Dh drank a whole bottle of whiskey

[howyoufeeling]

Seriously a whole bottle of Jameson.
Now dh is a good bloke, works his ass off in his own company, hands on dad, looks after us the best he can. He's got SADS, does every winter. He's upped his sertraline as recommended so waiting for that to take effect.
I took the little ones to bed last night and slept all night with them, he drank a whole bottle of whiskey. He didn't cause any trouble or anything you might expect from someone drinking that amount, wasn't sick or anything but couldn't get into bed as his head was spinning so slept downstairs. I've come down this morning and the whole bottle is gone.
Aibu or will this not fuck his liver ?! He's currently in bed dying, has work in a bit. Can't help but feel a little smug and so fucking grateful I don't feel how he does !!

Oh OP, this is absolutely a problem, it seems that your tolerance for alcohol is just so high that you can't see it. A bottle of whiskey over the weekend is an insane amount of alcohol units and unless he doesn't drive at all over the weekend or on Mondays then he's surely going to be over the limit, despite him being over 6 foot.

I don't drink alcohol at all, so I'm not coming from this as someone who drinks a few bottles of wine a week, I think that's a problem too.

Best of luck tackling this, as you'll know, alcohol is a massive depressant and will be making him feel so much worse. I imagine if he was honest about his alcohol usage at the GP they'd be referring him to services too but people tend to play it down, as deep down they know its a problem but they aren't ready to admit it yet. X

I mean it's not really helpful people debating on here whether or not they would give him that label.

He has mental health problems and needs to seek help, either way.

perhaps it isn’t any of your business what people spend their money on
whether it ruins them financially or not it really shouldn’t be your concern

my grandparents were richits true with a Med lifestyle earned through creativity,
judicious investments, luck! and if they wanted wine they would not have
sought your aPproval permission or countenanced your judgemental shrieking

the OP will go away now and chew on the responses here, carry on with
her life

my grandparents are long gone as is the house in Lombardy, wine merchants account and the family silver, however their love of a glass of good wine lingers…

what on earh are you on about?
Are you confusing me with somebody else?
My only comment on this thread ( apart from to you) has been in response to the person who saud her mother drank 3 boxes of wine and a bottle of gin a day and I asked whether they could afford that?. ( I'm not sure if you are aware but that is far more than most people drink an is a very expensive lifestyle)

I'm intrigued as to where I was demonstrating judgemental shrieking if you would be so kind as to point that out

alcoholics hide, even removing floorboards, this will not work
my neighbour who shops online has a different supermarket
every five weeks so she can order gin and it not show up on
her ‘usuals’ when she shops - alcoholics are sneaky, self deluding
and will say, I don’t have a problem, then driving you to hospital
eg, cannot find the ignition with the ignition key -
functioning alcoholics, driving on motorways, with children or baby
in the car, pregnant wife, flask bottle under the driver’s seat

you repeated the exercise neatly proving my point

The only person to have mentioned your grandparents is you ( and a slightly odd need to reiterate they are wealthy,
Again, have you confused me with somebody else as you don't make sense

nope, sorry.
You're either a bit batshit crazy or really poor at writng as I don't uderstand still!

Where was my judgemental shrieking please?

AI overview.

Mixing alcohol with sertraline (Zoloft) can lower your tolerance to alcohol, which can lead to dangerous consequences.

How does sertraline affect alcohol tolerance?

Decreased tolerance
Sertraline can counteract the effects of alcohol, which means you need to drink more alcohol to feel the same effect.
Increased cravings
Sertraline increases serotonin release, while alcohol increases dopamine release. This can reinforce the behavior of mixing the two substances.
What are the risks of mixing alcohol and sertraline?
Severe dizziness: The combination can intensify the effects on the nervous system.

Drowsiness: This can lead to impaired judgment, poor motor skills, and slow reaction times.

Blackouts and alcohol poisoning: Drinking more alcohol to feel the same effect can lead to blackouts and alcohol poisoning.

Heart failure and death: The combination of both can cause heart failure and death.

What should I do?
If you're taking sertraline, it's best to avoid drinking alcohol. If you do decide to drink, do so with caution, and stop consuming alcohol if any adverse effects develop.

"however their love of a glass of good wine lingers…"

A love that has been passed down to subsequent generations from the looks of things 😁

You sound co-dependent.

A whole bottle of whiskey in one night would kill me - and I can hold my beer.

You’re definitely not stupid! You must have had such a shock when you realised the whisky bottle was completely empty.

Will your DH listen to you if you ask him to stop drinking so much because you’re worried about him? A bottle of whisky every weekend is far too much.

What do you mean I sound co-dependent?

@Smokesandeats Thanks. Yep deffo a shock !
I've already spoken to him and said he's drinking too much and needs to stop. He has agreed and does have insight and knows he's using it to self medicate. He's going to pick up his running again, so when that urge comes he's going to focus any pent up frustration into exercise which is obviously the right thing to do and by far the best thing any of us can do to battle mental health issues.

Oh the places I would find empty bottles, they were everywhere! I can still remember going in to the basement, ironically to start packing our stuff away as we could no longer afford the rent (we were living abroad at the time) and were having to move back to the UK because he’d got fired (for being drunk at work one too many times) and while digging out our things I came across dozens and dozens of empty bottles of wine. The shock was such that I sat on the floor and cried my eyes out. It was a horrible sight to behold, a sea of empty bottles. It actually makes me feel sick to think about it even though it was twenty odd years ago.

I would do this. His reaction to there being no alcohol should tell you a lot. I wouldn’t even tell him there’s no alcohol, let it just be and see how that pans out.

How can he work effectively after downing a half/whole bottle of whiskey. That's very different to polishing off a bottle of wine. Would you let him put the children to bed and help them have a bath after he had drunk that much?

How much parenting does he do? What sort of life is he having if he has to work every day?

If he drives, there must be times at a weekend when he his driving over the limit.

perhaps it isn’t any of your business what people spend their money on
whether it ruins them financially or not it really shouldn’t be your conceRn
You do know this is a discussion forum right? So while on a personal level it wouldn’t be any of her concern, the reality is that alcoholics often have families, who then become victims of that level of spending on account of the alcoholic’s spending.

As for the rest, sounds like you’ve been enjoying a glass or ten yourself 😂

Will you be happy if he turns up with a bottle of whiskey on Friday as that is when he usually drinks @howyoufeeling

That sounds like a good result. Just remember that if he can’t manage to cut down or stop on his own, there’s no shame in asking for help.

Can I ask out of interest why on earth such an addictive substance like alcohol is still legally for sale ? When we look at drugs, weed, class A's which are all illegal why is alcohol not ? It is so damaging, physically and socially yet we can go to the pub and buy it, the shops etc

Sorry to hear you've had to walk a similar path.

After I left, he fell off a cliff - it was me who kept life vaguely on track, as in adhering to a work schedule, ensuring bills paid, meals cooked, etc. Once that fell away (and he'd also lost his job due to drinking), any semblance of order and routine were lost, and he just ate and drank himself quickly up to 22 stone, and now has chronic respiratory and probably a whole host of other health issues in the mix too.

He has not stopped drinking - and swings between acknowledging it as a problem, and spouting the narrative that I just wasn't understanding enough about his mental health issues.

To be clear I decidedly did NOT leave him due to depression / anxiety / insomnia - I supported him with those for years. I left because his means of self-medication (alcohol and sleeping tablets) went on to take on a life of its own, ultimately coming to dwarf the problems he'd been originally trying to solve. I left because he was crashing his car drunk, losing his job, near miss setting fire to the flat on several occasions and just so so so much more lower level stuff I can't possibly list out here - all the while swearing blind he didn't have a problem.

He was - and probably always will be - the love of my life, and it's just so fucking sad.

OP - any of this chiming with you?

Recommend you read Drink by Professor David Nutt, where this very question is posed.

Sorry but that’s rubbish. How can you say that someone who gets through 2-3 bottles a week has a drink problem. Really? 🤔

I don’t believe it’s actually possible to drink a whole bottle of whisky like that and not already be a problem drinker. His liver will be under massive stress. He may be a functioning alcoholic, or even capable of stopping, but as it stands, the half a bottle he was drinking every weekend was already killing him. Given the high and growing levels of liver disease and early deaths linked to alcohol abuse, it’s pointless pretending that lots of other people drink like this, so must be OK. He has to find better ways of dealing with his mood disorders than pills and alcohol, and very soon. A trip to the GP for a blood test to get an indication of the current level of damage would be a good start - might give him an incentive not to keep falling off the wagon every weekend.