Karma has finally happened

[stupidstupidstupidgirl]

Have name changed for this as don’t want it connected with my current name.

Roughly 7/8 years ago I finally found the courage to leave a very abusive relationship. I had to get a restraining order and move house to get rid of him. He was always threatening to kill himself if I left and would send me pictures of pill packets etc.

Anyway, fast forward, to the other day and I find out on the grapevine that he’s not only having tests for cancer but he’s also fucked his insides and will be on medication for life.

AIBU that karma has finally happened to offset the hurt/drama and general chaos he caused including DV.

I’ve not thought of him for years and this bought back quite a lot of horrible memories. I never sought revenge and have lived my best life since leaving him.

He sounds like an abusive shit and you’ve every right to feel like you do.

Eh because if it’s one persons karma then was it also karma for @Pinkrabbitt that’s how karma works. Nobody deserves cancer.

Yes but that relates to him. Nothing at all to do with you or the many other people who experience cancer. She’s not saying bad people get cancer as punishment; it’s specific to him so zero need for you to make it about you. 😌

“That’s how karma works”

You do realise it’s a concept and not a literal thing, so it can have any interpretation you want?

I hope the cancer is long and painful and he dies a terrified death, the evil fucker.

But if karma is real, doesn't that mean a similar thing will happen to you for wishing it upon someone else?

I don't really understand as I don't believe karma exists anyway, but clearly some people on this thread do.

@stupidstupidstupidgirl It's not really karma as anyone can develop cancer at any time, including you or your loved ones. It's not as if him having cancer makes you immune to having poor health.

You do realise that telling @Pinkrabbitt she has made it all about herself is not what happened here. I believe in karma, what goes around comes around. If people see one person as getting cancer as karma then why would others get it if they hadn’t done something wrong or bad.

What’s most concerning on this thread is the number of people who would be happy or glad at someone being ill or dying.

Emotions are not logical or linear and we react consciously and unconsciously when someone who is responsible for inflicting pain is compromised. It’s not as simple as oh don’t say that , and it’s not karma. It’s a natural defensive reaction when a threat (past or present) is extinguished

I don’t think the OP meant for a second that anyone who gets cancer = bad. She’s wondering whether she’s being unreasonable to feel satisfied that this guy is getting his own suffering after what he did to her. That suffering could’ve probably come from any source - car accident, locked in syndrome, severe disfigurement.

I don’t think anyone’s mental enough to think that anyone who goes through a health issue like that must’ve deserved it. That would be unhinged.

And I would agree with you there. However you asked how she got that from the op and I felt that with the emoji was a bit harsh when it’s clearly obvious how she came to that question.
It’s an emotive subject and people are allowed to take things personally. My friend is going through a tough time just now and asked ‘What did I do to deserve this?’ Think we have all been there at some point.

The reading comprehension on this thread is absolute dogshit.

OP, sorry to hear you went through all of that. Whether you're right or wrong to feel the way you do, you are entitled to your feelings.

I don't believe in Karma. I do understand though why people feel like a little bit of justice has been done when someone who has caused others great suffering gets a taste of that themselves.

Sorry what!?? So it’s deplorable to hurt animals but okay to abuse and harm your human partner?

Agreed. Plenty of people in this life get things they don't deserve. He has the outcome he deserved from the sound of it. There is a difference between wishing something on someone, and being quietly satisfied they got their just desserts when it happens.

You're not unreasonable for feeling how you feel, OP. But honestly, you've been living your best life without him for the last 8 years. Not letting him enter your head and disturb your equilibrium. That's what you always deserved. That's his karma - that he couldn't bring you down, and he never got to share in your happiness.

Put him right back out of your head again, and don't let him occupy your thoughts. Even now, wondering if it's good or bad karma, if you're being fair or not by reveling in it . . . it's all just negative energy you don't need. His misery is his business. You're free, and he doesn't get to take up residence in your head again. Let it go. Fuck him! You're better than all of it.

The majority of nasty, abusive fuckers I’ve came across are the ones that seem to fall into a pond and float up with a salmon in their mouth. They seem to flounce along life causing pain and suffering whilst enjoying their own.

On the other hand, some of the most wonderful, caring people I know have had awful luck, trauma and illness throughout their lives.

I only hate one person and I certainly wouldn’t be shedding tears if they were to suffer. I don’t blame you for feeling how you do OP.

I recently learned that my XH died some years ago. He was a violent nightmare but I got out and have had a very nice life for many years now. I didn’t feel anything much. Discovering his cause of death I guess he must have had a very unpleasant final couple of years but I didn’t rejoice at this. I wasn’t glad he’d died as my marriage to him felt like another lifetime to me. I just had a mild sense of satisfaction that I was alive and he wasn’t.

She ditched me in Mexico and I had to hitchhike back 80+ miles to San Diego with total strangers.
She borrowed a ton of money and never repaid it.
She was a nightmare houseguest.
She was a gigantic pain in my ass.
I knew her my entire life and still I loved her.
We were supposed to be old ladies together.
She died of breast cancer in 2007.
I’d give anything to have that gigantic pain in my ass back in my life.
Oh - her name was Karen lol.
I’m disappointed I missed out on teasing her over that whole “Karen” thing.

No such thing as Karma. Good things happen to bad people and vice versa.
If Karma existed, whenever something bad happened to you, it would mean you deserved it, but that wouldn't be so.

Probably not unreasonable to think it but I am not sure it is a mentally healthy place for your thoughts to linger in. If you have someone you can talk to and l process how the news has made you feel and the memories it stirred then that might be a good shout for you.

The best karma is to keep living that life you made for yourself after the split and focus on you.

Sometimes good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people
karma is a fraud.

Thank you for your replies. I certainly never wished cancer on him even when he tried to kill me one night. I actually meant about the way he used suicide to lure me back and now he’s fucked his insides by never quite taking enough to kill himself, just enough to be admitted to hospital etc.

he won’t linger in my thoughts but he really was a nasty fucker who has caused misery to quite a few women who fell for his victim ways (me included). Now he actually is a victim and he’s finally suffering like his victims did.

The karma isn't the cancer, its the fact you don't care that he has it.

Surely cruelty and abuse of another human is as bad animal cruelty?? Trying to kill your partner is pretty deplorable behaviour in my book.

Sometimes people get what they deserve.

Apart from dogshit, some of the posters, like the one who thinks animal cruelty is worse than human cruelty, are batshit mental.

And the OP uses karma as a figure of speech. It is not a real thing, you know, unless you are batshit.