To be annoyed that my manager said she “needs more energy” from me?

[ThatTaupeCritic]

I’m doing my job well, meeting deadlines and staying professional. But in a recent catch-up, my manager said she “needs more energy” from me. What does that even mean? I’m not in sales or performance - I don’t see how being more “bubbly” affects the quality of my work.

It just rubbed me the wrong way. AIBU to think this kind of feedback is vague and a bit performative?

What does that even mean?

What did she say it meant in context?

I have no idea what that could mean. Did you ask her for clarification?

Assuming you aren't a debbie downer who is negative most things

it probably means:
They want 2 pounds of flesh, one isn't enough. You must also surprise AND delight!
🤮🤢

I would take it to mean more enthusiasm

without a bit more info, it’s hard to say, but some people are very functional in the work place, they will do what they just need to, get the job done and go home. That’s sometimes ok and sometimes not. When I’ve had people in this situation what I really mean is I want them to be coming up with ideas, doing their work in more original than functional ways, looking to see how they can perform tasks more efficiently to free capacity to help other team members or do more, contributing to team meetings and the working environment, being interested in what the organisation does and how it operates, networking etc.

id start by asking the manager if they can provide you with examples of what they mean in the meantime, perhaps reflect - do you take longer than others to do your work? Are you very quiet and reserved compared to others? How does how you behave in the workplace align to your organisational values?

You could ask for clarification. If you are not front of house then it might mean work quicker or be more positive. Hopefully you are not vexpected to "high five" people.

id interpret as more positivity and give the perception you’re happy?

hard to say if that’s appropriate for sector or role but if she’s your manager I would take her word for it.

She didn’t really explain, just said she wanted to see “more energy.” It felt vague, like a personality critique rather than something actionable.

I was turned down for a job because I wasn't "bubbly" enough. I had been doing the job on agency for about 6 months (sick cover and the person ended up leaving due to ongoing illness) and the CF asked me if I'd continue covering until they could find someone else. If I hadn't desperately needed the money I'd have told them where to shove it. People who are full of wind are "bubbly" and normally spend their days gassing to others rather than actually doing the job.

I asked what she meant and she just said something about “bringing more energy to the role” - no specifics. I’m still not sure if it’s about tone, facial expression, enthusiasm, or what. That’s why it felt frustrating.

That’s fair, I do understand that managers sometimes want more proactive engagement. But that’s not how it was framed - it wasn’t about ideas, efficiency or initiative. It was literally “I need more energy from you” with no examples or context. I’m open to feedback but I think it needs to be clearer and tied to something tangible, not just vibes.

If she finds any going spare somewhere will she let me know? I could certainly do with it, think we all could at the moment. 🙄

Possibly but I’d still expect clearer language if it’s part of my performance review. I’m doing my job well, so it feels like I’m being marked on ‘vibe’ rather than outcomes. I don’t think being quieter or more reserved should automatically be seen as a negative.

Right? If she finds a supplier, I’ll bulk order for us all.

Do you think she meant you don't smile and simper enough?

I think you'll have to go back and speak to her again and get her to clarify properly.

Do you seem bored all the time? I have a team member who brings no energy to the role. It really turns me off her.

That’s honestly how it felt - like I wasn’t performing the right level of perkiness rather than anything to do with my actual work.

Private sector? Regardless, she's a dick head.

Ask her to clarify for your own interest but start looking for a new job. She's likely to escalate her nonsense and you're already questioning yourself.

No, I wouldn’t say I come across as bored, I’m just naturally more reserved. I stay focused, meet deadlines and deliver. I get that people have different work styles but I don’t think quieter = disengaged.

I sympathise. My first semi-professional job as a 20 yo student, doing back office admin for a bank, I had a tit manager. At my first appraisal, he had no complaints about my work other than the fact it there were no mistakes with my high-volume data entry, which he felt was a bad thing. 🙄

But the major complaint was that I was a cold, underwhelming person who didn't smile enough for a woman and all the boys on the team were scared of me. Must admit, I didn't actually mind the last part - I thought that was good. 😂

I think you're going to need to ask her to be specific. VERY specific.

It is private sector and yeah, the vagueness definitely made me question things more than it helped. I’ll ask for clarification but I’m definitely keeping my options open.

Honestly I’d assume it means you don’t interact enough with others to be a very good team member. Yes I know people here are hot on saying that there’s no advantage to speaking more etc - in fact you said “I don’t think being quieter or more reserved should automatically be seen as a negative”. But actually in many many jobs the way you interact with others matters whether they’re customers or your colleagues.

If you barely spare a word for someone you work closely with it might make them less happy at work for example. Or if you give off an air of really going through the motions at work it can have a lowering impact on the rest of your team. Vibes are contagious.

Obviously you are not there to bounce around and hand out lollies but if you displayed say 10% more perk that would probably do nicely.

This is why I think the manager needs to be specific. I wouldn't interpret it that way at all. I would interpret it to mean the manager wants Energiser Bunny levels of perk - which OP may be unable, or unwilling, to deliver. I sure as fuck wouldn't be able to.

It's all a bit nebulous as a criticism.

Workplace feedback shouldn't require interpretation, it should be clear, with specific action points.