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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I hate having two kids

338 replies

itwouldbefineif · 14/04/2025 18:15

Hate it. Hate it. All of my friends were one and done and I sort of wish I’d done the same. Except then I wouldn’t have one of them. It would be fine if I was a SAHM and I only had one at a time but I can’t do that.

OP posts:
MusicMakesItAllBetter · 17/04/2025 14:43

itwouldbefineif · 14/04/2025 18:22

He has been doing so @OoooopsUpsideYourHead although I had to read him the riot act not so long ago. But he isn’t here much during the week due to work. Weekends we tend to have a child each but I suppose that means there’s no break, whereas once DH having a child meant a break for me and vice versa.

My future just feels full of squabbles and arguments and tale telling tbh.

Newsflash.... It will be because that's what siblings do.

Im sorry you're not enjoying both of your children.

It is hard.
We never used to get any date time.
Now we use someone we knows daughter who our DC really like it we do go out which is rare!!

Yes life is easier with one (especially as both of mine are ND as am I) and yes they're stressful at times but you learn to adapt and pick/choose your battles.

The joy and love these little people have for you .... Your their while world!!

I hope you can find peace in your head x

GreenYodaFace · 18/04/2025 18:25

I mean my aunty tells me to have another child incase my only dies. People have always got opinions! Hope you're OK op

Taytayslayslay · 18/04/2025 18:31

itwouldbefineif · 14/04/2025 18:15

Hate it. Hate it. All of my friends were one and done and I sort of wish I’d done the same. Except then I wouldn’t have one of them. It would be fine if I was a SAHM and I only had one at a time but I can’t do that.

Mine are 6&7 and it's still difficult but somewhat better now. You've almost made it to school age lol, trust me it improves. Mine fight and act like they despise each other 99% of the time and it's always MUMMYYYYY. But my sons autistic/has verbal apraxia which makes it difficult too lol. You'll get there, I promise. I wasn't sure id make it out the toddler trenches but we are all still here!

mainecooncatonahottinroof · 19/04/2025 02:07

DepressingMumLife234 · 16/04/2025 22:34

@mainecooncatonahottinroof there are agencies. Plenty of them, at least in London.

Show quote history

Yeah right, London. And everyone's in London, sure!

There are no such agencies where I live. Expand your mind a little.

mainecooncatonahottinroof · 19/04/2025 02:09

Sofiewoo · 16/04/2025 22:36

You’re being ridiculous, a babysitter is someone who takes on childcare responsibilities on an ad hoc basis. If you wanted to find one it would be incredibly easy with a quick search in your area.
“I wouldn’t know how to find that” is such a cop out in 2025.
You’re posting on mumsnet, I’m sure you’re perfectly capable of downloading a babysitting app.

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Do you have an actual clue how people live?!

I suppose you are in London too! 🙄

mainecooncatonahottinroof · 19/04/2025 02:12

DepressingMumLife234 · 17/04/2025 02:19

@mainecooncatonahottinroof @PyongyangKipperbang I'm sorry for being an immigrant in the UK and only ever living in London. Is everyone born or living in London mega privileged? If so, sounds like you need to move to London.

I've just done a 30 second Google search for babysitting agencies in Newcastle and I found 5. I couldn't be arsed to read further. There are babysitters everywhere. If you don't want to use them, fine. But it's not some London specific benefit.

Show quote history

Nah I've done London and it's not for me.

Sofiewoo · 19/04/2025 06:50

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lifehappens12 · 19/04/2025 14:07

My boys are now 6 and 4 and much less fighting and now play together.

we are away this weekend and only but of toddler equipment is a sippy cup!

it gets easier

mainecooncatonahottinroof · 19/04/2025 14:38

This reply has been deleted

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Thanks for the compliment. I enjoy your posts too.

You must have led a very sheltered life.

mrssunshinexxx · 19/04/2025 14:42

We’ve got 3 under 4 and it’s really tough every other weekend one of us takes all of them unless it’s over babies nap time for 2 hours it makes SUCH a difference

Emilyjayne942 · 19/04/2025 14:47

It’s tough when they’re that age. I’ve got three who are now 7, 8 and 13 and it’s a lot easier. They do still bicker but not nearly as much as they used to. When the little ones were 2 and 3 it was hellish some days. Hang in there, I always said I’d never miss their younger years but I really do. You’ve got this. We also have no family around to help on either side. It didn’t happen much when they were younger but we now can have nice family meals out and trips out without it nearly ending in divorce.

Skybluepinky · 19/04/2025 19:03

Sounds like u need a parenting class if u can’t cope with 2 children, speak to your GP.

Janicchoplin · 19/04/2025 19:15

This troubles me. Do you have postnatal depression?
The reason your post troubles me, is you are truly not happy having two children.
So what does this mean for those children. Children are sensitive to their parents moods. They look to you for guidance and instruction.
If you hold these thoughts then they will come out in you even if you try really hard for them not too.
So the importance here is to perhaps seek therapy to work on where this is coming from.
It's only a thought and you can take or leave it.

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