Meal Drama over £2

[Nightlightonplease2025]

My cousin invited myself and two other women out for a 'taster meal session.' I accepted right away. Another declined and the other woman my good friend stated she would come along. Today was the day of the meal and my friend came with her 18 year old daughter. We all sat together in a group of 4. When asked by the waitress regarding still and sparkling water, my cousin stated still. The waitress came back and poured the water into all 4 glasses. At some point during the meal my cousin went to drink some water and she noticed a lipstick stain, it seems my friend had drank from her glass and her own by mistake, it didn't seem like much, it seemed like only a few sips from the glasses as the majority of water was still in the glasses. My cousin asked for a new glass and my friend started to drink out of her own personal water bottle and didn't drink again from the glasses. My friends daughter also drank the still water.

My cousin asked for more water and I drew her attention to the fact she said still at first and did she mean it, she stated no and said she had meant tap. The waitress came back with more water and started to pour it into the glasses, my friend stopped her stating she didn't drink tap water. We continued on with the meal and had a great meal, ordering drinks etc. I believe my cousin asked for the bill and then my friend and daughter said they needed to go to the bathroom. The bill came before they left to the bathroom. The waiter stood waiting and my cousin asked if he could come back later, we did also mention the two other guests were in the toilet as he thought they had left for some reason. I added my bill up and my cousin added her bill up and I asked about the water as I noticed she had attributed a quarter of it. She stated everyone drank from it. I said okay and added a quarter onto my bill. The waiter came back and asked if we were paying now, I think it had been around six minutes since he had been at our table. My cousin paid and then asked are you paying and the waiter came over to me and asked how much I was paying, so I told him my portion and paid.

My friend and her daughter came back and sat down. As she was looking at the bill I tried to explain it to her twice and she looked annoyed and said yes yes, I know. As a discount on the bill had not been clear, I had wanted to explain it. I couldn't even explain to her that the water had been split 4 ways. She called the waiter over to pay and I asked her how much she was paying and she stated £94 and I stated the balance was £96. She looked visibly upset and said why was she paying for the water and if she was it was suppose to be split 3 ways not 4. To tell you the truth I couldn't really understand this argument. So I said her daughter was 18 and should be included in any split. Anyways she paid but was not happy. About 5 minutes after she left I got a text saying she was annoyed and other things, and that annoyed me. My cousin said I will pay her the two pounds give me her account details, but I didn't as I thought that might upset her more, so I texted her saying my cousin would pay, could she pass on her details.

So who is being unreasonable? My cousin or friend? To be fair its such a stupid fight and over £2. It boggles the mind.

I think my cousin should have paid for the water, but we shouldn't have drank any if we weren't prepared to pay towards it, regardless, if the waitress poured us a glass or not.

Also my friend believes we were a bit rude to pay without her and my cousin feels she was a bit rude to go to the bathroom before settling her bill as the bill came before she left, and she wasn't bursting to use it, she was just going to have a try because she had a long journey afterwards. My cousin thinks she could have tried after the meal, as we could have all sat and discussed the bill then.

Your cousin is in the wrong here:

1- still water arrives and she drinks it and drinks from cousin's glass leaving lipstick and causing cousin to have to order more water. If she hadn't done this, cousin would not have ordered more water and it wouldn't be an issue.

2- she drank the still water but declined the tap water. This is proof that she values one type of water above the other, and as she drank the one that costs money, she is accepting that there is a price to pay for that.

3- bill arrives and she leaves the table before paying? Who does this? Was she hoping you/cousin would pay for her so she could pay back (or forget to pay back) at a later time?

4- she causes such a dramatic scene over having to pay her share of a bill. £2 extra when the bill is £10 might be a bit annoying, but £2 on a £96 bill is not worth worrying about in the slightest!

5- You are all being unreasonable not to tip. £94 vs £96... it would have been so easy for you all to just round up to £100 (it wouldn't be a great tip considering the cost of the meal, but it would have avoided all this unnecessary drama!)

If I was your cousin, I would also think the water should be split. I would certainly begrudge having to pay £8 for water when not only did everyone drink it, but they also drank from my glass causing me to order more!

I think the £2 palaver is a proxy for ‘I don’t like your cousin’, but your friend’s not prepared to be honest about it.

I doubt your cousin much likes your friend either. Hence the Two Pound Water Wars.

I think your idea to see them separately is a good one, @Nightlightonplease2025 - although having said that your friend is cheeky to be acting weird about her adult daughter’s share of the bill.

I would tell them all to grow up and stop being so childish!

I wondered that. There's a lot of strong feeling coming from somewhere.

I’m all for pay for what you ate, but over £2 there’s no way I would be making that an issue! If I take my child out to dinner with friends, my child is my responsibility alone, I don’t expect friends to pay towards my child, it’s a given I will pay my portion and my child’s! Hers is a fully grown adult, at what point did she think it’s ok to split 3 ways meaning you all are paying for her adult daughter. She shouldn’t bring her daughter if she felt she can’t afford to pay for both of them.

Same system in Scandinavia. I can’t for my life understand the complicated system in the UK, making everything so unnecessarily difficult.

A casual meal turned into a courtroom drama over £2 and a glass of sad, lipstick-stained water. Imagine acting like you were robbed at gunpoint over a tap water split.

@Lookingtomakechanges either that or they were short on money and had to go to the toilets to make some quick finance rearrangements like transferring between accounts

Overall it’s all weird behaviour, no wonder the waiter thought they were all going to make a run for it

if someone had been ordering champagne maybe id get it - but water???
Personally unless I want sparkling water, I'll always ask for tap, but if someone else ordered bottled water I wouldn't create an argument about it.
& If half the guests had disappeared to the loo when the bill came, I equally would have expected a four way split, nothing to have a huge debate about, and paid my share.
the CF is the twat who expected you all to subsidise her adult daughter, then got in a huff over £2.

You all sound odd and way too anxious and unsure of how to eat in restaurants to decide to go out for a meal.

Your Cousin is BU, she drank from two of the glasses, so more than had her share. She then refused the tap water and drank her own, so she knew it wasn't tap water at the start when she drank from both glasses.

She's going tit for tat petty because of how she felt over the fuss over using the wrong glass.

This is intense. My head hurts.

Jesus. I’m exhausted after reading that. Storm in a teacup, total non event. Load of palava over nothing.

Just because you’re happy to subsidise your friend’s meal with her children and split the bill in the middle, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s fair or it should be expected of others. A family of 5 vs a family of 3, where the former drink soft drinks and all the children are having adult meals – it’s quite obvious who is paying more. But as long as it evens out in the end then it’s fair.

In OP’s situation, it made sense to split the bill 4 ways especially as it was a set menu and they all paid for their own drinks. That seems fair. The confusing part is not just that the still water, that somehow got split between four people, not to mention the fact that her friend and the friend’s daughter went to the bathroom with their coats and bags before the bill arrived for a long period of time so it looks like, to the waiter at least, that they dined and ditched. It’s clearly obvious that it should have been clarified upfront that the bill should have been split 4 ways except for drinks etc. The drama over the still water is just overblown and quite frankly is embarrassing given the fact everyone happily drank it, OP’s friend specifically mentioning not liking tap water, and not leaving a tip, which isn’t always necessary, but quibbling over the water just looks a tad uncouth.

Exactly this.
CF is in a big huff as she expected to pay £65 for both meals.

Split was rightly done 4 ways in my opinion.

@LadyQuackBeth You’re probably right. I read this part of OP’s initial post and had gotten confused:

When asked by the waitress regarding still and sparkling water, my cousin stated still. The waitress came back and poured the water into all 4 glasses. At some point during the meal my cousin went to drink some water and she noticed a lipstick stain, it seems my friend had drank from her glass and her own by mistake, it didn't seem like much, it seemed like only a few sips from the glasses as the majority of water was still in the glasses. My cousin asked for a new glass and my friend started to drink out of her own personal water bottle and didn't drink again from the glasses. My friends daughter also drank the still water.
My cousin asked for more water and I drew her attention to the fact she said still at first and did she mean it, she stated no and said she had meant tap. The waitress came back with more water and started to pour it into the glasses, my friend stopped her stating she didn't drink tap water.

I thought it was OP’s friend who said that she didn’t like tap water which seemed odd to me seeing as she didn’t even order still water in the first place. It was also even more odd that the cousin had ordered still water and the waiter assumed it was for all 4 and nobody corrected him/her. And somehow the friend accidentally drinks from 2 glasses and yet brought her own personal water bottle. It is all very bizarre 😅.

Well no i meant proper children, who would eat a child size people. You'll be horrified to know we split the cost of our yearly holiday by adults too. And we have the least amount of kids before you ask.

I would tell them I am not getting involved and to spend their own limited time on earth arguing about it, but I am bowing out and happy to pay the 2 quid myself to whoever it is they decide is owed it, if I don't have to hear one more word about it.

Jeez . . .

perhaps you could google "how not to be a pedantic twat"?

Out of everything in the OP, it was hardly the "myself" that was incomprehensible...

Fucking brilliant thread OP. What with the lipstick, the water bottle smuggled in her bag, the hoovering waiter, “going for a try” for 6 minutes, £5 for water that turns into £2 each but only £12 for 2 wines and a coffee. And hoping it’s just a “blimp” 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Thanks, brilliant.

No but the “myself” just starts the whole thing off perfectly.

I want to know why OP accepted “straight away” but the other friend declined. What does the other friend know that we don’t?

Tbh I'd have either paid for what I had or just paid a straight quarter as there were four of you.

I'm really not understanding where this £2 discrepancy came from? Is that just a share of the bottle of still water?

Tbh I think they're both being stubborn over £2.

I think assuming I've followed your post. Friend should pay, water was ordered for the table and there were 4 adults so spilt by 4 including the water.

But I do think, while I understand the sentiment, your cousin saying well I'll send her the £2 would be an escalatoring behaviour. Just laugh with your cousin about it but don't tell your friend, or this will continue.

Everyone paid so let it go.

Sounds like a lot of fuss about nothing.

Your friend expected to split the bill three ways so you'd all pay towards her daughter's meal?