To think that parents shouldn't do this on behalf of their teens?

[bumblebee1987]

I have my own dog grooming business which is very popular with people wanting work experience/part time work, largely because it is mostly a lovely job involving lots of contact with dogs and puppies, so I completely understand the appeal with young people!

However, the vast majority of work experience/part time job requests that we receive (usually a few a month, more at certain times of year around school holidays etc), come directly from parents who are searching on behalf of their children. As harsh as it sounds, these are a very kind but immediate no for us. The competition for these placements is high, and I want to hear directly from the teenagers themselves, not their parents. It's great that your 15/16/17 year old is passionate about animals, but I want to hear that from them. I know that this isn't a high flying business, it is just a dog groomers, but it is my business that I have worked hard to establish and I want to know that anyone who I have come in and represent us, wants to be there, and they aren't just there because their parent wants them to be there. If you want me to spend my time replying and arranging a placement etc (which I am more than happy to do, but it IS extra work for me!), then I don't think it is too much to ask that a teen contacts me themselves? I know that teens have to do work experience and that the vast majority of them probably won't end up working in the sort of place where they do their placement, but a little bit of interest wouldn't go amiss, it's a good skill to learn, we dont all land our dream job from day one 🤣

Is this common across the board? I'm 38, but I feel like when I was younger, we were encouraged to do this sort of thing ourselves? I understand it more if it's a work experience placement that is arranged through school, perhaps schools are encouraging parents to seek the placements, I don't know? However if you are searching for paid part time work, surely this has to come from the applicant directly?

I appreciate that perhaps some of the applicants have SEN, but as a SEN parent myself, I would encourage my child to reach out to businesses themselves and would have a hand in guiding them. It's totally fine for parents to help, SEN or not, these are young people and the world of work is new to them, but a bit of independence is important isn't it? I absolutely love hearing from passionate young people directly, I love my job, and am always really happy to spend time speaking to young people about how to get into my industry and opportunities etc, but I want to speak to them! Email, Facebook message, website contact form enquiry, I don't care, you don't need to pick up the phone (I myself have phone anxiety, I totally get it!), but I want to know that you actually want to spend time in my business and are interested!

Maybe I'm being harsh and should review my policy of automatically saying no unless it has come from the young person directly?!

YABU- It's perfectly fine for parents to apply
YANBU- At 15/16/17, teens should be applying themselves.

I am soooo glad my parents did nothing much to help me regarding work experience etc. I was a shy kid, and still naturally a shy person. But getting out of your comfort zone because there was nobody else to do it for you massively helped build my confidence.
Sorted my own work experience, sorted part time jobs (from 14), buses to places.
I despair for young people now.
If have a shy child especially, please don't do everything for them and thinking you're helping. They need to experience everything.

I'm not asking them to disclose anything, don't be absurd. However, if they are expecting to undertake a work placement/paid employment in a business, then they should also be sending the initial e-mail to request that placement.

If however, they can't and they need specific accommodations, then while I do not need any medical information, I absolutely do need to know what those accommodations need to be, in order to ensure their safety and the safety of the live, unpredictable animals that I work with.

It’s dog grooming. The skills required to groom a dog are night and day compared to navigating the social minefield of applying for placement.

“However, if they are expecting to undertake a work placement/paid employment in a business, then they should also be sending the initial e-mail to request that placement.”

The accommodation is to not require every candidate apply independently in order to even be considered for a work placement. Your “should” is your own made up requirement that is discriminatory against certain disabilities.

I bet she was really proud and couldn’t wait to tell her mum.

You made her Mum’s day!

I feel just like you and also have a disabled daughter. It’s equal parts heart breaking and enraging.

DH employs graduates in relatively competitive training roles. He regularly gets emails from the parents of 21-23 year olds seeking work experience or job opportunities.

If a 22 year old graduate (without significant social and or learning differences) isn’t able to pick up the phone or email themselves… 😂🤦🏼‍♀️

Sorry that is bullshit of the highest order. Many people who need help with the application process are very good at working jobs.

Stephen Hawking would never have made it past primary school with the ableist attitudes displayed on here.

But the op doesn't know they are disabled.

So she isn't filtering them out.

She's just filtering out the applications from mummies for their precious babies who either don't want to work have no interest In Work or cba either way.

In favour of teens who approach her directly and clearly want to work. Are keen and have shown initiative.

Literally how good do you need to be writing emails in order to groom a dog?

But it’s extremely different to receive an email on behalf of a child with learning or social differences.

If prefaced with a well worded explanatory paragraph then that isn’t going to be discounted in the same way. I hope you find people willing to work with you to find the spaces where your daughter can contribute.

Probably the building not the loo

She should be helped by the school and there are many adaptations as to how experience of work is arranged , when additional help is required. The time in a workplace is just that, work experience, the preparation, the help for those that need it, the parents presentations, are all meant to be part of the programme. When I arranged work experience for those with physical / learning disabilities, we worked with supportive employers, parents, schools in a very different way to that with main stream.pupils. Schools are failing pupils by not following through on the whole programme of work related learning.

We had one today at work, came in with the daughter and said she wants to do work experience with us. I said to the daughter to email us and put it for the attention of the practice manager, who willhave a look at the request and get back to you. Parent said can you not get practice manager to email us instead as daughteri s too busy ?!?!? Err no, that's not how it works.

Then tell me how I manage it?! I am a small business with no employees, it's just me. Say I accept all of the emails from parents and invite all of the teens for a chat? So I end up considering 6 emails a week, for a maximum of a one week placement every 3 months for one person. How do I decide who to give it to?

Oh do pipe down. Everyone I knew at work experience age sorted their own work experience. Surely statistics state a couple should have been SEN? Also if they can't approach adults themselves they certainly can't partake it work experience!

Her process is designed to filter out students with certain disabilities. It is discriminatory.

She's just filtering out the applications from mummies for their precious babies who either don't want to work have no interest In Work or cba either way.
She doesn’t know that the DC don’t want to work or have no interest in work, she is prejudiced against it.

It doesn't take 2 mins to send a bloody email asking about a job. And dog groomers still need social skills to deal with the owners ( you know who pays) and sort appointments, order in products etc

How do you think people book a dog groom? The ability to send or reply to an email is not an unreasonable requirement.

Well you crack on and report her to God knows what.

There is always one

Why should I pipe down? Isn’t this what the country wants? Isn’t this why disability benefits are being slashed for the under 22s? So that disabled young people are encouraged to get the support they need to get work.

For most that support is going to be their parents.

Yet here is an employer that is deliberately screening out applicants for Yr10 work experience that had support because she has prejudged them as not really wanting work, lazy, incapable etc and are an immediate and automatic no.

It just goes to show that disabled kids even at yr10 work experience are being shut out of all opportunities.

Being called is different from cold calling. You should know the difference.

YANBU to expect most teens to be sufficiently confident/independent-supported to be able to make contact about a work experience placement.

It feels harder for teenagers to get work experience with vets and other animal-handling jobs these days than it was years ago, I know that was the case for one of my DCs who I think was the only Y10 student who managed to do so in their year. I absolutely sat with them as they wrote to the vet (the mum of one of their friends) because they'd not had any practice writing to someone in such a formal way, mentioning the insurance needed etc. as per the instructions from school. I think I had to show DC how to attach the forms from school to a later email with the vet but that was the extent of my involvement.

I've provided a similar level of support to my own students when they've needed to secure work experience or have applied for weekend jobs/apprenticeships. It's usually in the background although on occasions I have also contacted the employer in advance and without giving out any identifying details, have asked how flexible they are able to be about X. Having paved the way, it's meant a vulnerable student has been able to include in a (heavily supported) covering letter that they'd be grateful if any phone contact could be made Monday - Friday between 10am and 2pm when Mrs SE13 is available to offer support. For another student I was able to negotiate equal consideration at the apprenticeship interview even though they would not be dressed as formally as requested because the student was 7ft (yes, really) tall and didn't have formal trousers or shoes as they weren't required in our setting and 48 hours notice meant it wasn't possible.

It can take a huge amount of effort to hand-hold a teen into making the initial contact and it would almost certainly be easier (and definitely quicker) for a parent to do it themselves but long-term, most teens will gain more from being supported to make the initial contact from their own email address (even if it's a shared account you've helped them set up just for jobs e.g. [email protected]).

I have two disabled children but I wouldn't email on their behalf. @LoremIpsumCici I feel like you're misrepresenting the OP a bit. I don't think it's unreasonable to expect an application to come from the applicant. You can help with that application, you could basically write the thing for them. But just send it as if it's from the individual.

That's what I would do. I'd work with my kids to help them form the email and then send it, the OP seems to be fine getting an email, just wants it to appear to be from the young person. She's not saying everyone has to ring up and talk to her and she's actively said she's fine with parental help writing the application.

This is work experience, it’s not hiring an experienced person on a full wage.