Mum won't accept I don't want someone seeing my child so now I've said my mum can't either.

[RachCmomma]

For context I don't have a great relationship with my mum anyway.

I have fallen out with my brother and SIL and in retaliation they made a malicious social services report accusing me of physical abuse of my 1 year old. The police checked him over, spoke to childminder and his father ect and it was un founded.

It transpired that SIL had sent social services doctored photos of my child and a photo of him having a bruise on his eye- luckily I had a video of his injury happening as it was his first walk outside and he got too excited and fell....
Anyway understandably I have said I don't want the around my child since this happened.

My mum keeps manipulating me into letting my child see them- for example inviting them out on days when she has my son I've made it clear thst I do not want this to happen under Amy circumstances.
I've told her she needs to respect my decision and stop trying to guilt trip me into doing what she wants.

She has my son on a Tuesday and today she rang me to tell me she's planned a family day out tomorrow at a park...but SIL amd her child will be there...I've said no.. she's started shouting at me and we've had a row I've now said that as she clearly can't respect my boundaries and she isn't willing to tell them what they did was disgusting she won't be having my child on her own, as I don't trust her not to do it anyway.

Obviously now I feel awful and she's making me out to be the vilan
.. what do people think?

YANBU.

Protect yourself and your child.

I can't imagine what you've been through. Take back control and go no contact. Do not engage. Start fresh. Do not look back.

Life may seem tough right now but keep going... it will all work out in the end.

You're doing the right thing, absolutely. This is what you NEED to do to safeguard your son. Your family is not safe for you or your son to be around. Good for you.

I have a narc mother and sister OP. I hear you. Keep your distance.

Check out Dr Ramani ‘It’s Not You’ if you haven’t read it already or watch her you tube videos.

I’m surprised your brother and SIL didn’t go to jail for lying to the police about child abuse.

Does she get away with doctoring photo? The world gone mad. Definitely no contact with any of them which is sad but needed

Good luck - I suspect you might find it easier getting yourself back together when these people are out of your life!

So sorry, from my experience police don't follow up on malicious abuse allegations.

You are right to go NC with your mum - she might be nice to your DC now, but very likely to turn on him when he's older.

Your SIL is an evil cow - your brother too for supporting her. Your life will be better without any of them in it - no tip toeing around their feelings trying not to set them off.

I've just finished reading " you are not the problem " as recommended to me by my therapist and it just made me really angry...particularly cause a lot of my "personality " is a trauma response.

Yea nothing happened

Sounds like some trauma informed/focused therapy could be helpful?

You are worth more than this.

Yea...I'm having counselling at the min...waiting to see clin psych to asses for complex ptsd and then 3 year wait list for therapy ....

But I feel like step 1 is removing myself from this triggering bullshit. Xxx

Don’t feel bad, you are not the villain here.
Well done on setting boundaries with your mother and you are doing the right thing by not allowing her to see your child on her own as you obviously cannot trust her.

I would change all the locks in your house OP, these people are dangerous I wouldn't trust them not to have had copies of keys made when they had access to your home.

They all sound awful. You're well rid.

I'd go NC with both. No way should you put up with that

I’d feel exactly the same.

YANBU @RachCmomma, not in the slightest. All of them sound absolutely vile. There should be a legal route to deal with these people who make totally malicious complaints out of spite.

Why on earth would your brother and sister in law do that? It's horrible.

Yeah it ism there's no justification for it. We had a bad falling out - I had to get them removed from my home- they'd been here months without paying rent and being awful to me. Came to a head one day with them both screaming at me in front of my child so I called the police and they did that

YANBU. What they did was truly appalling OP - such premeditated maliciousness on their part could have had devastating consequences for you and your DC - it's simply unforgiveable and your decision to stop your "D"M having your DC is absolutely the right response.
Re. them suffering no consequences for their actions, you could make a complaint to the police as you have evidence from Social Services confirming that the photo's were doctored and what they did could be covered by the Malicious Communications Act 1988, particularly since they did it "with the intention to cause distress or harm". The Act makes it a crime to send a communication that is indecent or grossly offensive, a threat, or conveys information that is false and known or believed to be false by the sender, where the purpose is to cause distress or anxiety. Even if it comes to nothing OP, it would put the wind up them when the police contact them - see how they like it!

That’s horrific behaviour from them. Imagine going as far as doctoring child abuse images ffs

Well done for taking control and protecting you and your child. Your mum will eventually fall out with those nasty fuckers.

Thanks for this xxx

Jeez. This.
stay well away from all of them.

I agree with @AngelicKaty that you should go to the police and have SS back you up.

I am really shocked this happened and I'm so sorry that it did. I think that you're vulnerable and they have not only been taking advantage of you, they are trying to actively hurt you and damage your mental health.

Not sure if this is possible, but you might consider getting a restraining order on all of them, based on previous behaviors.

Can you get advice and support from the SS?

Creating fake photos to shop you to social services isn't just a family row, it's a serious attack. If your mum can't see that and keep your child away from the perps, she'll have to stop looking after him. What a shame for both of you.