlling.

Flip it - how would you feel if your DH refused to walk around with you because he didn’t like an item of your clothing?

If a woman posted that, everyone would be telling her that he was a controlling prick. No different here.

I think "odd" is an accurate way of describing you and the other posters who are having such difficulty with the very mundane concept of men wearing sandals.

I think googling men in sandals is odd, but each to their own I suppose.

Respectfully disagree. Nothing is worse than Crocs. 🙃These aren’t great though.

You have to suck it up, OP. My DH hates my Birkies but he loves me more.

Men get warm feet too.
I bet some clothing/shoes you have he hates. Does he ever tell you ? If no leave him be

It’s not about a different opinion. It’s about your implied assertion that no men at all wear sandals. Which is nuts.

Sliders and flip flops are types of sandal.

I suggested you did that so you could see they do, which, oddly, seems an alien concept to you.

Eh? what’s wrong with them ? they look like normal trek sandals/trainers - I only gave a problem with men in flip flops 🩴- they make me feel 🤢

Oh dear. My husband has a pair just like that. I showed him this thread and he was well offended! 😂😂😂

I think YABU

This looks like the women’s version of merellS or saltwater shoes or whatever they are called. Ugly looking shoes that look like toddler shoes.

Christ - tbh you sound like a horrible judgemental person.

Are you ok??

Mine wears flip flops or Birkenstock. Those are a bit icky

Unfortunately I think he has zero fashion sense. And he says he doesn’t care what people think of him. “He’s long past caring” in his words.

They are fucking vile. Is he a boring old man? I mean he’s 43 so definitely not old but…

if he’s otherwise alright I wouldn’t mind. It’s just a taste thing. I’d mock the shit out of him but I’d still be seen in public with him

My dh has v nice, tanned feet with well cared for toenails & he wears pale stone / khaki suede 2 strap birkenstocks. But only with shorts. He wears navy chino & navy cargo shorts & plain polo shirts. He looks good as he's 6ft 2" & slim build

I'm not a fan of the trekking style sandals on men or women. Neither of us wear them.

Are you?

I’m talking about myself and my peers, that is just my experience growing up. Did you read the disclaimer?

Sorry to reply twice, I’d actually just like to know what made you say this? After rereading it I’m pretty confident that it wasn’t horrible or judgemental, it’s just the truth about what home educated people of my generation dressed like.

Eh, as someone who is also long past caring (much) about fashion, I don't think I'd mind those, so long as he's not wearing them to places or events where casual footwear would be unacceptable.

Life is short. We spend far too much of it worrying what other people might think about how we look. I'd try to frame it in a different way. Find it attractive that he's a rugged individualist who doesn't care if sandals on men are unpopular. A certain amount of 'couldn't care less' is a turn-on, and I prefer quirkiness to rigid conformity.

All that said, if I truly loathed an item of DH's clothing, I might request that he not wear it at certain times (certain outings or gatherings), and I'd appreciate if he cared enough to humour me. But I'd limit those requests, because it doesn't actually matter and it's not nice to be frequently reminded that your other half thinks you have terrible fashion sense.

He should care what his wife thinks though

Why? It's down to him what he wears. If DH told me he didn't like my Crocs or Saltwaters I wouldn't take any notice and it would make more inclined to wear them.