(Most) Women don't look at men the same way men look at women?

[focuseddreamer]

Please can you all help me out as I’m interested to find if AIBU? Named changed for this.
Had a heated discussion with husband earlier this week where it came around to a subject we’ve discussed many times in the past but I always get shut down. Women don’t look at men in the same way as men look at women (I know that’s a very broad statement). So essentially he is saying many men will look at a woman and think “ cor look at the arse on that” and I agree as fundamentally males brains are hard-wired to do that. I am saying that (most) women do not look at men and think the same way. Women are more likely to think “ Cor he’s gorgeous/big/strong/intelligent/charismatic” etc, fundamental difference as women’s brains are hard-wired to look for a good mate to produce healthy off- spring.
Apparently, I’m wrong, I don’t know how women think and a lot of women think about men the same way men think about women!
So I’m interested to think what your thoughts on the subject are please. I’d like to show him the results from a group of women 😊

I don't. Don't think I've ever assessed a man as a threat unless he's actually behaving in a threatening way.

@hellohannah

I must say, it is so funny seeing people regurgitate Freud’s incesty theories with confidence. I have a psychology degree and we always used to laugh at how obnoxious Freud is. No one paid him any mind, yet here you are quoting “according to Freud” like the bible! 😄

I dont know if anyone's mentioned this but I can look at men in a purely sexual way, when I'm ovulating. It's like my hormones are telling me to mate with any healthy, attractive man.
The funny thing is, I was sitting in the garden reading your post and I looked up at the neighbour's roof and there was a very hot young man up there, bare chested! I immediately though "Corr!!".
I remember another time I was ovulating and our postman walked up our steps. I was admiring his very fit, muscular body. I've known him for years and have never thought of him that way!
Whenever I get these crude sexual feelings during ovulation, I think " This is how men must feel all the time!".
Please tell me I'm not the only one.

Probably because they are fertile!

Thats why women over a certain age almost become invisible.

Women are just more aesthetically pleasing 😂

I always think the women who say this are clearly not looking at the right men.

Women are not more aesthetically pleasing. Both sexes can be incredibly beautiful and aesthetically pleasing.

Ain't no woman on the planet I find more aesthetically pleasing then this guy, for example (Ruben Cortada)

Yeah definitely, ovulation ramps up my physical appreciation of the male sex.

Also they (men) are like blood hounds for ovulation lol. Intense looks from men on the train etc., check if ovulating (was TTC) yep.

I don't know why we use ovulation tests, men are way better at detecting it.

Or they just have very different tastes? I'm bi and he's not my type of man at all. I'd far rather a lovely Ruebenesque lady with beautiful soft skin and flowing hair. He looks like he loves himself a bit and I'd immediately be turned off!

The men I find attractive are academic sorts. Certainly fit and healthy, but none of them look like they've spent hours in a gym. And even then, I think on a completely aesthetic level, women's bodies can often be a lot more beautiful. Men's legs, for example, are often not very appealing parts of their body. Same with feet.

I'm not sure an oiled up, photoshopped, posed photoshoot of a celebrity model-type is really a good comparison for the average male women are likely to see in day to day life!

Either way, I still wouldn't be ogling anyone!

I wonder if many men have had that experience most women have had where a man talks to our boobs rather than our face?
Do any women gaze at a man’s package whilst in conversation?
I also wonder if any woman has ever received a dick pic and thought - fabulous, thank you

I'm bi

Exactly.

Fucking HELL, is it possible to get pregnant from a photograph?

@StrawberryDream24 Your post is practically a public service announcement 😍

He looks like he loves himself a bit and I'd immediately be turned off!

Its amazing what different people perceive in someone.

I think he looks modest, serious ....and everything I know about him corresponds with that.

And? That doesn't mean I can't look at bodies from a completely unbiased perspective. I don't want to sleep with every woman I see just as I don't want to sleep with every man I see.

Lol.

And those are photos I picked trying not to get my post deleted.

You see the narrowed eyes, big ears and shaved head aren’t doing it for me AT ALL. I admit the ones on the right are a bit better.

I'm not sure an oiled up, photoshopped, posed photoshoot of a celebrity model-type

He's not photo-shopped.

I don't think he's oiled up either, he's sweating a bit.

(Not in the catwalk shot of his face obviously).

How on earth do you know he's not photoshopped or oiled up? 🤣 It's a photoshoot, he's not just done a workout beforehand for a natural sweat.

Men's legs, for example, are often not very appealing parts of their body

Many women are absolutely fixated on men's legs.

As I said, it's not a surprise you say you're bi.

Never ever looked at a guys back side and thought cor look at that ass. I have looked at the front bit and thought cor look at that big bulge or look at those abs or he's gorgeous looking

And many women aren't. They've been mentioned above by presumably straight women, too. I like your casual biphobia though.

Because I've seen photos of him taken by paps.

I know this may take you by (inexplicable) surprise but people sweat in warm climates

Look, the fact that I've had a string of relationships with tall, thin, miserable, negative depressives is nothing but a coincidence, okay ? 😳

Are you sure you're not Mrs. Cortada? 😉

I know way more women who like men's legs than vice versa.

It's not "biphobia" to say that your tastes will reflect the fact you are bi - FFS.

I don’t get much at all from “eyeing up” men. I can appreciate an attractive one as being good looking in the exact same way as I can do with a woman, but I don’t get excited or aroused by “looking at men”, I never have. I don’t understand the chippendales or male strippers. So cringe, not hot.

I fancy people more once I know them, even if fairly briefly. What they look like matters, but I don’t look at a bloke and think “he’s sexy, I’d like to fck him” or whatever.

I would not be chatting on MN if I was Mrs. Cortada, I would be doing, ahem, other things.