Neighbour knocking door at all hours asking for help

[daisyrabir]

There is a family that have recently moved in a few doors down.
English is not the native language and the family do not speak English very well.

A few times now the older lady has knocked on my door at around 10:30pm at night asking for help.
I did open the door and helped her with her phone issue.

Its like now it’s all the time, she will just come round in the day and night asking for help.

I have young children one of whom is a newborn and don’t want her to keep knocking on my door, especially at night.

She does this to the other neighbours as well.

DP has told me to just ignore the door now.
AIBU?

Just tell her to her face you can't and won't help her anymore. If she needs that much help, she needs a permanent solution than bothering neighbours.

Why are you opening the door at 10.30 pm and not your husband? Is he working?

Anyway, I’d just ignore.

Tell her it’s far too late and you can’t help.

What a strange response? Why can't OP open the door if indeed she wants to? He doesn't want to encourage it which is fair enough considering the situation they now find themselves in.

What problems does she have at that time that she needs help with?

Have we been transported back to the 1950's?

Why strange? If our doorbell went at 10.30 and we weren’t expecting anyone, our 22 year old 6ft 5 son would answer if the caller was persistent (my husband is disabled).

I would call Adult Social services. She's becoming a nuisance to neighbours and it needs to be addressed.
Do they rent or is it their property? If rented I would contact the owner, there will be terms of their tenancy that would include not being a nuisance to neighbours or not encroaching on your right to quiet enjoyment
I agree you should not answer the door. She's not your problem.

No. See response above.

The lady will need help with how to use her phone, app’s, how to use appliances in the house, etc or sometimes just a chat.

Might be a bit out there, but does she tend to knock when the baby's been crying or the other DC has?

She might be trying to make sure you're OK or whether you would need some help.

In that case, I'd absolutely ignore.

Open the door and say “No!”

I wouldn't even go down to the door at that time - surely if she needs help, she can at least come to you in the daytime?

Stop answering the door.

Say what now? Do single parents have a spare man around just so thry can open the door? Or other people who live alone? We can't let the little woman do it

Because I dont know why? I also have adult children (even less sure what height has to do with it but they are 6' 4" and 5' 11" 🙄) but just the closest, most available person opens it.

Tell her not to call after whatever time you deem fit.
As in “ I m happy to help you when I can but not before x or after y “.

I’m always the one who goes out to investigate strange things. Never dh
my logic is I’m less threatening so it’s less likely to end badly.

Could you get a Ring doorbell or similar and just not answer your door if it's not convenient and you can see it's her? I wouldn't be answering my door at 10.30pm for that kind of thing and as a rule, I'll answer my door to anyone ringing my bell! 😂

@MrsSkylerWhite , OP didn't mention a husband.

If you don’t understand why some women might feel vulnerable opening the door to an unexpected caller at 10.30 pm, there’s no point trying to explain.

Of course height has something to do with it if the caller is potentially risky. Would have thought that was perfectly obvious.

Yes she did. He told her to ignore

Me too! But that's because DH is a lovely, gentle soul, and I, erm, am not! Anyone coming to do mischief is going to scarper pretty quick when they see me hulking at the door! 😂

Nothing OP has said suggests this is something OP should waste social services time with!

Just tell her OP. Then stop answering the door.