People that shout "THANK YOU!" to those that don't say it

[tvchoice]

Why do you do so?
Personally, if I hold a door or let someone through and they don't acknowledge and thank me, I don't let it bother me and simply get on with my day. The reason for this is I quite honestly couldn't care less how a total stranger behaves towards me, within reason of course, because they are exactly that. A stranger that means nothing to me.
Therefore, if they don't say thank you, it doesn't matter enough for me to need to react to it, but for many others, they have a different mindset. Help me understand! Why is this?
Surely someone would need to be important to you for their behaviour to affect you enough to react to it?

I think 'you're welcome' is a good response.

would it suit you better to let a door slam in your face instead? this thread is hilariously contradictive… some are moaning that you don’t like being ‘called out’ or told how to behave as grown adults when not having to acknowledge others yet you think it is fine to think someone (a stranger) can hold open a door for you without a simple thank you… WOW … absolutely astonishing… my take on the people who are aggrieved at having to be courteous in everyday society would be you simply don’t like being called out on your rudeness as you then feel angry… well from the other POV that is exactly how the polite people in society feel when impolite people feel the need to be ill-mannered… i’ll say it again it costs nothing to be courteous

if you stop and think you will realise the people who don’t say thank you to acts of kindness may be thinking well “if you can’t beat em join em”
Rude people start it so polite people finish it… same as 🤷‍♀️

I mainly do this to my kids

"THANKS MUM!"

I used to….

then about a year ago, I was on the other side.

I had just received a life changing phone call when I was out one day. Honestly it though me for six, I couldn’t even take in my surroundings, and I desperately was trying to get to my car to get home.

a man must of waited for me as I was walking down some steps in the multi story . I stopped half way down for a moment- there wasn’t a reason why that I can remember, then I carried on going forward and must of passed him .

I didn’t even Realise he was there until he started shouting about ‘rude fat cows not saying anything when someone’s being polite, even when they had to wait for me to come down the stairs’

to me it came out of the blue, and It seemed very scary how angry and shouty he was.

I haven’t been in the multi story since actually

I would never knowingly not say thank you to someone, I’m too much of a people pleaser in the first place.

I think what I took away from it was we have no idea what is happening in those few seconds for the other person, and we hold the door to be good people- not to be presented with a medal and undying gratitude for it

Because manners matter. Like it or not, we exist in society, and those rules of conduct are important. It would be sad if everyone just did exactly what they fancied without paying any attention at all to others.

I get annoyed when I see Facebook posts for a local shop asking "have you got this" no please, I can just about ignore the lack of a question mark.

Considering thank you or ta is one of the first words babies usually learn it's obvious that those that don't say it are just ignorant cunts.

I'm sorry that happened to you.
Like a previous poster mentioned her son, sometimes there are unforeseen reasons why a person may 'seem' impolite.

Because it's an important part of our culture. Honestly I don't understand how anyone could not say thank you. Likewise, people who do not queue - that blows my mind.

Manners are important and are one of the most effortless things in the world, yet with a huge positive effect.

I'm a "You're welcome" type. Basic manners and courtesy cost nothing and they oil the wheels of society.

If people have been kind to you and then called you out for being rude, do better. Some people are just ill mannered, rude and ignorant.

a mum last week in the play ground shouted thank you aggressively as she was holding the gate ,
it is on a spring so she was into the playground holding it from slamming into people behind if you understand what I mean

several people were passing in the gate at the time not just me and she had kids around her as did I , I was mid conversation with mine as I passed the gate and her

stopping my conversation and saying thank you would have been a bit unnecessary in the circumstances ie lots of people , everyone talking , all she had done was walk through the gate

i am not sure if she was shouting it at me , someone else or her kids , I wanted to ask her if it was aimed at me but thought to let it go

it was excessively aggressive given the fact she didn’t actually need to hold the gate she could have let it spring back and one of us passing through would have caught it

its not the first time someone has aggressively expressed their need for thanks in a way that is so unpleasant that it made me wish they hadn’t bothered and I’d would have been much happier to have the door shut in my face

I assumed she was having a bad day / hormones I was but scared of her as she looked like she wanted a fight

don’t be that knob !

When I worked in a shop I had a customer every day who got his shopping and then just say "bag", and every time I would say please and eventually he started saying it. I treat you with respect and I expect you to do the same.

I have been known to say loudly “Love You” if somebody lets a door shut in me or doesn’t thank me for holding the door for them!

If you actually had decent manners, you would recognise that doing the polite thing matters whether or not you get credit for it, and that loudly correcting someone who doesn't give the recognition you seem desperate for is unbelievably crass, terrible manners, and much more about your own ego than a point of principle. Of course people should say thank you, but you should do the right thing to do the right thing, not for thanks.

I've had this from people I've said thank you to but because I haven't bellowed across the shop or wherever they haven't heard me.

I think it's arseholic tbh even if someone didn't say thanks.

Because the dwindling manners in the world are the thin end of the wedge.

The world is all very me-focussed these days and that's kind of the problem.

What was once a civilised society where people were polite to one another is now an elbows-out me first cess pool where people don't care about others and rudeness is on the incline.
If you don't call it out, where is it going to end?

When I was in my mid 20s I got a taxi late at night from the station after coming back from work. It was late, no one was around and it was pouring with rain. I jumped in the back..driver said "where to" so I responded with my street. He just sat there. I felt really awkward and after what felt like an age he said "you need to say please".

I felt embarrassed and shamed about it for a long time because of my poor manners but now I look back in rage about his shitty power play. I was young, vulnerable and essentially stuck alone in a car with a strange man who decided to get a kick out of pulling me up on manners when I was already stressed. I have no doubt in my mind that he would not have tried that with a 6ft burly man!

Because it's basic manners and I cannot stand rudeness. It's really not difficult to say thank you is it?

"I'm sorry I didn't catch that"
"I didn't say anything"
Oh, I thought you said thank you."

This!

That was just horrible.
There is a time and a place to make a point...he was just a twat.

Cyclists on the tow path, when I’ve got the dog out the way and they don’t say thanks it drives me nuts.

It isn’t a cycle path. I’ve made the dog sit at the side of the path so you can pass safely. Say thanks ffs - who brought you up?

So I shout “you’re welcome” after them.

I say ‘you’re welcome’ as if I think they have said thank you. It’s the bit of a passive aggressive legacy from my mum that I can’t quite let go of.

Are you my sister?