Would it bother you if your dh/oh smoked weed all day?

[Loveheart13101]

NDN, they seem like nice people, very quiet neighbours, both working full time, have children in the house, but the husband gets in from work and goes straight out to have a smoke.

At the weekend he seems to smoke weed all day long. He goes off driving after he’s been smoking too.

Smoking weed seems to be so common these days, you can smell it when pulled up at traffic lights, coming from people’s homes, people standing near playgrounds and even near the school at pick up time.

Has it just become so normal that most people are fine with it?

I also don’t really care whether they are keen on us or not.

We aren’t doing anything antisocial or illegal or driving under the influence.

Disgusting. Report him every time he gets into the car after smoking

Yes, of course it would bother me. I truly do not know anyone who obviously smokes and it’s definitely not something I see around here (I think we are more Sauvignon blanc and coke in these parts 😂 not me personally, I don’t even drink).

God no. It's often grown using g modern slavery

YES

I have never taken illegal drugs in my life.

As stated in my initial post, the smell of gear gives me migraine instantly.

I can read perfectly well, thank you.

Has being stoned by proxy 'all day' given you paranoia?

Because you do seem quite aggressive.

If you want to report your neighbours, report your neighbours.

It's that simple.

Stoners aren’t interesting.

Yes. Except they wouldn't be my DH. That would be an absolute deal breaker for me.

@BornSandyDevotionali have responded to you in the same aggressive tone that you did to me.

You completely misread my original post and accused me of exaggerating because I said the neighbours wife seems was smoking all day. When I clearly said he was smoking evenings and all day on weekends.

You told me that the neighbours probably didn’t like me either. Not sure what need there was to say that.

You called me a nosey old busy body. Again, not sure why you felt the need to say that.

I asked if women here would be ok with their husbands smoking weed all day. I reckon most decent people wouldn’t like it if the neighbours were smoking weed in the garden.

I suspect you jeers just looking for an argument.

No it wouldn’t bother me. My DH smokes weed, he goes out for a smoke in the evening when DD is in bed. He doesn’t drive after smoking, ever. That would be a hard line for me. He doesn’t drink alcohol.

I think you are assuming that smoking weed = unable to function. People who smoke weed regularly have an incredible tolerance for it. If DH didn’t tell me he was going for a smoke, I honestly wouldn’t be able to tell the difference in him. He doesn’t suddenly get red eyes, dry mouth and start raiding the cupboards 😂

I don’t consider that I have low standards, it just doesn’t bother me. If he was lazy, unemployed etc then I’d have an issue with it but as it stands we’re very happily married!

If DH was bothering a neighbour he’d be happy to go elsewhere/do it while taking the dog for a walk etc if we were approached politely.

The odd toke at the end of the day I wouldn't be too bothered with but an all day pot binge nope.

No, it’s not ok. I could never be with a weed smoker. The smell alone makes me feel really sick

“He goes off driving after he’s been smoking too.”

Yes she has…

I smoke myself so I'd probably join him 🙂

I would not be at all happy with this.

I understand the chronic pain element potentially. My son's sports coach I know has chronic pain due to a very serious car accident that ended his professional sports career - they pretty much had to rebuild him with steel rods. I think in a few cases it can be helpful. But notably - he doesn't smoke all day, not when he's working with the kids, and especially not when he's driving.

The driving thing is dangerous to the community. And most people like this aren't in chronic pain, they are just addicts, albeit low level.

everyone I’ve ever met who’s a regular weed smoker has always been a massive loser. I’d rather die sad lonely and celibate than date a man who took drugs all the time

My ex became addicted to weed - it was awful! He didn’t realise how much his mood changed for the worse when he was high - which was most of the time. I ended it when I realised he probably was addicted.

Edible cannabis user here. I use small amounts alongside lion's mane supplements for my ADHD. I dislike the smoke, and don't want to smoke anything. I don't need a lot and I definitely don't like the heavily stoned feeling. Enough to slow my brain down to concentrate, basically.

My ex was an all day weed smoker, which is one of many reasons he's an ex. There is no getting away from the smell. The reason why a lot of weed smokers burn incense sticks/cones/bricks etc, is to try and cover the smell. It permeates everything, and you obviously become nose blind. It became a major problem because without it, he was nasty and moody, and he needed more and more to feel an effect.

It definitely wouldn't be with someone who smoked it all day again. He wasn't like that when we first got together. I hated the fact that everything reeked all the time, and he refused to go outside.

She probably smokes too.

I guess we all have different dealbreakers. I would not want a partner who smokes all day but there maybe things that would annoy me even more.

Oh I misread that, every evening and the weekends. Oh yeah most people I know wouldn’t care about that much. I read that first as 24/7 except when he sleeps!

It just depends on what you’ve been exposed to as normal hence why she is fine with it. That’s likely been her normal all her life. Like living with a cigarette smoker.

That's a bit ageist. Why do you assume that OP is old?

Wouldn’t you consider smoking weed from 10am in the morning to 10pm at night ‘all day’? I’ve no idea whether he smokes at work but first thing he does on arriving home is go for a smoke.

He hasn’t been at work today and you can smell it as soon as you get in so he’s obviously smoking today.

I disagree that what you are exposed to becomes normal.

Both of my parents smoked like chimneys (cigarettes) and I would never be with a smoker. I knew loads of people who smoked weed too and again, I’d never ever be with someone who smoked weed.

I don’t care what anyone says, you can’t be functioning normally if you’re smoking weed all day.

It’s also totally wrong to expose children to a drug habit. No one can justify that.

“Oh I misread that, every evening and the weekends.”

So yes I misread before and updated myself - it’s not what I thought I read “all day, everyday”.

It’s evenings and weekends (all day).

So yeah I can more imagine why that doesn’t phase her. Probably used to it. I was raised out people with similar weed routines and they functioned normally in their lives. It doesn’t necessarily become “normal” but if that’s what you were exposed to as normal then likely you will be more comfortable with it than people who were never exposed to it. Similarly you would see weed smoking as “a drug habit” whereas I put it on the same category as booze and cigarettes.

I am not sure why you want to understand why his missus is ok with it - what makes you assume she is not a smoker too?

But as I and others have said if the smell bothers you just let them know.

I think you should report him for driving when impaired.
That could impact on any of us
Quite literally
On any children too.
Perhaps you could ring 101 or crimestoppers so an alert can be linked to his vehicle reg.

I don't smoke weed but I don't care what people do. It's their business and there are far far worse things to doing.

I personally wouldn't date a stoner who smoked all day because I don't like the lifestyle and there wouldn't be any shared interests or cross over at that point, but the person I'm with now smokes once every couple of weeks at the weekend and I've no issue with it. I drink every other weekend and he doesn't drink at all so it would be a lot the pot calling the kettle black to say anything.

Grim. The only people I know who do this are really disappointing as both husbands and fathers. So dependant on it.