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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To respond this way to sister criticising my diet?

221 replies

ByOpenRubyReader · 19/04/2025 13:03

I've been a vegetarian since 10 years old, now 35. My mum/dad have been supportive since the start but the same can not be said for my sister who constantly asks how I'm getting my protein, B12, nutrients etc and has since I've been a teenager.

She did it for the 1,000th time while we were out at a restaurant and instead of explaining for the 1,000th time I just asked her if there is any sort of nutritional/developmental deficiency why am I 6" taller than her, in far better shape than her and a multimillionaire while she regularly relies on our parents for money.

She didn't say anything for a second then raised her voice, asked what was wrong with me and stormed out. DF tried to get her to come back in but was unsuccessful and told me I shouldn't have said that but it was a long time coming.

AIBU to think this was a reasonable way to respond, keeping in mind I have told her over and over again to stop commenting on my diet?

OP posts:
Okthenguys · 19/04/2025 14:39

Actually @ByOpenRubyReader - I take back the millionaire part being a low blow. I’ve thought about it and she deserved it all. Also wouldn’t apologize until she apologized for the 25 years of offensive comments and agreed not to mention your diet choices again.

thepariscrimefiles · 19/04/2025 14:40

ByOpenRubyReader · 19/04/2025 14:36

My sister has a middle class job, a stable relationship with her partner and I don't think she actually has anything against gay people. She doesn't say it quite so directly and doesn't say anything to his face but there are constant "jokes" when he isn't here.

Show quote history

Honestly, that's so rude and disrespectful of her towards your partner. I'd be much angrier about this than about her remarks about vegetarians, which were just ridiculous and uninformed. I doubt that she would take any criticism of her parter very well.

outerspacepotato · 19/04/2025 14:40

She FAFO.

A bit savage but after 25 years of that shit, you just served it back.

katepilar · 19/04/2025 14:42

There's only so much patience one can have. I dont blame you for snapping at her. Hopefully it will shut her up.

BunnyLake · 19/04/2025 14:42

MyUmberSeal · 19/04/2025 13:07

I was on your side until you made a pretentious comment about money and made yourself sound like a bellend.

Agree. You let yourself down there. Money doesn’t make you a better person.

My sister’s been a vegetarian for over forty years, I’ve never made any comment so that is weird and annoying.

arcticpandas · 19/04/2025 14:44

ByOpenRubyReader · 19/04/2025 14:36

My sister has a middle class job, a stable relationship with her partner and I don't think she actually has anything against gay people. She doesn't say it quite so directly and doesn't say anything to his face but there are constant "jokes" when he isn't here.

Show quote history

Why is she leeching of your parents then? I could sense that it bugs you which is probably why you made that comment about money @ByOpenRubyReader .
Like pp I think she's jealous of you and wants to put you down to feel better about herself. Subtle digs about your partner's sexuality and openly questioning your dietary choices was what she came up with. Well, I hope she learnt that you reap what you sow and that she will leave you alone now.

TorroFerney · 19/04/2025 14:45

Poppyseeds79 · 19/04/2025 13:15

Right, course you did! 🤣

You just wanted to get the boot in and tell her you're taller, thinner, and richer than her... And you think she scabs money off your parents.

I'd have told you to shove your carrots up your arse. You sound awful and smug.

Show quote history

But that may be true facts? It seems to me that the op always has to be the bigger person and the sister is the flaky one who can say what she wants. Not that I believe for a minute that the op is a multi millionaire. They aren't friends they are sisters so don't have to like each other.

CaptainFuture · 19/04/2025 14:45

. I don't think my parents were upset and they haven't asked me to apologise.
Sounds like one of 2 things then led by the long standing antagonist relationship...
•She's an absolute bullying horror who has been a nightmare to you all for years and they feel she deserved it.
• you're your parents golden child and they'll always side with you, even when she's crying, upset and left the venue.
I'd like to think even if one of my children was being a goady twat to a sibling, if they were as upset as she ended up, I'd still as their parent, want to check they were OK, not sit with the other, smugly telling them 'she had it coming'....

SulkySeagull · 19/04/2025 14:50

Hahah as a lifelong veggie who always has the same fricking questions about my diet from the same people over and over, I LOVE your response! My FIL constantly questions what I eat - he’s 18st, bald and has terrible health! I can’t be doing with nutrition lectures from him

Trolleysaregoodforemployment · 19/04/2025 14:52

YANBU - If she had been a friend the money comment would be unreasonable but as it is a sibling...

The sibling rule is 'Don't start what you cannot finish'.

godmum56 · 19/04/2025 15:00

ByOpenRubyReader · 19/04/2025 14:36

My sister has a middle class job, a stable relationship with her partner and I don't think she actually has anything against gay people. She doesn't say it quite so directly and doesn't say anything to his face but there are constant "jokes" when he isn't here.

Show quote history

oh that alone would be enough for me. NOBODY "jokes" about the people I love.

Namechangean · 19/04/2025 15:04

So many multimillionaires on mumsnet. Strange that

Spirallingdownwards · 19/04/2025 15:08

I don't think even the comment about your finances was out of order. She continuously critiques your diet which is inappropriate so you merely did the same back at her. She can't have it both ways.

SpotlessLeopard · 19/04/2025 15:18

The height point and maybe the better shape one at a push weren’t unreasonable. The multi millionaire one was nasty. It’ll be interesting how this goes moving forward.

Calliopespa · 19/04/2025 15:19

Biggest sledgehammer ever.

Calliopespa · 19/04/2025 15:20

You’ve actually made your response sound so OTT I’m wondering if this is a reverse.

PyongyangKipperbang · 19/04/2025 15:21

Namechangean · 19/04/2025 15:04

So many multimillionaires on mumsnet. Strange that

Not really when you consider how London centric MN is and how much property there costs. It could easily tip someone over into millionaire territory.

diddl · 19/04/2025 15:25

He is a very creative/arty type which she insists must mean he is gay or bisexual.

Well that would piss me off much more than her harping on about vegetarianism.

ludicrouslycapaciousbags · 19/04/2025 15:26

I have a family member(s) like this, like to dish out but when it's aimed back at them they get defensive and flounce. We are NC and it's been bliss Grin

beetr00 · 19/04/2025 15:27

OH NO!! MN

What on earth did I do? You haven't sent me an explanation!

beetr00 · Today 13:44

This reply has been deleted
Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ThisFluentBiscuit · 19/04/2025 15:27

You went too far, but that's what happens when someone keeps pushing and pushing and pushing until the other person snaps.

NotARealWookiie · 19/04/2025 15:36

To be honest sometimes you just have to be harsh and put people down in order to stamp out their insatiable need to pick on you to make themselves feel better.

I’m with you OP. She’s got away with it for so long because she’s family - you would never tolerate this from a friend.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 19/04/2025 15:38

Good for you! Sounds like she had it coming. Her constant criticism wreaks of jealously.

I don't see why people are up in arms about the multi-millionaire comment, she had it coming and it rightly put her in her place. That's not saying OP is superior because she's very well off, just that it clearly touched a nerve and is likely why her sister is so jealous of OP.

And as for her comments about her partner - she sounds fucking dreadful. I would go non-contact with my sibling over this entire unacceptable behaviour.

shiningstar2 · 19/04/2025 15:40

I wouldn't have said I was a multimillionaire even if I was one (I"m not) Not cool.

beetr00 · 19/04/2025 15:41

looking at the guidelines

  • No personal attacks
  • No posts that break the law, including hate speech of any kind
  • No trolling, misleading or deliberately inflammatory behaviour
  • No trollhunting
  • No spamming
  • No multiple accounts

Which of these relates?

Am comfortable being admonished but my whole posting history should show you that I'm a respectful poster.

Non controversial, at all. 😕