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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Meal Drama over £2

291 replies

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:16

My cousin invited myself and two other women out for a 'taster meal session.' I accepted right away. Another declined and the other woman my good friend stated she would come along. Today was the day of the meal and my friend came with her 18 year old daughter. We all sat together in a group of 4. When asked by the waitress regarding still and sparkling water, my cousin stated still. The waitress came back and poured the water into all 4 glasses. At some point during the meal my cousin went to drink some water and she noticed a lipstick stain, it seems my friend had drank from her glass and her own by mistake, it didn't seem like much, it seemed like only a few sips from the glasses as the majority of water was still in the glasses. My cousin asked for a new glass and my friend started to drink out of her own personal water bottle and didn't drink again from the glasses. My friends daughter also drank the still water.

My cousin asked for more water and I drew her attention to the fact she said still at first and did she mean it, she stated no and said she had meant tap. The waitress came back with more water and started to pour it into the glasses, my friend stopped her stating she didn't drink tap water. We continued on with the meal and had a great meal, ordering drinks etc. I believe my cousin asked for the bill and then my friend and daughter said they needed to go to the bathroom. The bill came before they left to the bathroom. The waiter stood waiting and my cousin asked if he could come back later, we did also mention the two other guests were in the toilet as he thought they had left for some reason. I added my bill up and my cousin added her bill up and I asked about the water as I noticed she had attributed a quarter of it. She stated everyone drank from it. I said okay and added a quarter onto my bill. The waiter came back and asked if we were paying now, I think it had been around six minutes since he had been at our table. My cousin paid and then asked are you paying and the waiter came over to me and asked how much I was paying, so I told him my portion and paid.

My friend and her daughter came back and sat down. As she was looking at the bill I tried to explain it to her twice and she looked annoyed and said yes yes, I know. As a discount on the bill had not been clear, I had wanted to explain it. I couldn't even explain to her that the water had been split 4 ways. She called the waiter over to pay and I asked her how much she was paying and she stated £94 and I stated the balance was £96. She looked visibly upset and said why was she paying for the water and if she was it was suppose to be split 3 ways not 4. To tell you the truth I couldn't really understand this argument. So I said her daughter was 18 and should be included in any split. Anyways she paid but was not happy. About 5 minutes after she left I got a text saying she was annoyed and other things, and that annoyed me. My cousin said I will pay her the two pounds give me her account details, but I didn't as I thought that might upset her more, so I texted her saying my cousin would pay, could she pass on her details.

So who is being unreasonable? My cousin or friend? To be fair its such a stupid fight and over £2. It boggles the mind.

I think my cousin should have paid for the water, but we shouldn't have drank any if we weren't prepared to pay towards it, regardless, if the waitress poured us a glass or not.

Also my friend believes we were a bit rude to pay without her and my cousin feels she was a bit rude to go to the bathroom before settling her bill as the bill came before she left, and she wasn't bursting to use it, she was just going to have a try because she had a long journey afterwards. My cousin thinks she could have tried after the meal, as we could have all sat and discussed the bill then.

OP posts:
Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:38

Yeah I'm going to speak to both later, but it feels like its always me smoothing things out. My cousin will count things to the last penny, friend knows this. My friend, however wants to be included. But my friend is just as bad, she counts things to the last penny also, just slightly a bit less than cousin.

OP posts:
Blackdow · 25/04/2025 21:38

Did you friend expect the whole meal to be split between 3, so she would pay a third? Because she expected you guys to split her “child.” Or was she happy to pay for herself and her daughter?

I don’t understand the anger over paying for a split of the water when she drank from two glasses and her daughter drank it too, so is this really about the water or is it because you didnt split the whole thing 3 ways?

Why did she turn up with her daughter anyway? She wasn’t invited.

Namerequired · 25/04/2025 21:39

Did you split the bill 4 ways or pay what you had (or is it all the same?). Unless the daughter ate a kids meal she pays the same. And everyone should pay for the water. Sure your friend drank from 2 of the water glasses, so why would she dispute paying? Plus her daughter drank it.
Your cousin is right, your friend is ridiculous

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:40

It was a set menu price of £40 per person. We split the bill 4 ways. But my friend wanted the water split 3 ways I believe.

OP posts:
Helpmysanity · 25/04/2025 21:41

I'm lost, exactly how much did you each spend vs what you consumed?

murasaki · 25/04/2025 21:41

I always view people who go to the loo when the bill is coming with deep suspicion.

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:41

I would like to reply to some questions directly but I don't know how to form my reply underneath.

OP posts:
Blackdow · 25/04/2025 21:43

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:41

I would like to reply to some questions directly but I don't know how to form my reply underneath.

Click on “quote” on the post you want to quote and write your reply.

scoopoftheday · 25/04/2025 21:43

I'm still laughing at "and she wasn't bursting to use it, she was just going to have a try because she had a long journey afterwards."

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

murasaki · 25/04/2025 21:44

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:41

I would like to reply to some questions directly but I don't know how to form my reply underneath.

Can you see a quote button under the post you want to respond to? Click that and reply, or you can tag a poster with @ and type their username, you'll get a drop down menu after typing @.

loropianalover · 25/04/2025 21:44

I asked about the water as I noticed she had attributed a quarter of it. She stated everyone drank from it. I said okay and added a quarter onto my bill.

This is insane!! Jesus who doesn’t just cover £2 for a bit of water…. You both sat there and added 50p on, bloody weird.

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:44

We didn't leave any tip. I always leave a tip but friend and cousin, don't really leave tips, its rare they do. I was just too flustered and wanted to leave after receiving that text.

OP posts:
fashionqueen0123 · 25/04/2025 21:44

So your friend drank a bit from two glasses then doesn’t want to pay? And ‘doesn’t drink tap water’ ? 🙄🙄

Namerequired · 25/04/2025 21:44

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:40

It was a set menu price of £40 per person. We split the bill 4 ways. But my friend wanted the water split 3 ways I believe.

That makes no sense and is very petty. I can understand her being a little put out about yous paying without her, but you could have explained the waiters anxiousness. Asking for the water to be split in 3 is silly when she did drink it.

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:45

murasaki · 25/04/2025 21:44

Can you see a quote button under the post you want to respond to? Click that and reply, or you can tag a poster with @ and type their username, you'll get a drop down menu after typing @.

Thank you :)

OP posts:
Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:46

Namerequired · 25/04/2025 21:44

That makes no sense and is very petty. I can understand her being a little put out about yous paying without her, but you could have explained the waiters anxiousness. Asking for the water to be split in 3 is silly when she did drink it.

I did try to engage with her when she came back from the bathroom but she didn't want to know. So I couldn't explain the waiter's anxiousness.

OP posts:
fashionqueen0123 · 25/04/2025 21:46

I wouldn’t bother going out with that friend again for dinner.

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:47

loropianalover · 25/04/2025 21:44

I asked about the water as I noticed she had attributed a quarter of it. She stated everyone drank from it. I said okay and added a quarter onto my bill.

This is insane!! Jesus who doesn’t just cover £2 for a bit of water…. You both sat there and added 50p on, bloody weird.

It wasn't 50p, I added a quarter of the cost of the water onto my bill. It was almost £5 for the bottled water.

OP posts:
Helpmysanity · 25/04/2025 21:47

So she paid £96 for something that should have been 80, as your Friend ordered bottled water at what seems like £32???

KilkennyCats · 25/04/2025 21:47

How was tap water even on the bill?

Sorry, I see there was some bottled water

Namerequired · 25/04/2025 21:47

If there’s no tip how did the bill go from 80 to 96 though? Were there other drinks you paid separately?

limebasilandmentalhealth · 25/04/2025 21:48

You owe me £2 after I tried to understand what this issue was all about.

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:48

Helpmysanity · 25/04/2025 21:47

So she paid £96 for something that should have been 80, as your Friend ordered bottled water at what seems like £32???

Her £96 included 2 wines, 1 coffee for her daughter and her portion of the water and her daughters portion of the water.

OP posts:
FrodoBiggins · 25/04/2025 21:48

Nightlightonplease2025 · 25/04/2025 21:35

We paid because the waiter was just hoovering, I think he thought they left, as they took coats, bags, etc. That's why he was so keen for us to pay. To be fair she could have left her coat when she went.

They took their coats and bags to go for a piss?

whycantibeselfishforonce · 25/04/2025 21:48

I think your friend should have paid the £2 for the water. She drank some and it's £2 fgs. I absolutely hate bill quibbles literally does my head in.

Having said that, I think I would have waited for friend and her DD to come back from the loo and say to her ' Bill is here - right it's X each then - all OK with that?' She might have felt that you pulled a fast one as you sorted the bill when she wasn't there and paid your portion along with your cousin especially as you know she's a tight wad (if that is what you were implying?)

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