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Original poster

Best friend husband unfriended me on Facebook

269 replies

Bernie54 · 12/04/2025 00:28

To be offended that my best friends husband has unfriended me on Facebook. I only noticed by chance. Best friend says don’t take it personal ? But we have been best friends since 14, we are now both 54….they now live quite remotely about 5 hours away, so I don’t see her. I just find it odd behaviour. Should I care or even be bothered ?

OP posts:
rwalker · 12/04/2025 05:49

He does want to see what you post
Your not remotely close
he’s had a clear out of “friends “
you sound very invested in SM no doubt stuff from you is popping up up all the time

HappiestSleeping · 12/04/2025 05:55

Whocanbelieveit · 12/04/2025 00:45

Why would you care if your best friends husband is your friend on Facebook? Also at 54 why would you care if anyone was your friend on Facebook? I thought only young people are bothered about how many friends they have on Facebook.

I don't think young people use Facebook that much now, it's mainly for us oldies.

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 05:57

PishPish · 12/04/2025 01:36

I think it’s weird to have your friend’s husband as a FB friend if you’re not also close, and weirder still to mind that he’s unfriended you. Who even notices this stuff?

“Weird”? Why?

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 06:01

Only complete wankers delete people who they haven’t actively fallen out with. It’s so “Look at meeeee! I’m far too important to just scroll past an update I don’t like! My time is just soooo precious!”

Be glad you’re rid of him, OP. He sounds like an utter cockface.

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 06:02

Eastertidings · 12/04/2025 03:25

You're a total drama llama OP. Person who only had you on FB in the first place to be polite, who now never sees you, has unfriended you. It's a non-issue and there's nothing odd about it. FB isn't used as a popularity contest for everyone. Not everyone wants 2740 friends on their list. Some people only keep actual friends who are part of their life, on there. My own list never goes above about 100, I weed people out each time I leave a hobby group or workplace etc. As well as a regular cull of people I used to be friends with but aren't in contact with them any more. Which doesn't mean we've fallen out, just they're no longer part of my life, so why do they need to be on my Facebook?

@Tereseta if you confront your unfriender you'll look like an insane weirdo. There's nothing to confront. Literally nothing. Except your own messed up insecurity levels. With a therapist.

FB is a tool, people will use it however best suits them. Why unfriend someone? Because I don't like what they post.
Because they're no longer part of my life.
Because I don't exist to fuss over others protecting their fragile egos by keeping them on my page forever even if I don't need them there.
Because when I want to see what a friend is upto or send them a message, I don't want to wade through a list of 1500 people I never contact in order to find the one I do want.

Edited

Case in point.

user1492757084 · 12/04/2025 06:11

He can always ask to his wife if he's ever interested in what you post on facebook.
Or you can send any special message via her.

Do you know where they live?
You could always post him an invitation, birthday card etc.

LillyPJ · 12/04/2025 06:18

Don't be bothered by it.You don't know why he did it - maybe an accident, maybe he wanted to just keep a few, maybe he wanted to post stuff he thought you, or others, wouldn't be interested in... You're still friends with your best friend so just carry on as normal. Nothing's changed in the real world for you.

KhakiOrca · 12/04/2025 06:54

If you often interact with him then it's weird to unfriend you, so maybe his wife doesn't like it.
Or you post stuff he doesn't like.

nomas · 12/04/2025 06:56

As they live remotely, do you ever even see him or speak to him? When was the time you spoke to him?

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 12/04/2025 07:20

School holidays. I think the OP meant 14 not 54...

AgnesX · 12/04/2025 07:24

My DH had a big cull of FB friends. He says most of his friends aren't on it and he doesn't need to have friends of friends.

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 12/04/2025 07:28

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 06:01

Only complete wankers delete people who they haven’t actively fallen out with. It’s so “Look at meeeee! I’m far too important to just scroll past an update I don’t like! My time is just soooo precious!”

Be glad you’re rid of him, OP. He sounds like an utter cockface.

🤣🤣

CautiousLurker01 · 12/04/2025 07:30

Maybe he decided to prune FB to list only be his own closer personal friends and family? Maybe he thinks it’s weird to follow women who he really just knows via his wife or the kids. Maybe they’ve had a row about a woman he followed and he’s unfollowed lots of women accordingly because their marriage is important and their private difficulties are none of your business. Men use FB differently to women: my own DH has no social media at all because he despises the lack of privacy, the way people parade their children before an unmanaged public for likes/approval - without their consent - and the political, social and psychological discontent it feeds.

I, personally, deleted everyone from mine a year or so ago - all the mum contacts from school etc, everyone I have not seen since before covid and, yes, even my entire family, because I was fed up with the constant unsolicited political messages and posts (many of which made me rethink those friendship and family relationships entirely as I was quite shocked on their positions on culture wars issues and their lack of nuanced understanding of various wars/global conflict issues, we didn’t agree and I didn’t need to know about it). I decided that my family and friends have my number and my email - if they want to communicate with me, share family photos - SEE me - they can get in touch properly and not adopt the lazy process of tagging me in pictures and posts that include their fricking postman or the town and neighbourhood watch association.

Now FB is just a place where I follow and connect with people who are in my profession and post their updates there. Like linked in, but without the professional posturing. Oh, and puppy/spaniel organisations for the cute pics.

BlondiePortz · 12/04/2025 07:31

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 06:01

Only complete wankers delete people who they haven’t actively fallen out with. It’s so “Look at meeeee! I’m far too important to just scroll past an update I don’t like! My time is just soooo precious!”

Be glad you’re rid of him, OP. He sounds like an utter cockface.

Is this genuine? A joke?

cakeandteaandcake · 12/04/2025 07:31

KewTitles · 12/04/2025 06:01

Only complete wankers delete people who they haven’t actively fallen out with. It’s so “Look at meeeee! I’m far too important to just scroll past an update I don’t like! My time is just soooo precious!”

Be glad you’re rid of him, OP. He sounds like an utter cockface.

You never have a clearout?

I’ve deleted people because I never see or speak to them, eg people I met on a friend’s hen do 15 years ago really didn’t still need to be on there.

Espresso25 · 12/04/2025 07:32

He probably doesn’t enjoy your posts.

SheridansPortSalut · 12/04/2025 07:34

Oh for heavens sake, act your age. You sound like a teenager. It's highly unlikely to be personal.

wordywitch · 12/04/2025 07:34

Justyouwaitandseeagain · 12/04/2025 00:42

My husband often clears out Facebook and leaves WhatsApp chats. He seems to have no concern for what people might think, he only focuses on what he wants / or doesn't want to see in his newsfeed.

I’m the same and couldn’t care less what other people think of it. If people are mistaking Facebook for real life friendship then that’s their problem to deal with. I enjoy my annual cull 😄

RitaAndFrank · 12/04/2025 07:35

I deleted FB years ago because of stuff like this. Despite people saying ‘it’s only social media’ and then probably proceeding to use it as one of their main means of socialising these days, it does take thought and effort to delete people and there does have to be a motive behind it. I’m with you, op, it is unnerving.

the same happened to me once - my best friend’s dh deleted me. I asked her why, she gave a shifty answer back, turned out she was having major jealousy issues due to problems in their marriage and she didn’t like him being friends with me as well as a few others. I think he actually ‘refriended’ me a couple of years later.

Anyway, head fucks like that are some of the reasons I left!

GloriaHeart · 12/04/2025 07:35

Yeah to be fair OP some of the comments on here are a bit unkind. I’d feel a bit put out.

I’ve got someone I dislike on my FB. I’ve considered unfriending but instead I just never interact with her posts at all even if she comments underneath my status

I don’t put particularly personal stuff on there so no one knows really what’s going on in my life

MummaMummaMumma · 12/04/2025 08:01

Are you actually good friends with him also? Talk with him on FB?
If not, why does it matter?

Idontgiveashitanymore · 12/04/2025 08:03

Get over yourself. It’s their choice who to have on social media .

Owl55 · 12/04/2025 08:05

I realized a little while ago that Facebook generated friend requests not the person I thought was asking! I did wonder why certain people would ask as we had nothing in common , maybe he just not interested and decluttering so many post , don’t take it personally .

Spirallingdownwards · 12/04/2025 08:10

Owl55 · 12/04/2025 08:05

I realized a little while ago that Facebook generated friend requests not the person I thought was asking! I did wonder why certain people would ask as we had nothing in common , maybe he just not interested and decluttering so many post , don’t take it personally .

Facebook doesn't send friend requests though. It does make suggestions such as People you may know but not actual friend requests.

OP have you taken to doing something not to his taste such as reposting Reform crap or about crafting or loads of keep fit or trasnphobic stuff. It may just be as simple as he doesn't need your interest in his face all the time.

If any friend gets overly Trump/Farage/GB Newsy on FB then they are deleted.

HoldYourHat · 12/04/2025 08:11

As much as people say, it’s just social media get over it, act your age, it’s not real life - whatever. Social media has replaced these things to some extent for many people, so someone you know who freezes you out is just the same as if they snubbed you in the street.

Because there is not much more detail in your post, it is hard to know why. Maybe ask your friend and take it from there.