Feeling very uncomfortable and almost violated after visit today by BT Engineer

[DontGoChasinWaterfalls]

I need a sense check and to realise I'm not overreacting.
BT engineer came today to upgrade my service to fibre optic broadband. He was late first of all which could've been accepted if he acknowledged he was late and apologised. He stepped into my house with his work boots on and I asked if he would mind wearing shoe covers as I have grey carpets. I'd never ask workmen to take shoes off and I provide the blue shoe coverings. He huffed and said he has to go in and out my house. Immediately I felt uncomfortable but explained I have a small child who sits and crawls on the carpet. He reluctantly agreed.
He somehow managed to jam the lock on my porch door by trying to leave it on the latch. After 15 minutes I managed to release it. He then tells me he needs a colleague to come to do something outside with the plyons and phrased it as "if it's after 2pm they won't bother coming". He eventually starts work after 40 minutes after faffing and I go upstairs to do some work.
5 minutes later I hear a panicked call asking if he could use my bathroom. Before I could say anything he was half way up the stairs. I froze and he directed himself to the bathroom. He was in there for 20 minutes and I was now downstairs feeling quite upset. Eventually he comes downstairs and doesn't say anything. I went upstairs to survey the damage and it was horrendous to say the least. To make things worse he rooted through my wardrobe to find the toilet paper.
I feel disgusted and sick..but feel like I'm overreacting as I don't know if he was unwell or has a medical condition.
He's got to come back tomorrow and I don't want him here.
aibu to call OpenReach to request another engineer???

Looked in the bathroom cabinet first.

Op he took the piss and should have left your toilet the way he found it and not ventured into your bedroom.

He sounds useless, lazy and dirty.
I would let his company know because I'd hate to have someone like him in a truly vulnerable person's household.

"Destroy"? Your description of what was wrong with your bathroom sounds nothing like it was "destroyed". Imo you are making a mountain out of a molehill. (The bath mat and the towel were crumpled! The horror!)

Agree with this!

Come on, I agree he behaved like a twat but I think him being 36 minutes late when he has likely been made late by jobs is a bit daft to worry about.

You can request someone else based on the way he treated your bathroom for sure. Medical issues or whatever aside, he could have cleaned up after himself and not gone in your bedroom absolutely.

was it BT or Openreach (assume Openreach)? I work for Openreach so feel free to DM me if you wish to raise a complaint. Sorry you’ve had such an awful experience.

I had an engineer that came to put in fibre optic, and he had his phone open all the time on a call to his kids whilst working. He did the job, but I could hear them from my work study. I don't mind work people using the toilet if they ask, but they have always left in good condition (I generally leave a roll of toilet paper out, not locked away, as I like to have a roll to hand immediately anyway).

He was rude about the shoe covers (to protect the carpet, not the 6 year old).

Using the toilet is unavoidable sometimes. And he didnt raid the wardrobe if the toilet rolls were visible as he hurried past.

Title is ridiculous, you were inconvenienced not violated.

Really a dust sheet is better if they are going in and out, those shoe covers whilst useful for some trades are fiddly and not good if they are not staying in one place.

poor guy needed the loo and the paper ran out, he had seen some from the landing so fetched it.

he needed a colleague

i really think you are over analysing this

I have a condition where I need to go to the loo suddenly and urgently and often it isn’t a pretty sight afterwards. But that bowel condition doesn’t mean I can’t spray air freshener, open a window, straighten bath mats, put bleach down the loo, wait 2 mins, flush again, bit more bleach, shut window. It wouldn’t take 20 mins either. 5 mins at the very most.

I don’t think this poor bloke had a medical condition, he was just a bad mannered pig.

Surely they give those great time slots to allow for the uncertainty in how long jobs will take. No, of course they don't - they ram as many appointments as they can (to save them money), leaving the customers (paying for a service) having to take a 1/2 days leave to sit around and wait for someone to be late. They should call if they're going to be late.
I don't think OP was worrying, I think she was annoyed that the engineer didn't even acknowledge the lateness nor apologise.

We had a nightmare telecoms engineer recently. Sub contractors for BT. Rude, in and out with dirty boots, humiliating his apprentice in front of us. It was clear he was unable to complete the task, complained he was only paid £15 per day to have the apprentice, slagged off BT followed by the full story of his divorce. Then onto his recent fight with a man who let his dog pee on his door. Hmm.Luckily my loo was out of order.

I had no qualms about ringing BT to tell them not to send him again.

Whilst I didnt feel violated, he was intimidating and not someone I wanted in my home.

I should have said they they obviously make an effort but it seems a bit rude to teach my dcs friends how to straighten the bathroom the way I like it.

I had no qualms about ringing BT to tell them not to send him again

I'm amazed you got to speak to an actual person [misses point].

Human beings shit. He hasn’t violated anything. He needed to go to the toilet.
People like you and everyone being so dramatic over a normal bodily function are why those of us with IBD or similar are embarrassed to go out. Grow up.

…so he’s had a shit, realised there is no paper… and instead of “making do” (looking in the bathroom cupboard, using the inside of the roll - can be done in desperation or using water, or even using a sock .. again can be done)… he pulls his trousers up, waddles to your wardrobe, and roots in there just in case - Or maybe he has x-Ray eyes

Nonesense - I’m almost tempted to say that the Poo Troll is back.

All very odd. Why no loo paper in bathroom and why did the guy go to your wardrobe to look for it?

This! Why is everyone questioning why there was no spare loo roll in the bathroom, saying it normal to spend 20 mins in a clients bathroom, saying the Op doesn’t know her own feelings. When did Mumsnetters become so accepting of bad behaviour. If that had been her husband arriving home late, being rude and spending that time in the loo and leaving it in a state, she’d have been told to LTB.

Yes it’s so strange. OP said he left the toilet in a right state. But apparently that’s fine?!

Worry about/annoyed - that’s hair splitting, I meant the same thing. When you book you are told it’s a rough time estimate, or at least we were when our last engineer came out. He was indeed late and I don’t recall him apologising or testing or phoning ahead, but he was also very kind to me and I was kind to him. Obviously it would be great in an ideal world if they could phone or text ahead but sometimes it’s not possible and I don’t even know what details they give to the engineers.

But lateness aside, this guy behaved like a dick in general.

There was loo roll and spare in the bathroom- OP has explained all this. How was OP to know he’d go through the whole lot then rummage around in her bedroom.

What if she’d been in there naked? According to some on here that would probably have been fine too. Then off she goes to clean up all his shit. This site is so weird sometimes.

I once had a window cleaner appear in my bedroom when I was in bed!

He'd just got MADLY lost in the house. It's only a small house but is on strange levels so I could sort of understand it.

He looked like he wanted to die, so I accepted his apology and showed him how to get to the back door...

It’s all very dramatic.

Some of you must live like heathens, you think it's fine to leave shitty skids all over someone's toilet and think op is the one with the problem?

Fuck off 🫠

He made a mess and didn’t clean it up. The amount of people defending this makes me think you don’t clean up after yourselves if you make a mess in someone’s loo. Disgusting.

Yep this is becoming very clear….