Gender and pronouns

[Wyki]

Before I start, the daily mail and other papers can all fuck off

I’m prepared to be flamed for this as I’ve been here long enough to know how it all works but….

aibu to tell my son he can’t have his partner over any more

It’s a new relationship. My son is 21 and the new partner is 18

He barely works and is consequently on a low salary however he does help me with childcare (that I pay a minimal amount for)

the new partner is a very petite pink haired “girl” that does ballet and dance but uses the pronoun he/him

my 11 year old daughter is finding it confusing and asked if her brother is gay. I replied with “no because the partner is very feminine and is a girl despite the pronouns” (I couldn’t care less if he was gay, sexuality isn’t important)

So am I being unreasonable in saying the partner doesn’t come over as it’s just too weird and I don’t want that example being set for my daughter

Yanbu

Bunch of sheep, social contagion.

Attention.

Gaslighting women and girls to deny their eyes and lived experiences for a misogynistic cosplay is NOT respecting the choices of women and girls.

And poll after poll shows that this 'fad' is a dying breed, @menopausalfart . The longer it goes on, the more people are aware of the dangerous misogyny and deep harm it does to women and girls and disapprove of it. The feminists are winning. In 20 years time the Sociologists will look back at this time as an era of misogynistic madness.

Yes I agree that the future will be much kinder to women and girls as the hateful misogynistic cult you champion is in it's death throes, thanks to the hard work of dedicated feminists fighting the good fight.

This exactly.

@menopausalfart I know a few people that have decided to modify their bodies to alleviate their mental distress. Two of them I’ll lay money on them being devastated at their decisions in 2 years max (they’ve gone quiet so maybe already do), one has ruined his health and marriage and definitely regrets his decisions and the others seem reasonably happy for now.

I grew up in the 70s and 80s where ‘gender bending’ was cool and fun but everyone understood that the way they dressed or did their hair had no bearing on their sex and in many circumstances that is the only important factor. Now we have regressed to a terrible place where young girls think that cutting their hair and taking hormones is an acceptable way of dealing with the trials of growing up and specifically for some, the attention of men.

Perpetuating that as an acceptable route is not kind or sustainable, just as giving men who like to think of themselves as women the run of women’s spaces, sports and bodies and bullying and attacking anyone uncomfortable with that is not kind either.

I’m sorry your relative didn’t make it but ‘acceptance’ that people can change sex is not the solution for any part of society.

If that person got the psychological help they needed, this needn't have happened. That is why your support for this dangerous cult harms them. Not helps. You might mean well that you are on the wrong side of history and you are fighting to cause permanent physical harm for a mental condition, and also remove the hard won rights to single sex spaces feminists fought for. You have no understanding whatsoever that you're the bad guy here - without even realising it.

Wouldn't it be much more genuinely accepting to stress that there is no 'right' way to be male or female.

This is what the women's Lib era pushed for and parents in the 80s and 90s. Also Bowie, Prince, all the hair bands and the men in makeup, but STILL knew they were male. We have regressed. If a boy likes to play with dolls and wear glitter he is told he was 'born in the wrong body'. It's child abuse.

Whatever happened to Body Positivity? And there being no 'right' way to be a boy or a girl? We've regressed so far and undone all the progressive work of the generations that went before us.

Exactly. That is precisely why Stonewall targeted schools to indoctrinate the kids and enable activist teachers to impose rules to prevent any dissent.

We have to give it to Stonewall and the activist - they have been very clever. Imagine the good they could have done if they used their expertise and influence for a positive cause!

This is going to cost us £100s of millions to fix. Imagine all the lawsuits from the kids who have been medically harmed by these people.

Exactly, it seems extraordinary to me how much we've regressed on this issue. When I was growing up there was so much more acceptance of gender non-conformity, without anyone planting ideas in children's heads about being 'born in the wrong body' and needing drugs and surgery to 'fix' them.

It makes a difference because her religious beliefs would make her particularly uncomfortable around men in single sex spaces.

And @Couleur I'm not sure what you were trying to insinuate with that deflection from the actual point of my post but I can assure you that it's not me discriminating against women of religious minorities.

In your world view Muslim women and women of other religions who cannot be in spaces with men due to their beliefs are particularly impacted/ discriminated against.

Their needs are ignored.

I find the concept of women's toilets being a place where people have to change their clothes outside of the stalls all the time

no one said that

no one said that people wash their moon cups out ‘all the time’
or leak baby milk ‘all the time’
or have a messy period ‘all the time’

or anything else ‘all the time’

just that it can happen and people have seen it happen or its happened to them

I wouldn't want this delusional nonsense in my house.

You said that the argument in respect of women having a miscarriage might be a valid one, or something along those lines, didn't you?

What does that mean in reality?

Does that mean you think women who are having a miscarriage should be entitled to have access to single sex toilets?

Or that you understand why they would want one in those circumstances but it's just tough shit because what trans people want is more important?

I wouldn't ban her from the house, but I would not indulge her delusions by called her 'him/he'. Then it's up to her whether or not she wants to continue going to your house.

It's not a world that respects women's choice to access single sex spaces or sports, is it?

No its not

but the world of sport looks like its moving more towards female only sport (albeit very slowly) and once that domino falls others will

This ‘those who object are a dying breed’ is rubbish….

Yes, that poster comes across like she has no idea what she’s really supporting but probably means well. Maybe she’ll do some research and understand

Sounds like she needs to educate herself.

They have no idea how backwards they have it, such is their programmed delusion. They really think that feminists will give in and accept males in our spaces and sports. You have to be more than a little fucked up in the head to think feminists will EVER give in. We never did with the right to vote, or the right to drink in public bars, nor the right to our single sex spaces the first time around, and we certainly won't be now. The more unhinged the behaviour of these trans activists (terrorists) behaviour is, the more women lose sports to males, the more they lose ground. Trans is not, and never was, a civil rights movement. That, is where menopausalfart is confused. They are defending a dangerous Mens Rights movement. And it's a war they are losing. Feminists are getting louder and louder and louder.

I said it "might be" a valid reason in that it might be but I haven't thought it through in full, that's literally it. I don't know why you care about my opinion on that or want me to come down on one side of a fence.

Frankly, just stopping your efforts of shaming others who have experiences that you don't would be a great start.

❤️

Ohhh the richest thing I’ve read on mumsnet