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AIBU?

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Original poster

Friend not talking to me because I shared a photo from her Wedding

660 replies

ByTidyHare · 04/05/2025 16:53

I attended my best friends wedding a few weeks ago. The day after, I posted some photos to Instagram which were mainly of me and my DP, with one of them of myself and my friend.

This was posted in the morning and on the same afternoon, my friend messaged me to ask I took it down as she didn’t want any photos posted from the day. I said of course and removed it. Before the ceremony, there was an announcement not to upload anything to social media which I assumed related solely to the ceremony and as we were quite near the back, I didn’t take any photos of this anyway. The photo of my friend and I was taken later that evening.

My friend went on her honeymoon soon after. I learnt from another friend whilst she was away that she was really upset with me for uploading the photo and that it ruined her reveal of the day/dress with professional photos as people would have seen it on my page for the few hours it was uploaded.

I didn’t want to message my friend whilst she was still away so I waited until she returned. I apologised, said I was horrified and that I’d mis-understood the instructions thinking they only related to the ceremony.

She replied to say she was still really upset and that I took away the reveal which she’d only have one chance to do in her life and she can’t believe I ignored her wishes. I again apologised but she hasn’t spoke to me since and I’ve learnt from another friend that she doesn’t think she will forgive me.

AIBU to think my friend is now over reacting or is her reaction proportionate?

OP posts:
Mumtobabyhavoc · 11/05/2025 19:22

StupidBoy · 08/05/2025 08:40

Of course, but honestly it can feel quite invasive and violating having photos of you taken and shared without permission or the chance to vet them first. Especially if you struggle with seeing photos of yourself at all and are excessively critical of your own looks. I realise that may sound irrational and princessy to some people, but it's very real to others. It's something I've tried to lighten up on and come to terms with as I've got older, but it can be very hard to deal with. Social media makes it far far worse than the days of old photos that stayed relatively private. At least you didn't know who was showing them to whom. On your wedding day of all days, you want to feel happy and confident when looking at yourself in photos, and you deserve to.

Edited
Show quote history

It's something I've tried to lighten up on and come to terms with as I've got older

Me, too. 🩷

DarthElvis · 19/06/2025 16:28

That's a private moment. A moment shared with friends. It's a million miles away from being viewed by anyone with an internet connection. If you don't understand please read guidelines and references on the ico website. Privacy is a forgotten thing for far too many.

Goldengirl123 · 20/06/2025 09:08

Why does she think people would be interested in the big reveal??? Surely those closest to her were at the wedding?

KimberleyClark · 20/06/2025 09:11

Bridezilla.

Fkubitchh · 13/10/2025 01:06

ByTidyHare · 05/05/2025 17:30

Thanks for the replies everyone, to just pick up on a couple of things:

-I couldn’t edit my first post but it meant to say she is ‘one of’ my best friends. Bridesmaids were her sisters and two of her oldest school friends so no issue with not being involved here.

-I didn’t really rush to post anything, I’ve just checked and that was my first upload since last summer and was because it was a rare occasions I’ve actually got a decent photo with my partner! You had to scroll past three photos to see the one with my friend and I.

So your first post in a year was the one post your friend explicitly asked not to be posted.

Her special day, tainted by you.

Deny and make excuses all you want, this was deliberate. You’re an absolute bastard for this and when your special days come I hope someone is there to take the limelight.

kkloo · 13/10/2025 02:45

BoredZelda · 04/05/2025 17:19

She asked you not to post anything from the wedding. Your friend in her dress was from the wedding. However ridiculous you think her plans were, you agreed to the rules then broke them. I’d be pissed off too.

She is allowed to be as annoyed as she wants. You are allowed to re-evaluate your friendship if you want. But you don’t get to decide if how she feels is reasonable.

She actually does get to decide that.
In any situation like this you can weigh up how bad the thing you did was, and if you deserve to never be 'forgiven', if you didn't do anything too bad then you can decide that that person was unreasonable and over the top and stop feeling bad about if you want to and even feel annoyed at the other party if you want!

Boomer55 · 13/10/2025 08:53

Your friend is too much of a drama Queen. 🙄

LizzieW1969 · 13/10/2025 09:16

Fkubitchh · 13/10/2025 01:06

So your first post in a year was the one post your friend explicitly asked not to be posted.

Her special day, tainted by you.

Deny and make excuses all you want, this was deliberate. You’re an absolute bastard for this and when your special days come I hope someone is there to take the limelight.

Show quote history

Why did you resurrect this thread to stick the boot into the OP? You’re responding to a post that’s 5 months old!!

Createausername1970 · 13/10/2025 19:07

What is it with all the zombie threads recently? I don't even know - other than scrolling past the first 100 pages - how to find them easily!

godmum56 · 13/10/2025 20:33

Tis coming up for Halloween and the zombies are rising......

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