New mum friend came over, Left my house in a tip

[MyAquaGuide]

Made a new mum friend 2 months ago at a baby class and we clicked. After the second baby class she invited me round for a cuppa. When I went I stayed there for an hour, had a cuppa and she offered me a few biccies. Also Brought her a box of chocolates as its the first time I went round. Upon leaving she gave me some nappies. she didn't need.

I invited her round to mine and I feel like a mug. She brought an entire cooler bag of food for her baby. Used my sons new highchair and is baby led weaning so we went in the garden and the food went everywhere. She also needed cheese for his food so I ended up helping her prepare it from my fridge because she didn't bring any. She stayed 3 hours and I gave her endless drinks and food. When she left the house was a tip. She started walking into the kitchen and making herself at home very quickly. Oh and she didn't even bring anything to my house for the first time. Isn't that just a courteous gesture? When she left she said she could come round every week because her other son is at nursery!

I wouldn’t grudge a bit of cheese to a baby, but I also wouldn’t ask for it if I had other food. A cooler bag of food sounds like enough lunch.
I agree that she should have cleaned the high chair.

You perceived yourself as having been used.. don't do it again.
Meet at neutral venue or not at all.
Leopards don't change their spots especially if this was first meeting at your house so presumably on her best behaviour...

No.

Yabu. I never expect a mum friend to bring anything to mine, not a gift, not food for their kid as I'm happy to feed them. Mess cleans up, whilst I appreciate it would have been nice if she cleaned up after herself, it isn't the end of the world. Think either you need to go over to hers or a play centre or something.

I never go to someone’s house for the first time empty handed. After we moved inside from the garden she started giving her baby the fruit I offered and it went all over the floor. Then she said she couldn’t find her wipes so I was down on my hands and knees cleaning. While my baby was crying and she was holding hers.

it wasn’t a slither of cheese… I grated half a bowl . She lives 5 mins from me. Couldn’t she have fed her baby then come round? I made her coffee and she had demands about how much milk sugar and extra flavouring she wanted to. This is after she drunk about 3 glasses of juice too

Nope, this isn't a thing.

Yes first meeting at my house and I’ve only met her a handful full of times so the manner in which she came round shocked me

No - not when going for a cuppa/ lunch with mum friend. I just thank them for their hospitality and invite them back

She had absolutely everything else with her. Then needed the cheese to be melted. It seemed a bit ‘give an inch take a mile’ to me

Oh no it’s one of those mums. I had one of these, she used me for free babysitting, free lifts, nappies, and I couldn’t get rid of her she’d stay for the whole day!
Run for the hills.

Unfortunately, you're too tight and too uptight to host playdates.

I would try and get over this so you can have playdates for your child going forward. Where does this come from? Your parents?

For a dinner party maybe. Not another mum popping round for a cupps

Nope !

I don’t see how she could have left your house a tip if you were in the garden while her baby ate? And doesn’t ’preparing cheese’ from your fridge just involve taking it out?

Yea, for a housewarming party.

Gosh you’ve met a new friend who you’ve clicked with, your children are a similar age, 5 minutes walk away. You’re lucky. This could be a friend for life and you’re getting het up about sharing your cheese and juice with her and judging her for not bringing you a gift.

I think you’re being daft OP

Nope, never.

You sound incredibly uptight. (Come on… ‘preparing cheese’?!)

Relax. Enjoy the company. Clean up later.

Oh no! I have a feeling she could be like this. She said she doesn’t have many local friends either. And complained about money but sends her other child to a really expensive private school?

You sound a bit precious.

😯

It all seemed reasonably normal to me!

Yep!

No

What kind of slob leaves someone else's home in a a mess 😕. The least she could do is clean up after herself.
Was her house a tip when you visited?