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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would it bother you if your dh/oh smoked weed all day?

125 replies

Loveheart13101 · 30/03/2025 16:19

NDN, they seem like nice people, very quiet neighbours, both working full time, have children in the house, but the husband gets in from work and goes straight out to have a smoke.

At the weekend he seems to smoke weed all day long. He goes off driving after he’s been smoking too.

Smoking weed seems to be so common these days, you can smell it when pulled up at traffic lights, coming from people’s homes, people standing near playgrounds and even near the school at pick up time.

Has it just become so normal that most people are fine with it?

OP posts:
SmurfKingdom · 30/03/2025 16:22

I couldn’t be with someone like that. It’s vile.

AgnesX · 30/03/2025 16:22

I wouldn't be happy about it personally.

ForAzureSeal · 30/03/2025 16:23

No I wouldn't be ok with this. To me smoking weed all day is akin to drinking all day. Not smoking tobacco all day. (Although I also would not be ok with smoking tobacco all day)

Gundogday · 30/03/2025 16:23

He’d be an ex.

RampantIvy · 30/03/2025 16:23

Of course it would.

Jellytotsburnmytongue · 30/03/2025 16:24

I wouldn't be ok with this. I personally hate the smell though. I've spoken to people who apparently love the smell, but to me it's a no.

Hatty65 · 30/03/2025 16:24

There's nothing more boring than a stoner. He's barely functioning if this is his entire weekend/evenings. And is presumably working to support his habit.

He's not much of a husband or father, clearly.

Nosaucelikemintsauce · 30/03/2025 16:25

As a late teen exh was a weed user.. As an adult he was paranoid and moody..
Exh..
If I had known I would never have gotten involved...
Grim.

UpToMyElbowsInDiapers · 30/03/2025 16:26

Revolting. Absolutely not. And I live in a place where it’s legal (but most parents wouldn’t smoke week all day just as most parents wouldn’t drink all day without it being considered a problem!)

Topseyt123 · 30/03/2025 16:27

I wouldn't put up with it at all. It would be a total deal breaker and he would find himself single.

FadedRed · 30/03/2025 16:27

It’s a crime to drive while under the influence of cannabis (and other drugs) in the same way that driving under the influence of alcohol, and there is a roadside test for DUI. You can report this (anonymously if necessary) and maybe stop him from injuring or killing someone.

blacksax · 30/03/2025 16:28

I wouldn't tolerate a partner doing that no, and I'd be pissed off at a neighbour smoking so much weed that I could smell it in my home. I might go so far as to report them to the police for suspected drug dealing at the premises.

Tilda86 · 30/03/2025 16:29

I wouldn't put up with it no.

MrsSunshine2b · 30/03/2025 16:29

But it's not YOUR DH, or any of ours. Maybe he has a condition which causes chronic pain. Maybe he has anxiety or another issue and is self-medicating. It's not really any of your business.

Original poster
Loveheart13101 · 30/03/2025 16:30

I find it really odd. I know I’m probably being a nosy neighbour I just don’t get it.

They’ve both actually got good jobs, not jobs that you might possibly associate with being stoned all evening and weekend.

Our walls are so thin you can hear everything and I’ve never heard them arguing so I can only assume they’re happy and the wife is fine about it.

I find it weird and gross but was starting to wonder if I’m uptight.

OP posts:
Shegotanology · 30/03/2025 16:31

Not if it was being used for pain. I'd prefer cannabis to strong painkillers.
If it's all the time for recreational purposes, it would piss me right off.

Dearover · 30/03/2025 16:32

MrsSunshine2b · 30/03/2025 16:29

But it's not YOUR DH, or any of ours. Maybe he has a condition which causes chronic pain. Maybe he has anxiety or another issue and is self-medicating. It's not really any of your business.

In which case they shouldn't be driving. An 11 year old was killed in our village because off a drug driver. There's no excuse, ever.

gottakeeponmoving · 30/03/2025 16:33

I’d move house. The smell makes me feel sick, I couldn’t live there.

Original poster
Loveheart13101 · 30/03/2025 16:33

blacksax · 30/03/2025 16:28

I wouldn't tolerate a partner doing that no, and I'd be pissed off at a neighbour smoking so much weed that I could smell it in my home. I might go so far as to report them to the police for suspected drug dealing at the premises.

Would the police even care though? Honestly it seems to be so common round here, you go for a walk
and you smell it coming from peoples homes. I wouldn’t say we live in a terrible area.

He is annoying me because of course we can smell it in our garden and even in the house when the windows are open.

OP posts:
user1471538275 · 30/03/2025 16:34

They would not be my partner, husband or father of my children.

I have ....................standards. (hoiks bosom)

I'm judging from afar and I'm judging hard.

Original poster
Loveheart13101 · 30/03/2025 16:36

user1471538275 · 30/03/2025 16:34

They would not be my partner, husband or father of my children.

I have ....................standards. (hoiks bosom)

I'm judging from afar and I'm judging hard.

Same tbh, I think the woman must have very low standards.

OP posts:
JazzyJelly · 30/03/2025 16:36

Him smoking weed at home is Mrs Next Door's problem. Him driving while high is everyone's problem! He could kill someone.

blacksax · 30/03/2025 16:37

Loveheart13101 · 30/03/2025 16:33

Would the police even care though? Honestly it seems to be so common round here, you go for a walk
and you smell it coming from peoples homes. I wouldn’t say we live in a terrible area.

He is annoying me because of course we can smell it in our garden and even in the house when the windows are open.

Show quote history

They haven't got the manpower to deal with recreational smokers, but they are far more interested if they think somebody is dealing drugs.

Shegotanology · 30/03/2025 16:37

It's not always about low standards. He may have a very real addiction. When you love someone, you don't just leave.

bettydavieseyes · 30/03/2025 16:38

It stinks. Anything that stinks is antisocial. His wife might not mind. I'd hate that to be my neighbour. The smell travels I wouldn't be married to him that's certain.