To be irritated about school swimming attire rules 'for girls'?

[BeFairSloth]

DD (10yo) does swimming lessons at school. The rules are that girls must wear a one piece swimming costume and we have of course adhered to the rules and purchased one specifically for these lessons.

DD is starting to get to the age where she's a bit more self-conscious of her own body and at home, prefers a tankini which has short-like bottoms and a full length tight (i.e. not flapping about everywhere) top. We encourage body confidence where we can, but I also want her to feel comfortable and confident in what she wears. I therefore asked whether her preferred tankini would be acceptable for lessons and was told no, girls must wear a one-piece.

On the other hand the boys all wear swim shorts and a few of them wear swim shorts with swim tops - the UV type ones.

I assume they're worried about a 'slippery slope' or girls starting to wear bikinis if they allow a full coverage tankini, but what is offensive about a girl's belly button, when most of the boys have their belly buttons out and some of them are even wearing two pieces?

I realise this is a small problem in the grand scheme of things, but it has left me (quietly, in my own home) quite irritated at the double standards. AIBU?

Swim club mum here. It is entirely normal for the girls to go through a "I want a legsuit" phase for training.

You can get cheap ones.

I wouldn't encourage split suits for teen girls if they need to dive or jump in!

I always wear bikinis at swimming pools, I have huge boobs and they are better off hoiked up in a supportive bra style bikini top. Not like those triangle bikinis but if that’s what someone wants to wear (not in school swimming lessons) then why not?

I’ve worn a swimsuit with integrated shorts for years. It means I don’t have to worry about my bikini line. They’re easy to get hold of and would solve the problem.

Can she not wear a one-piece as required?

My daughter’s school lets them wear the shorts over the swimming costume. Ask and see if they allow it.

Surely you've answered your own question though. It is quite obvious that some parents will send their children with inappropriately small bikinis. The simplest solution is to direct girls to wear a one-piece. It is very clear what is permitted and therefore very easy for school to enforce.

Don't be irritated at the school, be irritated at the previous parents that sent their kids to school swimming lessons with inappropriate swimwear choices.

You can get a one piece with shorts like this:https://www.sportsdirect.com/slazenger-lycra-xtra-life-boyleg-swimsuit-ladies-354743?cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=22038631632&cq_term=&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&cq_plt=gp&cq_con=&cq_med=pla&cq_pos=&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiA5pq-BhBuEiwAvkzVZe5kf6LIbvYoe1H5-lW9MJXt3MrvNXyb1wK9HA9I5hVsjuIMwjksxRoCI2IQAvD_BwE#colcode=35474322

The reason the schools don't allow a two piece, even a tankini, is because they can ride up if you jump/dive in.

Tbf the one pieces can be just as inappropriate, too small , too big or the worst one was one that became see through when wet.

They ride up though, especially when jumping in or diving.

Put the tankini shorts over the one piece...

jeez

Not the point of the thread but why do some pools not allow rash vests?

a) one pieces are better for proper swimming because they are more slim-line in the water.
b) school are trying to get 30 kids changed through a lesson and out, without anyone drowning and without making the next class of swimmers late or being late for their own coach.
They don't need to be worried about whether what the girls are wearing is appropriate because any of the rules are open to interpretation. If proper full one-piece costumes are ok for women competing in mixed arenas, they are fine for school girls.

Plus of course, you could just get her a one piece with shorts....

I bet they wouldn't say anything if she turned up in a tankini though would they

So true

So hard to find costumes that fit for some people

They will be active- jumping in, diving to the bottom etc.

bikinis and tankini’s risk riding up, falling down or otherwise coming unstuck. They just aren’t adequate for lessons. Boys shorts/speedos are better designed to stay put.

i never wear a bikini as it’s just not practical if you want to actually swim or be active in the water.

If you'd sent her with it and it has no gap then I bet no one would have noticed

Yeah same, I've never found a one piece that actually fits and supports my boobs as it should

They should just say no bikini or crop tops, but swim leggings and or baggy swim shorts, plus stomach length swim vest should be acceptable for both sexes.

I remember hating swimming and getting changed in front of everyone. I deliberately left my kit at home and the teacher forced me to wear a costume about five sizes too small. I was an adult size 14 and this was a children's suit.
Mortifying. I didn't swim again fur about ten years!

I wear a tankini with shorts and a long top (Lands End). I am tall and well fitting one piece suits are often hard to find.
It pretty much looks like a boy leg one piece.
It's much more practical on holiday if we're doing active water sports.
I honestly can't see how this would be a problem for school swim lessons.
They just need to state that the top needs to be like a one piece, NOT a bikini or crop top.

My tankini top has never ridden up, or my short fallen down when I'm doing water sports. Because it fits me. I've come a cropper in a bikini top (mainly cos I have very small boobs that don't really warrant a bikini top!

My Dd is the same and wears a short wetsuit. It's like a T-shirt and shorts all in one.

Surely it will make her feel more self conscious if she’s the only girl in different swimwear?

I’m a firm stickler for rules, but also wouldn’t want my daughter to feel uncomfortable. How much swimming is she doing at school? Is there any flex to work with the school to offer a slightly different style to accommodate girls who are more anxious about this?

There's always one