To feel embarrassed over DM’s lack of planning

[Plonv]

DM said oh let’s go out to a village 20 miles from here and have a small picnic. I thought she did some research. No she didn’t. This village has no green, park etc. so parents and I had sandwiches on a bench at a bus stop. I felt embarrassed. Then there’s DF with prostate issues who needs to visit the loo. Had to use a tree outside the village.

DM didn’t do any research as places she wanted to visit on the way back were closed due to today being Easter Sunday.

How old are you op?

God, give your DM a break, we're all capable of dropping the ball.

Its easily done. Just make sure you have a look at things yourself next time she suggests something.

None of you had a smart phone to jump on Google maps to find an alternative spot to eat? Or Google a pub you could have a drink and a wee in?
It's frustrating when plans go west, but this was such an easily rectifiable 'problem'.

Always have a Plan B in mind…

Im not allowed to make suggestions

I was told off for Googling an alternative place

I think you're overreacting.

If your DH needs toilets that's something he should be checking for himself really.

So when you get invited you say 'let me check the facilities will be ok for DH' and say yes or no once you've checked.

Of course you are, you're also allowed to say no.

You're not a passenger in your own life.

Did you not have a car to change locations? I'm not sure why it would be embarrassing

And?

Bit of an odd reaction to be embarrassed.
I've definitely done shit like this before, just got to make the best of it.

How can you be stopped from making a suggestion? It may not be accepted, but you can't be prevented from making a suggestion .

Ah, so the problem isn't your mum's poor planning, at all, is it. Are you very young and dependent on them still, or are you older but stuck in a dynamic established when you were a child?
Because you are allowed to make suggestions. Everyone is allowed to.

Were they at least nice sandwiches?

What's with the one line replies OP? If you want constructive replies you have to give fuller context, otherwise it's like talking to a child.

How old are you, OP?

How old are you ? Why embarrassing?

why can’t you say I’m not eating in a bus stop why don’t we go for a drive and find nice spot ?

Why were you embarrassed? It’s just you and parents… also google stuff yourself next time and don’t go if you don’t want to. Take some accountability for yourself rather than ‘I’m not allowed’

Stop being so bloody passive. ‘Not allowed’? ‘Told off’? You’re a grown woman. You can do what you like. Why are you letting your mother tell you what to do FFS?

Well then STOP GOING.

Perhaps the op isn't a grown women? This sounds like the powerlessness and anxiety of a teen?

Indeed. It’s never about the thing that’s posted about is it!

YEs - it sounds like a teen but I bet she isn't.

I’ve been embarrassed by my parents most of my life (until I had therapy and did a lot of reading) so i can understand that. As someone else said it’s probably not about this incident. My parents are not very bright but their favourite phrase used to be “ToroFerney doesnt understand “ when even at age six I had so much more common sense than they did.