Neighbours go to bed 1am and up at 5am we are knackered , detached house.

[Motheroffive999]

We can hear our neighbours running up and down the stairs , they shout in the house, they shout to each other from the house to the end of the garden.You can hear every word.We hear them in the bathroom , word for word.
The worst thing is that they get up early and shout at each other in the front garden and slam their car doors at least ten times because they are unorganized and spend ages packing the car / going back into the house and slamming their side gate.
Am I being unreasonable and a grumpy neighbour ?
I don't want to be woken up at 5 - 6 am every morning if I have been at work all week.
I am tearful and grumpy all the time.
If they come home at midnight I am asleep and I hear word for word what the are saying to each other, it's a conversation that could wait until they get inside.Of course slamming doors and telling each other who needs a wee or a poo or a cup of tea or a shower first.
I know exactly who and when needs a poo , needs to put on deodorant, what activities they are going to , what they are having for dinner etc etc , with the windows and doors shut. Three generations living there and three children.
Our house is detached .

DH has spoke with our NDNs three times politely to ask them to tone it down. They haven't. So we involved the council. Which did nothing, but getting noise recording equipment installed might be worth a shot. Currently considering it.

I can understand how you would hear them in the bathroom if the window is open but I don’t understand how you can hear them in the stairs.

However, as you seem to be empty nesters and presumably have other options, can you move to sleeping in a back bedroom? Much nicer to lol out over your garden that the street as well.

Maybe try it out for a week or so to see if it helps.

As far as some neighbours are concerned, they'll go about their business their way and to hell with anyone else who isn't happy.

Thank you , this is exactly how I am feeling , I will do this.

And you're lucky your neighbours were respectful and considerate. Many out there aren't.

I don't get how you can hear someone going upstairs inside their detached house .... we also have twat neighbours, as do many of us sadly, but only hear when they are in the garden or have their doors open with music on etc.

I totally sympathise, OP - it is unbelievable how noisy some people are.

For years, I had neighbours who I could never hear. Literally not a peep. I thought I had an amazingly sound proofed house. Then new neighbours moved in - the kind who liked to yell to each other from the garden to inside and slam doors. I couldn’t believe it! I’d never heard a door close before and now I felt like I had slamming doors on a continuous loop! Like you, I heard entire conversations.

With a multi/generational busy household, noise & bustle will be their norm. They won’t hear you and your husband so it’ll be easy for them to forget they have neighbours.

Provided they seem friendly, I’d try to strike up a conversation and get to know them. I think when you know people, noise seems less hostile - you can think “Oh that’s just Jeff creating a ruckus!” Also, once you’ve got a rapport, it’ll be easier to ask if they can keep the early morning/late night noise down.

Good luck!

Obviously you have not experienced anything like this yourself, count yourself lucky.

I think you can ask them to be a bit quieter when outside at unsociable hours but I think you need to suck up the normal family noises of people living in a detached house, even if they are louder than you’d like.

I agree.

I just posted my own thread last night.

I'm on the verge of tears all the time with health issues so am subjected to the loudest voices all the time. Every fog horn conversation, crying kids round the clock, new whining puppy.

It's absolutely infuriating.

My last neighbour with child was so quiet I didn't hear anything.

If only that was my problem, but we hear them inside their own property disturbing us! They really are that loud!

I did ask them about 2 years ago to be quiet when they started going out at 4.50 am once a week and explained that I was sleeping in the spare room each Monday night as they kept waking me.

I agree, unless you've gone through it personally people should accept it's honestly that bad. No one is making this up. It negatively impacts your life.

I wrote a post last night OP. Hence my username.

I have asked my neighbours to please quieten some things. A new whining puppy all night on top of the other noise all the time was unbearable. They sleep through which I can't comprehend.

I think you can only ask and hope.

As suspected, they don't give a shiny sh*t. Have carried on being noisy...

Why are you only wearing one ear plug if you have no children at home? I wear two every night and don't hear my husband snoring beside me like a pneumatic drill. You need to wear two.

How can you hear them running up the stairs if you’re in a detached?

I would be questioning the build quality of the house if it is detached.

I am going to try this , thank you

I am very noise sensitive too. I use ear plugs with nature sounds and birds song playing. Some people are made of coarser stuff and are very extrovert,they are hard to be around, op it sounds as though you have a house load of them next door just as you are in a quieter phase of life. I doubt your GP will give you sleeping pills, they are very reluctant to do that these days. Try taking lavender capsules and moving your bedroom! Take good care of yourself. X

If you own and haven't already made an official complaint MOVE. If you have you're buggered as now you have to declare it on selling. If you don't own MOVE. If you own and have made a complaint buy earplugs (Boots do some silicone ones which are better then foam) and sound proof as much as possible heavy curtains, carpets, rugs, wardrobes on adjoining walls, double glazing all help. But people like this will not change, see they are doing anything wrong and are likely to harras you and make it even worse if you complain

Some of these complaints sound valid. Many of them sound like you can’t help yourself from hyper focusing on every little thing just because some things are a bit annoying.

There’s a gate that attaches to your house that shakes? Are you honestly trying to say that when they go through their gate you can feel it shake your house?

I suspect your husband is right. I have a relative in a detached house who insists she can hear every breath her neighbours take and it’s driving her mad. However her own TV blares at full volume and she still needs the subtitles on, and I have to repeat everything I say 3 times before she hears what I’ve said. She decided her neighbours are noisy so now it’s all she hears.

This is what I don't understand.

My neighbours are young, I live in Housing Association - having no comprehension or giving a fuck is part of the territory in HA. Also at 20 ish I was horrendously loud I recall.

With HAssociation loud mouths, you can add - white goods left in gardens, rubbish dumps in gardens, loud fog horn gobs, music blasting, dog shit city, overgrown gardens.

I have to visualise tazering people to help process it.

All the posters saying "I'm amazed you can hear anything" or "I live in a terrace and can't hear anything" - I would have said the same, until I had some really loud neighbours move in.

Up early/bed late, thundering up and down the stairs and slamming the front door at all hours, TV (huge) on so loud it was as if it was in my own living room, "talking" so loudly it travelled like yelling, actually yelling across the house/from outside at each other.

Then luckily they moved out and a new family moved in - it's heaven. I can hear footsteps on the stairs, a v quiet rumble of talking, etc, if I listen out. But basically I don't notice it. The only difference is the people living there.

Some people are incredibly noisy, with everything, in a way that is hard to believe until you've experienced it. It's extra hard because it's mainly the normal everyday stuff and you sound mad for objecting to neighbours talking or using their stairs.

I thought that too.
OP says she lives in a detached 1930s house.
I find it extraordinary she can hear so much of the goings on in the house next door if it is detached.
Hearing slamming doors and gates as they exit I can understand, but internal noise 🤷‍♀️