Friend posting things to my parents house

[HattenO]

Hi all. I'm British but we now live in north of France (my DP is french).

I have a friend here who is Canadian but also lives here in France. She is aware we are going over to the UK to visit and stay with my parents over Easter. She asked me a couple of weeks ago if she could order something online from the UK which can only be delivered to a UK address and if she could get it posted to my parents house and I could collect it for her when we are all over at easter. No worries I said, I'll let my parents know and I'm sure that's fine. I gave her the address to use.

She replied later that day to say thank you and she had ordered 3 things which would be delivered separately. Okay that fine I said (although she hadn't told me it was 3 things beforehand). My parents let me know when each of the packages had been delivered - then messaged me to day a 4th had come.Before I got round to messaging my friend about this - she messaged me saying I hope you don't mind but I ordered just one more thing. I said yes I know it's already arrived you have all 4 things at my parents already. Today my dad messaged me to inform me that yesterday a 5th parcel arrived for her and today a 6th parcel. I knew absolutely nothing about it. My dad is pretty unhappy. He feels like his house is being used as a parcel delivery Depot for someone he doesn't even know so now he's narky with me.

How unreasonable am I being to be feeling bloody annoyed with this friend and how would you handle it. Truth be told I'm not very good at asserting myself in situations like this and I don't want to be impolite.

Thanks in advance

Yes @Winter2020 I want to know what’s in those parcels as well. Very nosey of me I know.

I can see why you might find this irritating, as you need to squish these items into your case, but blimey, why on earth is your Dad bothered? All he has to do is throw these packages into the room you'll be sleeping in. He sounds like a right Victor Meldrew.

Wouldn’t bother me one bit, it’s just parcels, and a savvy way of doing it too, but then everyone is different and if it bothers you and your parents sooooo much, just refuse to take any more.

I learnt a long time ago that no good deed goes unpunished and this is a classic example. Personally I'd return the parcels to sender and tell her that you weren't prepared to take unknown goods through customs. Cheeky cow.

If you don’t like conflict just say exactly what you said about your luggage. That you’re flying so have got limited space, and didn’t realise it was going to be so many parcels. Also ask what’s in them because some things aren’t safe to go in the hold (and you don’t fancy becoming an inadvertent drug mule - although don’t say that bit necessarily).

Has she actually told you what she's bought OP?

Are they small things like an eyeliner or chunky things?

And also we are flying over not driving so yes - all these bloody parcels have to fit in our luggage
What!
Tell her you'll bring over the original item you agreed to and the rest have to be collected by her next time she is in uk

@Imsodepressediactlikeitsmybirthday so it wouldn’t bother you if you had to leave some of your own stuff behind in order to fit all her stuff in your suitcase to bring back to France?

Probably the general inconvenience of taking things in for a stranger to him. In MN world people get hacked off at taking stuff in for neighbours.

Possibly also the worry that someone is taking credit out on their address.

They don't all have to fit in your luggage, you have a choice here to just say "you ordered much more than agreed so please let me know which parcel you want me to bring back. You originally said one parcel so that's all I've kept space for."

She really is a CF!

If I were you, I would say that your Dad is not happy about being her personal postal depot & will refuse to accept any more items. That you had agreed reluctantly agreed 3, but 6 is unacceptable & she is taking liberties.

i would then say that you have very little room in your luggage, as you are flying, so she will have to pay for an extra bag & any excess baggage costs, if applicable - DO NOT give her any of her items until she pays you.

What if it illegal stuff?

What if it's Ann Summers gear that your carting through customs?

What if you get stung for import duties?

Many reasons to be wary of what you are being asked to carry.

Absolutely taking the piss to the max!!!! This is cheeky fuckery at its finest!!!

How else is she getting them back to France? Floo powder?

Tell her no more, you’re flying and she’s taking the piss! I thought you were driving! Cheeky cow.

Tell her to stop and ask her what 3 parcels she would like you to prioritise in the event you can’t fit all 6 in your luggage.
Your friend is very cheeky!

Totally agree they are a cf but I'd be more worried about carrying any parcel through customs that wasn't mine. I've clearly watched to many Border Force!

I think you say the agreement was for one parcels and one parcel is what you will bring back with you. She needs to find someone else to bring over the other parcels, and also to collect them asap from your parents address - at your parents convenience but within the next 7 days.

Any further parcels will be refused.

I think she has spread the word around that @HattenO will bring back parcels and other people are jumping on this handy courier service.

I would purposely leave one or two behind to be honest, she's a cf. Text her immediately and say "X my dad called to say another parcel arrived, you need to stop. You asked for 3 things and to be honest I think you are taking the piss. My parents aren't a depot and I am not a courier. I will try to fit the 3 I agreed in my case but I doubt I will manage the rest, you will need to wait and see but I have things to bring back myself so I won't be prioritising your stuff. If it needs collecting you will need to arrange a courier ASAP and my folks can't be inconvenienced more than they have been" cheeky cow

Maybe it’s a cultural thing. I’m a canuck and my first thought was who cares? My parents would be fine with it and wouldn’t see an issue. Helping out a friend bring nice etc.

Guess from the posts it’s very different here. I don’t think she did anything wrong as again it’s walking to the door five times and putting the packages together but again clearly it is here.

I would say to her that you were led to believe that it was only one item, and somehow there are now 6, so she is going to have to arrange a courier, because you are taking the plane and you neither want to be carrying it, paying for it or be responsible for it. That shes put you in an awkward positionj with your parents and their limited space

If you're flying you will have to open them anyway simply for space reasons let alone customs. If you don't have space/weight then leave them, I presume you'll have your own list of things you may want to buy to bring back

you'd lug strange things through customs for someone else and your parents would put up with having their house filled with parcels with unknown contents?