It’s a LOTR one. I feel so upset over my DHs comment about elves.

[UnhappyHobbit]

Name change for this one as it’s slightly outing.

My DH is a huge lord of the rings fan. When my DH and I first got together, he used to “lovingly” joke that I was his hobbit. I’m only 5’3” and I do dress quite quirky so I took it as a compliment. It soon became a bit of a pet name for me and as he’s short too, I likened him to a dwarf.

Over the weekend, We were at one of his friend’s house and he has a relatively new girlfriend. Their kitchen /lounge is slightly open plan so I could hear slightly the conversation my DH was having with his friends. All of his friends are lotr fans and this new gf in the group is very tall. DHs friend was bragging that he had finally managed to pull an elf. My DH exclaimed that it was every man’s dream to pull an elf… One of DHs friends said I thought it was your dream to pull a hobbit, my pet name is known to his friends. DH said he wouldn’t touch a hobbit with those big and hairy feet.

I felt so defeated over this. He has called me a hobbit for years, affectionately so I thought.

I approached him about this after the party and he said that the whole hobbit thing was him teasing me because I’m short. He didn’t want to bring this up as, in his words “I made hobbit my whole personality”. We argued and I said, why is he with me if his dream is someone very tall and well the opposite to me.!? We haven’t spoken since and I’m wondering if I’m over reacting.

Aibu for being devastated and embarrassed by this?

I wonder if he calls her his precious...

Did you actually read the post properly?

The friend referred to his new gf as an Elf (tall, traditionally regarded as beautiful etc) The ops husband congratulated him. Friend said "I thought you loved hobbits (clearly referring to op - short, cute but not traditionay regarded as beautiful) Ops Husband basically said No Way, I'd much rather have an Elf... When confronted by op, instead of apologising, he continued to embarrass her by saying oh yeah I never really meant your pet name in a cute way, I was taking the piss. Really classy 🙄

Don't pretend it's not insulting just because the terminology is based off their shared interest that you don't happen to highly regard.

The sentiment and disrespect is just as bad as if he'd said oh mate I wish I could bag a supermodel like you, not like old shorty over there...

Thank you for the new crush!

Ignoring the piss takers, I think your partner was a dick OP. He's basically saying you're not his type, which would be hurtful to anyone.

Thanks! Things I didn't know (although I love Speed.)

If it's any use here's what Greta's alleged qualifications are: "Why she’s like Frodo:

• Took on a heavy symbolic burden (climate crisis) at a young age.
• Faces enormous global scrutiny and opposition, yet stays focused and morally unwavering.
• Has sacrificed personal comfort and normalcy to advocate for something far larger than herself — like Frodo leaving the Shire."

Makes me wonder a bit how much both Greta and Frodo 'sacrificied personal comfort and normalcy' and how much they were happy, at certain points, to get away from 'normalcy'.

Why are you flooding the thread with stupid computer answers?

Why not?!!

I haven’t! Not my thing at all.

What have I just read. How old are you all?

Every time someone takes a post like this seriously, a kitten dies

😂😂😂😂
Seriously?
Grown adults talk like this?!

I don't think you read the post properly if this is your interpretation. There's nothing in there that suggests the new girlfriend was involved in the discussion, and the conversation with the OP didn't happen in front of the others.

I can't see what's so wrong with the OP's partner saying that the hobbit nickname was teasing her. My husband and I have a joke about his short arms being like a dinosaur's, but I don't think he'd be devastated to discover that I don't want to fuck a T-Rex.

Used to date a LOTR fan. For his 25th I asked him what he wanted and he made me watch the whole thing. Sack the LOTR freak off and get a normal one. Even Star Wars is preferential.

I vote Gollum!

I love it when threads like this make miserable people implode.

I hate cats.

There. I said it.

Same.

Unbelievably silly

but it's not jokey or fantasy, because both OP and the friend's gf are real women, not hypothetical characters.

If they were saying 'would you rather shag a hobbit or an elf,' or even 'Rosie or Galadriel?' it would be one thing, but they were talking about two actual people.

Shag marry avoid

Rosie, Galadriel, Arwen.

I think even Sam would pick Galadriel to shag tbh...

They were literally saying would you rather shag a hobbit or an elf!

The reading comprehension on this site is something else.

I know, can you imagine being at a party with a whole load of them and they are conversing about hobbits and elves….I would be out the door

I didn't say the new gf was actively involved in the discussion. The men were (rudely) discussing the differences in their partners, not realising op could hear everything.

And yes I know the later discussion was just between those 2, but op was still embarrassed by what he told her because it was hurtful and insulting.

how is it the only group she fits into?
there aren't just elves and hobbits in LOTR, there are lots of humans too - in fact the whole overall plot is about the time of the magical creatures coming to an end and the race of men becoming the dominant species.
short (or in OP's case pretty much average) women are still human!

But they were not "literally" saying that - they were referring to their real life partners in terms related to characters from a shared interest piece of fiction.

Which op overheard, fully understood, and so got the dig at her.

For people on this thread who haven't read the original LOTR trilogy and are too young to have encountered the brilliant old-school Internet's Book-A-Minute summary of many great literary works, I offer you these links.

The summary of the Two Towers is particularly fine, IMO.

www.rinkworks.com/bookaminute/b/tolkien.fellowship.shtml

www.rinkworks.com/bookaminute/b/tolkien.twotowers.shtml

www.rinkworks.com/bookaminute/b/tolkien.returnking.shtml