DH refusing to financially help sister after she went on holiday.

[Sallymeblue]

I need to keep this as vague as possible. We are financially supporting me sister and have been doing so for several years. This year for the first time, in a very long time, her family are going on holiday and this has enraged DH. He is seething that we are supporting whilst they are going to holiday, he doesn't think they should expect help and go on holiday.

He is taking his anger out on me because I don't work due, and be feels I dont contribute to the household and he support me and my sister

Is it a dream holiday in Disneyworld or a caravan in Skeggy?

Not that it's the only consideration at all, but I can see how the former would obviously enrage him, whilst the latter might feel considerably less like blatant advantage-taking.

Team DH too.

Why don't you and your sister work? Is she not allowed too based on immigration rules?

Is your sister his ex wife? That’s the only situation I could see him being unreasonable in not wanting to finance her and her children.

Surely this situation can’t go on indefinitely. Your husband is having to support not only his own family, but also your sister out of one wage? How is that sustainable? What’s the exit plan?

I'm with DH on this. HE is supporting her and is rightly pissed off.

Why does your sister need to be financially supported and why does it fall to your husband to do it?

This BOGO is not a good deal for the husband.

You and your sister are taking financial advantage of your husband. Of course she shouldn't be taking holidays when her BIL is funding her life.

Unless you are disabled and cannot physically work, get a job and support your sister and yourself. Maybe she could get a job too if not disabled.

This might be an eye opener for him.

Depends on the holiday … a few days in a mates Caravan, or, 2 weeks in the Caribbean ?

Why does your DH need to support your sister's family? What is their work/financial situation? Is she married with children? Does your sister work? This set up seems quite unusual if it has been going on for years, rather than just providing some financial help in an emergency situation.

Why are you supporting your sister?

Do you work?

@Sallymeblue So what are you going to do about this development- Dh refusing to continue helping your sister?

What has your sister said she is going to do about this development- your Dh's decision to stop helping her?

When last was your DH on holiday?

Even if DS is disabled, that’s completely irrelevant. It’s not for her BIL to support her.

Why is your husband financially supporting YOUR sister?

There might be something cultural going on here. But until there's a bit more context the whole situation sounds a bit bizarre and unfair on your DH.

But we don't know enough to comment fairly.

Why does your DH have to financially support your sister and family? I'd be pretty pissed off if I was him. Particularly as you don't work either so you are contributing nothing financially.

If my sister needed support to eat and pay basic bills I’d step in, but absolutely wouldn’t support her to pay for luxuries and definitely not a holiday. I’m not surprised your DH is fuming.

This, of course.

So you don’t work, she doesn’t work.

so he’s supporting YOU and your sister? YABU. Stop supporting your sister and get a job before he ends up leaving you. You’re using him for money!

Well yeah, if she can go on holiday it's time to support herself. You definitely can't be taking issue with him not wanting to continue to bank roll your sister. If you want to pay for her holidays, you'll need to get a job.

Why should your husband pay for you and your sisters lives? Makes no sense.

@MoreChocPls it's in the OP that she's unemployed and it's just her husband funding her and her sister for some reason.

There will be some sort of drip feed. Disability, perhaps?

You are using your husband.
Glad he has realised.
If you don't see that he is being used you he needs to get rid of you too.

Spongers.

What a goady post! Surely you can see how unreasonable this is or you’re a complete moron!

I'm with your DH on this, your dsis and her family are taking the absolute piss out of him, not you as you aren't actually contributing.

Why can’t you and your sister support yourselves? Do you both have disabilities which prevent you working?