Accused of racism by client

[stample]

I work and deal with clients daily, I spoke to a regular client being polite and civil, and they too were civil back only to get home and email my manager saying I had implied a racist remark towards them. My manager knows this was not the case and responded back. For reference I am white with black children and the client was black (they wouldn’t know anything about my personal life)
AIBU to mention this when I next see them, obviously apologise if they thought what I said was racist and then to say my family are black…

What did you say? Were they specific in the complaint?

What was the alleged racist remark?

What did they take offense to?

What was the comment? Was your manager there?

"im not racist, I have black friends"
Sounds like a meme to me. I would NOT say that you cant be racist as you have black family.

Depends what you said or if you indeed said it?

What is it they’re claiming you said? Is it something that’s come across wrong? Or just your general attitude if you had to be firm or something and they’ve decided that you must be racist.

I know someone who once said something incredibly racist and when challenged said ‘I can say it because my kids are black’.

I am not saying that this is the case here, however having children of mixed race doesn’t exempt anyone from saying something offensive, whether that be inadvertent or otherwise.

You need to understand the context here and what they felt was offensive and work together from there.

If the manager has responded and put the matter to bed, then I would move on rather than possibly antagonise the situation further.

Any race cancelled be racist towards another race.

Do not apologise if you know you were not, and as it sounds like your manager has supported you.

Did the meeting/outcome no go the way the accuser wanted?

Your personal situation is not your clients business.

Can you ask not to be involved with a client who makes wilful false accusations?

I was accused of racism once by a client, but she never specified a remark, she just said I was racist. She also said I told her to shut up. Apparently she forgot where I told her at the beginning of our interaction that the meeting was being recorded. The recording showed that i was not racist, nor did I tell her to shut up.

Yeah, do NOT try to claim you can’t possibly be racist because your children are black. That’s just a) inaccurate and b) gross.

Don’t apologise if you did nothing wrong, why should you!

Having Black children, does not mean that you will have been immune from internalising harmful stereotypes. It is a mistake to think that it makes you somehow exempt from saying anything racist. You have not explained what was said either.

Agree, no apology is necessary if you are sure you were not being racist, it’s on them

How would she know though? She may not think that she has said something, but could very well have said something offensive. She has not clarified anything has she?

what did they accuse you of saying? There are some common phrases that can be seen as racist that you may not think about like the phrase nitty gritty.

Genuinely it’s care work for SEND individuals. I gave general feedback about eating habits and mentioned they had eaten watermelon.
The client in person smiled and said ok but in the email said the individual doesn’t like watermelon and what was the carer implying

If course she knows if she said something racist
If she didn’t say something racist and her client misinterpreted something then that’s on them, some people can read ‘racism’ into everything, why should people apologise in situations like that

Sounds OTT, you were simply stating what they had eaten. Some folks are sensitive to racial slurs and discrimination. Not to minimise the situation but it seems they took offense because they are overly sensitive, not because you were being racist, if that makes sense.

No, I would not apologise, I think you just unfortunately came across someone who just sees racism in everything, that’s on them, we can’t be bending over backwards for people like that, it’s almost bullying to expect an apology over something like that and also to send the e-mail to your manager and not say it directly to you, it screams if over sensitivity

Of course she’s not racist if her children are black. She’s far more considerate of what’s being said than some random white person with no black children.

Do not apologise

There is some history of watermelons being used in racist tropes. But if the person was eating watermelon, that was just factual and I imagine working with SEND that was an important detail relating to what the person likes to eat. You’ve done nothing wrong, but if you have to work with this person going forward then you might just want to clear up with them the reason you mentioned it and that you weren’t implying anything x

Not apologise in that sense but by stating truth, over sensitivity from experiencing racial slurs potentially. It doesn’t help that I live in a predominantly white area and everyone in the company is actually white Which is just coincidence