To think it’s fair to judge people on their appearance in certain situations?

[ThisQuickLemonPoster]

If someone shows up to a job interview in a stained hoodie or if a teacher is overweight and unkempt, it does affect how seriously I take them. AIBU to think “don’t judge a book by its cover” only goes so far?

if a teacher is overweight

Does weight impact their ability to teach?

Fair enough turning up to an interview in dirty clothes, but how does weight impact the ability to be in academia (unless it's sports)

YANBU to think that someone should look their best for a job interview, but YABVU to judge someone for a job based on their weight. It is not like they can do anything about it as prep for the interview like they can with finding smart clothing et.

I'm an overweight teacher and I might look a bit frazzled sometimes because my appearance means nothing to me and I like to focus on my job. If you ever implied to me that my weight had any impact on my teaching, I'd point out how uneducated you are.

Judging a teacher for their weight?! Wtf?!
Body size is not the same as a stained hoodie.

YABU to lump overweight in with unkempt. Being overweight is not a character flaw or a personality problem.

Yabu to judge someone on their size.

Fully agree. I was just thinking about this today. Recruitment for a large insurance company where I was a manager, colleague and I interviewed a chap who was borderline on being successful. I voted no as he'd not shaved or polished his shoes...we are talking university graduate not 16 year old here

Personally I like to make sure I am the best dressed man in the room as it gives me a physiological edge in business situations. I look wealthy (most clothes bought from charity shops) and confident.

I would not be happy if a teacher looks like a tramp.

I am currently working for a funeral director and it shocks me how many men don't even own a pair of trousers...your mum's died, go to a charity shop or buy something cheap from Primark or Amazon...clearly you don't have any self respect or respect for others

One of my most memorable teachers was an art one. She was a large lady that only ever wore what looked like black sacks, had thick black eyeliner and was channelling Robert Smith in terms of her hair. I could never decide if it was lots of backcombing and hairspray, or she stuck her finger in a socket every morning.
Bloody amazing teacher though.

I get where you’re coming from, and no, I don’t think weight alone affects someone’s ability to teach. But if a teacher (or anyone in a professional setting) looks consistently unkempt - like dishevelled, poorly presented, etc. it can come across as lacking care or authority, which does affect perception.

The point I was trying to make was more about the impression someone gives in a role that involves influence, leadership, or public-facing responsibility. It’s not about policing bodies, it’s about overall presentation and professionalism, which does matter, rightly or wrongly.

Stains: YANBU
Weight: YABU

Unkempt and overweight? No, why would I judge a professional qualified teacher based on their clothing.

I’d personally prefer to employ someone who knows the difference between physiological and psychological.

That last paragraph is upsetting and unnecessary.
If you work in the funeral industry, then you absolutely should not be judging your clients at all. You are in the wrong job. Seriously.

The last funeral I went to was my grandad's and hardly anyone was suited up. He would not have wanted anyone to look like their were going to court for his final send off.

Everyone judges everyone, OP. It’s both an unconscious and conscious process, so I don’t think it’s unfair to judge, as we naturally do it
anyway. Allowing your judgements to limit how open you are to learning more about an individual is quite ignorant as there’s more to people than a stained hoodie or their size, obviously. Hence the saying, don’t judge a book by its cover.

She sounds fabulous! And very similar to my drama teacher who was batshit, but brilliant.

If I can manage to teach from a wheelchair, I'm pretty sure the amount of fat on my body won't be an issue.

I knew this was going to be about weight.

Thin people can be disheveled too. Also rich people. Actually some of the richest people I know often wear the shabbiest clothes because they just don’t feel the need to impress and they want to be comfortable. Even if that jumper has holes in it.

How about, and this is a crazy idea, you judge people on their merit to do a job? Not their weight or appearance.

Weight shouldn't come into it fullstop.
I'd also love to know how well groomed you'd be after wrangling 20+ 5-8 year olds all day

The most wealthy people I've ever met were scruffy as fuck, as was their mansion. The bloke wore trousers held up by a bit of string and his car was absolutely stinking, as it was usually full of muddy labradors. They didn't care what people thought of them because they didn't need to.

@ThisQuickLemonPoster "But if a teacher (or anyone in a professional setting) looks consistently unkempt - like dishevelled, poorly presented, etc. it can come across as lacking care or authority, which does affect perception."
Why would you think an overweight person has to be "unkempt, dishevelled, poorly presented"? One of my friend's is an overweight maths teacher. I have never seen her looking unkempt, she's very well put together and tells me I should make more of an effort sometimes 😅. But maybe I don't have to because I'm slim 🙄.

Yup

if they’re looking after my children
if they’re driving my children
if they cutting / highlighting my hair
if they are doing any kind of beauty appointment
any fitness class instructor or pt

You’re right - being overweight doesn’t automatically mean someone is unkempt or unprofessional. That wasn’t what I was trying to say and I should’ve phrased it more carefully. I was trying to point out that in some settings, presentation can influence perception but I fully agree that someone can be bigger and be incredibly polished, stylish and put together.

Thanks for calling that out… your friend sounds fab and you’ve made a fair point.

YABU because the two examples given are completely different.

Showing up to a job interview in a stained hoodie? I wouldn’t “judge” exactly but I would think that this person doesn’t know how to dress for a job interview. But I used to recruit in the manufacturing sector so pretty much anything goes there.

A teacher being overweight? Something like 64% of adults in the UK are overweight, so it seems
odd to “judge” anyone on something that is normal for the majority of people.

Weight sure as heck comes in to if they’re a dietician or nutritionist or PT or slimming world leader! Or indeed a childminder

You sound very shallow. One of the most inspirational teacher I had was overweight and he cared more about his students than having a sharp suit.
And context is important for the interviewee in a stained hoodie. It is possible that it was the only top they had, something could have happened on the way to the interview anything could have caused it.
What matters is how people behave not what they look like.

Your teacher example is bloody odd op