To think it’s wrong to go on holiday without DC

[Pinkdreams]

I keep seeing on Facebook women going on holiday multiple times a year, leaving their young DC at home, this isn’t just one person it’s multiple, as a mother I couldn’t stand the thought of being in a different country to my child, what if something happened? Is it just me? Is this the norm?

On my own now since 2014.

well that’s a relief

God I only wish I could get away, i’d love it, I would only go for a few days tops though I think, but wish it could be longer

And SUCH a surprise

Grow the fuck up

Same. Especially when they judge other people for making completely innocuous decisions about how they conduct their lives.

Touché!

Who on earth would be jealous of anyone holidaying in Dubai, a caravan in Clacton would be preferable.

Neither particularly appeal

but I’d take Dubai over clacton any day

You’re in the minority.

I would rather stay at home than go to either!

both sound grim. But gun to my head Dubai would at least be an experience.

Whilst I personally would feel uncomfortable being in a different country to my children (unless they were with their dad and I wasn’t going too far), I don’t see a problem with other parents doing this if they feel okay.

I understand it’s my own anxiety stopping me and not everyone feels the same.

I did it, I left my kids at home with - shock, horror - their dad! Did I miss them? Yes of course. Did I enjoy myself? Definitely. Are my children mentally scarred for life? Nope 😁 and I would do it again if I got the opportunity

We go away once a year abroad for a long weekend and leave our kids 3&7 for 3-4 days. They are with family so they are absolutely fine.

We have 50/50 and the children’s dad is much more well off than us and the kids go abroad all the time you can’t protect them all the time!! Why be so judgy of other people???

Well I go away without my child who is 14 because I have shared custody.
So i go for one week and a couple of weekends away without her, yearly.

With my daughter we do a week in the school hoildays and again at Easter or Xmas

I do have guilt sometimes going away without her but it's also just the reality of my personal situation.

It's easy to judge.

I’m currently debating whether or not to go on a short break abroad with my husband without my children. My friends are encouraging me to take some time for myself and my husband but I feel guilty 🤦🏼‍♀️ so I totally get this!

We did go on our honeymoon without our DC when she was 1 and felt so guilty about it, but knew she was in good hands with her grandparents. That being said, we still worried about her and thought of her every day, especially seeing other couples with their young DC. On the other hand, we have been away abroad with DC when she was 2 and she ended up being sick and overnight stay in a Turkish Hospital! Plus there’s having to organise bringing the pram and car seat also. You can never really relax either way. You’re worried/guilty if they are not there, or frustrated and exhausted when they are, it’s a different type of holiday. There’s no right or wrong, as long as you ensure, as their parents, that they are being well care for either way 🤷‍♀️

I’d love to go on holiday somewhere sunny without my DC for a week. A week with no work and no-one asking anything of me sounds wonderful.

How about you do you and let other people do what they want without shaming them on Mumsnet

God, you should try it. I love a break away in the sun without 6am wake ups, no whinge and not being ordered to watch them do a handstand in the pool for 100th time by 10am. Get gone!

Went away 5 times, I believe, last year on my own, without the kids. F U patriarchy.

To each their own. If you have a good family support why not? I've left both my kids with my husband but not to go on holiday, family lives in a different country and mom was ill.
Because I don't have a good family network around me it never crossed my mind I could go on holiday without them.
But everyone's circumstances are different.
I'm happy for those who can. No need to be judgy about it.

I’m not really sure what you see as a problem?

Since my teens were very little my DH and I have had a couples city break every year without the kids. We also both go away individually with our friends every year. We are fortunate and we can afford to do this whilst also having several family holidays abroad each year.

No one has ever suffered through these trips. Our kids have had the doting grandparents come to stay or have stayed with friends, they have never missed us as have had too much fun. I also can’t remember ever missing my kids, even when they were tiny. At all other times of the year we live in each others pockets. We have dinner together every evening and spend every weekend around each other.

Now as older teens, they regularly go away with friends and their families and also invite their friends on our family holidays. Time apart is healthy.

You will never appreciate overseas travel more than the first time you get to pack for one and move through an airport without young kids hanging off every limb following having children!

Guess what I’m doing soon. I’m renting out a cabin just for little old me for 2 nights. My partner will be home with our toddler twins. I will try and resist the urge to flip them off as I’m leaving but I can’t make promises! I’m a tired SAHM and I want a couple of days to get some energy back for them. I guess I’m a bad mum 🤷🏻‍♀️

It was the best when my parents went on holiday together. I got to hang out with grandma without anyone else there.