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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sex noise from neighbours

211 replies

Discone · 16/03/2025 19:37

I live in an old terrace. I hear bits of noise from both sides normal life stuff, not an issue. Other neighbors play instruments and I can hear but it's no problem. Both sides have kids at least some of the time too.

This afternoon I could hear my neighbour (non music ones) having really loud sex. It's a fella who lives there I've had a few conversations with him he's in his 40s and lives alone. He's nice enough and no bother as a neighbour. It was the woman I could hear moaning. Tbh it sounded really fake and porny but whatever, they might like that. But that did make it more obvious and a bit cringe.

I put a note through the door saying we could hear and perhaps put on some music. It was polite in tone. I thought this was better than saying it face to face! But now I'm wondering if I shouldn't have done it. There's nothing I can do now it's done! But people are entitled to have sex in their house. I'm super sex positive but I do think it's a private thing and not something kids should hear for example. We have family over a lot and I'd be really embarrassed if this happened when they were over. I do massively over think so, a genuine wabu.

OP posts:
SnowFrogJelly · 23/04/2025 00:54

Another mumsnet pile on 🙄

SnowFrogJelly · 23/04/2025 00:55

You do you OP

Galwaygirlxxx · 23/04/2025 01:17

Discone · 16/03/2025 19:51

Haha I knew this would be one of the comments but you've done it even quicker than I thought! No I'm not, but I don't know how I can prove that?

Ok fair enough iabu. It was so loud and not even just towards the end. Like how women in porn sound. So it just felt quite inconsiderate as you deliberately make that noise. So I wanted to nip it in the bud. Because if I had family here, which I often would on a Sunday it would be embarrassing. Just to explain my thinking.

He's fine as a neighbour, I wouldn't say he was quiet, but I feel there's def a diff between deliberate notice and just life noise. But sex is part of life so, perhaps even if deliberatly loud it's ok.

But it's done now so I'm not gonna make it worse by saying oh yeah sorry I was a dick. I think that wouldn't help 😂

How women sound in porn... you seem so jealous. I supppose I sound like a pornstar screaming too cause my DH knows what he's doing. Moans are hot.

SnowFrogJelly · 23/04/2025 01:22

Galwaygirlxxx · 23/04/2025 01:17

How women sound in porn... you seem so jealous. I supppose I sound like a pornstar screaming too cause my DH knows what he's doing. Moans are hot.

Woo lucky you!!

I don’t think the OP is jealous

Galwaygirlxxx · 23/04/2025 01:23

SnowFrogJelly · 23/04/2025 01:22

Woo lucky you!!

I don’t think the OP is jealous

She's slagging off women who moan. It's a turn on for most people.

SnowFrogJelly · 23/04/2025 01:25

Galwaygirlxxx · 23/04/2025 01:23

She's slagging off women who moan. It's a turn on for most people.

It’s not a turn on when you hear your neighbours doing it!

unless you are weird

LaTristezaDurera · 23/04/2025 01:34

FondantFancyFan · 16/03/2025 20:17

I'd fix Soundproofing panels against the party wall so you don't have to hear the performance again.

Those aren't soundproofing panels and they won't do anything to cut out the noise.

Franjipanl8r · 23/04/2025 02:20

It was only a polite note! It’s not like the OP shat on his doorstep in retaliation.

RubberyChicken · 23/04/2025 12:11

Were there any slapping noises, a bit like someone wearing flip flops?

GoodCharl · 23/04/2025 12:29

I feel your pain op. Terrace houses are the worst for this. Had similar with my neighbour (single bloke in early 30s), then got with his girlfriend (oh baby we nicknamed her). It was laughable at times how bloody porn like it was. You could hear her (only her) all through the house, even my 8 year old was asking whats that noise mum. I banged on the walls, did shout to stfu, even made counter “egh egh egh ooh ooh ooh” noises! But they didnt seem to care. Luckily the for sale board went up and no doubt some poor unsuspecting person has them as neighbours now (?maybe its you!). I did wonder if she made those obviously performative noises just to make him finish quicker 🤭

Jimcraic · 10/10/2025 21:57

I think the note is likely to have amused them and they'll either be slightly less loud next time or invite you to join, either way it's a win

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