Not to take husband to work everyday and pick him up

[robinsongs]

I have a 5 month old and two young children in early primary school years and mornings are pretty hectic as it is. Dh works a 10 minute drive away 20 minute walk and expects me to drive him there in the morning as I’m on maternity and pick him up when he finishes but he doesn’t have a finish time so he just texts when he’s finished, which is usually when I’m in the middle of cooking dinner or something and expects me to drop everything.
I put my foot down and said no as it’s disrupting 4 people in the morning as it’s 10 minutes each way and that’s 20 minutes cut off my morning and I have a baby to feed and then to get the others to school.

He isn’t one for taking no for an answer and has pushed and pushed and basically insisted telling the children they will be getting up earlier from now on to take daddy and I feel defeated as I have firmly said no and he’s just not accepting it because he’s decided I will.
AIBU or should I take him to work as I’m home all day and he’s working hard or should he respect my no and not push and push. He’s now asleep thinking he’s getting a lift in and picked up and I am awake feeling quite bitter that no matter how many times I made it clear I wouldn’t be taking him, it seems he’s just decided he’s getting his way and I am.
He can’t drive himself to work as there’s no parking nearby.

This

No need for a sarcastic answer.

Mybtwo dcs have always walked 20 mins to do school. They don’t look disheveled when they arrive.
dh regularly walks down to town. 20 mins walk. He doesn’t look sweaty and crap, as if he had done a run either.

Granted, if you’re wearing high heels, it migut be harder. But that the OP’s dh were talking about.

He needs to learn to drive.

Literally this. If the kids are ready he gets a lift. If they aren't, he doesn't. Simple.

Sometimes when people don't listen, it's time to stop talking. Actions speak louder. You need to not do it, and keep on not doing it, consistently. Caving sometimes is like giving into the nagging of toddlers sometimes - just teaches them to keep doing it.

This "not taking no for an answer" thing is not going to stop unless you stop it. It'll end up being over bigger and more unreasonable things. Better to call a halt now, with a smaller thing like this. Demonstrate, with actions not words, that a no remains a no whether he "takes" it or not. You don't need him to agree or accept it, you just need to not do it. Don't do it. Ever.

I really can’t understand this. Our station is about 20 mins from our house. My husband used to use the station every day. He never asked me for a lift.

WOW!
It’s a 20 minute walk and will do him! What a lazy selfish man!
My DH wouldn’t dream of expecting me to do this! Just say no and don’t do it.

To be quite honest it sounds like it

Suggest he gets an electric bike.

Where did it say he can’t drive?

Op had children with “one”

Completely agree. As someone with 3 under 5s there is NO WAY I would even consider this. Getting their shoes on/ coats/ actually in their bloody car seats (!) is a mission. Why on earth should you do it twice completely unnecessarily.

DD walks 40 mins to school. Only gets a lift out of me if it’s a monsoon. She survives.
DH walks 15 mins to the station before the 30 min train journey to work. He thinks that’s a quick commute (London). I have been giving my DS lifts to school, a 20 min walk, recently but that because he’s recovery from a nasty break.
So would love to know why your DH can’t walk?

Been thinking about this. I pick up dd from ex house in mornings -it’s a couple of miles. I put into google maps

it can take 10mins - equally some morning traffic is awful and more like 25/30mins each way

it is just over 3miles and map says it’s just under an hour to walk it

so agree with others maybe it’s not 20m walk (which if it is should be able to do it) but my map /journey shows it 3 times that

Why should the kids be scooped up and dragged around because their father is too bone idle to walk 20 minutes to work? His place of work is a TWENTY MINUTE walk from home and he wants to be picked up!? Beggars belief. Getting 3 kids in and out of a car at the drop of a hat is ridiculous. This would be a big fat NO from me. Who does he think he is? Lazy bugger.

OP… every time he phones say no. And if he pushes tell him baby needs a nappy change. Rince and repeat.

he can drive but cannot park at his place of work ( oh dear ) is he going to have to give up work now then 🤔

We’ll drop the DCs near to school in the morning (15 - 20 mins walk) if it’s tipping it down with rain so they’re not sitting in wet clothes in school. Otherwise they walk and have done for years. It’s really uneconomical to drive a car for such a short distance if it’s stop / start traffic too.

Have you been up all night with a newborn?

What you've got is a selfish man who is happy to make life harder for you and your children to make his easier.

He wants to sleep in. Aww. He can't walk because he's a lazy fuck. Aww.

bus? bike? how far is it. If it's 10 mins in rush hour, I guess it's close and he could even walk?

He sounds incredibly selfish. For the love of god a 20 min walk is not far for a grown man! Do not give in!

Does he not drive?

Hell would freeze over before I did this every day WITH THREE DC

Sit him down, tell him that you WILL NOT be doing this and he needs to sort himself out

It's a 20 minute walk you say? How insanely lazy is he? That is such a short walk he should just bloody walk!

Sometimes it can take longer to drive than the equivalent walk.
For me 20 mins walk to work and 10 mine drive (minimum) is about right due to one way system and traffic
In my old house it was 5 minutes walk but 10-15 to drive

Please tell us you didn’t drive him today!