To regret moving DP in to my house

[JadeySmiles]

After a challenging weekend I am really starting to think I’ve made a big mistake here 😫

Background - I have been with DP for c.1.5 years, brilliant relationship, get along with each others family and similar goals for the future etc.

He moved in with me at my suggestion a couple of months ago when the tenancy on his flat was up.

I’ve been subtly asking him to contribute to more of the household chores without much uptake and this weekend I was a bit more direct in asking him to do certain things.

His response to me asking him to clean the bathroom was to blankly stare at me and say ‘I am male’. We saw friends on Sunday afternoon (another couple) and he said to my friends DH something along the lines of ‘yeah, she asked me to clean the bathroom yesterday. Not our job is it!’ and burst out laughing.

He has made what I thought were light hearted comments in the past about me being in the kitchen and that being my natural habit which I laughed off but in light of what he has said, I wonder if he was joking!

He has some annoying habit, 2 or 3 times he has made a mess of the toilet and not used the brush, leaving me to clean it up. His response is to laugh and say that I will need to get used to living with a man.

Is this really normal?! I feel I’ve potentially ruined our relationship by moving him in too early..

Come off it. You KNOW that isn't normal and if you don't know, get bloody help.

Get him out. Today.

This is a deal breaker.
It is not normal.
Get him out asap.
The longer he stays the worse things will get.

What was his flat like?

Another Prince amongst men.

Tell him he needs to find a new hovel and a cleaner.

It's not about being male. He is a sexist pig. My husband would never behave like that or use his sex as a excuse to behave a certain way.

Ugh get that bastard out asap. Is there somewhere else he could go to immediately? I imagine he's got a doting mother somewhere. If not maybe he could go and make a mess in his friend's house.

Honestly, by this time tomorrow he'd be gone if it were me. Pack up his things while he's at work and tell him to fuck off out of your sight.

Wait till he gets back and keep it simple.

"I'm female. Not my job to house you, is it? Get out. Now"

It's a bloody good job you moved him in and found out what he's really like. Surely you can't be considering continuing the relationship now??

Revolting. I would not tolerate that from anyone!

I need to know what his flat was like and who cleaned it (him/mum/cleaner??) and did you ever encounter his mess and skid marks before you moved him in.

Regardless, make him leave. It will never improve.

Oh. My. God.

Get rid. Imagine your life in 10 years if you stay with this misogynistic prick.

What a twat. Tell him you're going to find yourself a real man, one who does 50/50 with everything. Youre not living with a mysogonistic arsehole thanks

You are in Andrew Tate territory.

Straight in the bin.

You know full well it's not normal.

Quite how you've managed 1.5 years without discovering you're dating a knuckle dragger, is beyond me.

Move him out swiftly.

‘I am male’.

"It's become apparent in a VERY SHORT SPACE OF TIME since you moved in that we are not compatible, the relationship is over effective immediately and I want you to move out. You're a dimlo and I cannot spend my life with someone who is a misogynistic twat. You have a week. Find somewhere to live, even if its a hotel, it's not my problem, the locks will be changed next Tuesday. "

Wrote it for you.

Kick him out. What a Neanderthal,

Is this real?!

He showing you how he really thinks about you. Ignore it at your peril.

More red flags than a circus 🎪
Get him out!
Awful behaviour.

OP, you're worried you moved him in too early?

How do you think moving him in later would have helped with his revolting habits and equally revolting attitudes?

Move him out, pronto.

Disgusting attitude. Time to evict him from your life, not just your house.

Better you’ve found out what he’s really like now, I’d imagine if you tell him it’s over he will say he will do it but it won’t last. He’s made his feelings clear it’s a woman’s job- tell him he needs to leave tomorrow - not your problem where he goes

I didn’t go to his flat too often, if I did it was usually on a Friday after work and I know his Mum went round most Friday afternoons as he works a half day every Friday due to a condensed week. It was always freshly clean in terms of hoovering and the bathroom etc and he tells me he did it after work as that was his routine. I’m starting to think it was probably his Mum!

I've lived with plenty of men. They can all clean a toilet. Current pre teen is a bit slack on the "leave it as you found it" front but no way on Earth would he respond to being pulled up on it by bringing his sex into it.