Awkward shopping trip with MIL

[Harriett9]

I feel a bit awkward about a shopping trip I had with my MIL yesterday.

I gave birth 7 months ago, my DH was initially understanding in the first few months that I didn’t want to be intimate but he has become more frustrated recently.

My body has changed and I feel uncomfortable with my stomach. We’d been in a few shops and MIL suggested we visited a lingerie store. She pointed out a few outfits which would cover my stomach and said that ‘I’m sure DH would appreciate it, he has been working hard and you two deserve some alone time’.

When I got home I asked DH if he was aware she was going to do this and he said yes.

AIBU to find this really uncomfortable and inappropriate?

I know. Maybe OP doesn't have friends she would dare discuss this with? I'd be mortified and that takes something! Although my best friends would be told. I'd probably leave tbh as sex is important to me and I couldn't do it with such a freak.

I'd love to know what's going through people's minds when they vote YABU for things like this.

So he’s been telling his mum that you haven’t had sex recently?! Ick!

What in the actual fuck. Who gets their mum to intervene in their sex life. Theres all sorts of wrong with this.

I don't think I'd ever be able to have sex with him again.

Good grief WTF is wrong with them?

I'd be tempted to have some fun with this. Next time, take her into a sex shop and ask her what size dildo she thinks he'd like for a good pegging, nipple clamps? gimp mask etc

I bet that would make her STFU

Omg thats massively inappropriate! My vagina would be drier than the Sahara dessert and clamp firmly shut!

Wtf was your DP thinking discussing that with his mother. Did he tell her to take you shopping? I'd be having serious words with him @Harriett9 about boundaries and I would have told MIL straight its none of her business and to keep her beak out for the forseeable future!

Very strange to talk to his mom about , Don't feel your husband was telling you to cover your stomach. But you feel uncomfortable with your stomach. That was the reason you said you wouldn't have sex with him . 7 months is a long time not to have sex with your husband . Maybe that needs to be discussed, On weather you both want to continue a sexless marriage .

Ew ew ew.

I’m very close to my MIL (thousands of shopping trips over the years), my DH is also very close to her. At no point ever has my sex life been a topic of conversation. So so so gross.

Nothing would make a women less want to even think about sex with her husband than discussing it with his mother.

What is going on here? He is complaining to his mother about lack of sex. Why did he think this was appropriate? Why did she not think it was appropraite to say anything other than well it takes a long time for a women to rediscover herself after pregnancy and having a baby to look after, make sure you look after the baby so she gets time for herself. Why did she think you would want sex underwear or think it was appropriate to take you underwear shopping?

All sorts of wrong from DH and MIL.

Yuck. That just gave me the major ick. I would not be shagging that man any time soon, just yuck.

He has been working hard
So has the bloody op !!!!!

Seriously wtf
I feel unclean after reading this

Ewwww!! What a cock. And shame on his mum for going along with it.

I don't know who is worse, your DH or your MIL. Who even does that? I'd never want to see her again or sleep with DH every again.

I’d be having strong words with the husband and letting him know in no uncertain terms that the least likely way to ever make you feel like being intimate again is to have discussed your sex life or lack of sex life with his mother . OMG that is grim .

See I'd go and do something like this: tell your mother in law that you've had quite the back holiday. Tell her that you took her advice, and found a way to get the romance back. You bought a strap on and gimp mask and gave her son a good seeing too.

Love this!!

Wow your MIL acting as pimp to her sexually frustrated son… this would be a divorce level conversation for me. They could both get to fuck if my body and sexual performance wasn’t tickety boo enough for them 7 months in after giving birth. What do they think you are, some kind of brood mare? Ugh. I’m angry for you op.

If my son asked me to do that I’d give him a short, sharp shock and tell him to grow up and support his wife! Please do tell your husband how wildly inappropriate this was and do not let him get away with it!
I do understand sex can be an important part of a relationship but this is not the way to address this.
Don’t let it get you down OP you’ll be ready when you are ready xx

😱 I'm actually horrified!!! This is so beyond inappropriate I'm stunned.

I'd have instant and permanent ick. It is all manner of inappropriate.

there Would be no coming back from my DH asking his mummy to encourage me to put out.

This is so utterly disgusting and what is with the “he’s been working hard, so you deserve some alone time” comment? Never mind she’s recovering from childbirth, he earned money so deserves to use your body! Yuck!

That wins the Ick prize of the century........

Urgh. Reminds me when shopping with soon to be MIL and I bought ivory coloured hold ups for our wedding day. She said future husband will like those. 🤮. Divorced now.

For some this would be okay, for others completely inappropriate and made worse if he's been moaning to mummy he is not getting any sex. That's the issue as much as anything.