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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Being locked in?

257 replies

DazedandConfusedbyPolitics · 18/02/2025 21:20

New house to us, so please bear with me. DH nipping out the back door and conservatory so he can smoke a Marlboro in the back garden. He locks both doors behind him because he doesn't want dogs to follow. Fair enough, garden is not completely secure yet. He leaves keys in doors so I'm locked in with dogs and I feel trapped. I can't get out unless he turns or removes keys. AIBU to ask him to remove the keys so I can leave when I want?

OP posts:
BlondiePortz · 18/02/2025 21:20

You dont have a front door?

Porkyporkchop · 18/02/2025 21:21

Surely you have a front door ?

DazedandConfusedbyPolitics · 18/02/2025 21:22

BlondiePortz · 18/02/2025 21:20

You dont have a front door?

New to us house. One key that isn't in the door anymore.

OP posts:
steff13 · 18/02/2025 21:23

Do you have a front door? Assuming it only takes a few minutes to smoke a cigarette, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal. Do you have a phobia?

I'm not familiar with these kinds of doors that have to be locked and unlocked with a key on both sides because that's not typical here. Could you get knobs where you have a latch to lock from the inside and a key from the outside, so that you can open it from both sides?

2025willbemytime · 18/02/2025 21:23

Lock him out. Or maybe just shut the door..

EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness · 18/02/2025 21:23

Do the doors nor stay closed unless locked? Otherwise no need to lock them and if they do why is he leaving the keys in them which renders them unusable. There's no justification for not just locking them and putting the keys in his pocket so then you can get out too. Not a big ask, why does he leave keys in the doors?

saraclara · 18/02/2025 21:23

Of course you aren't unreasonable. That would freak me out. Why do the doors need locking? Are your dogs able to turn the handle or something?

HundredMilesAnHour · 18/02/2025 21:24

DazedandConfusedbyPolitics · 18/02/2025 21:22

New to us house. One key that isn't in the door anymore.

Your answer makes zero sense. Do you have a front door or not? Surely no matter how newly you moved in, you noticed if you came in through a front door?

Needanewnameidea · 18/02/2025 21:25

Front door or not, he should remove the key from the lock, surely you just ask him to do that and he agrees?! And then you quickly get the front door lock changed as well, because you need a functioning front door and a second exit in case of fire.

Are you scared of him/is there more to this, because this would be a two second conversation in my household, not a dilemma?

BlondiePortz · 18/02/2025 21:25

So why hasnt anyone arrange more keys?

steff13 · 18/02/2025 21:25

This kind of knob is what I was talking about. I don't know if I explained it very well.

Being locked in?
Greenqueen40 · 18/02/2025 21:25

How long does it take to smoke 1 cigarette??!! Surely you can manage that!

Stichintime · 18/02/2025 21:27

I'm a bit baffled, but I'm sure it makes sense to you. You're either get used to it or come up with a solution. I wouldn't like being locked in either.

Whaleandsnail6 · 18/02/2025 21:28

Is this just for the couple of minutes it takes to have a cigarette?

If it is then I think its a none issue... why do you feel trapped?

Surely he could hear you knocking on the window if you wanted to get out during the time he's outside?

Shallana · 18/02/2025 21:31

Why can you not use the front door? Why does he need to lock the back doors instead of just closing them over?

CaptainFuture · 18/02/2025 21:31

Whaleandsnail6 · 18/02/2025 21:28

Is this just for the couple of minutes it takes to have a cigarette?

If it is then I think its a none issue... why do you feel trapped?

Surely he could hear you knocking on the window if you wanted to get out during the time he's outside?

This, you are in the house, he goes into back garden to smoke and shuts door and locks it then comes back in? Why no front door? Surely if you need out he'll unlock?!

Poppyseeds79 · 18/02/2025 21:32

Sounds absolutely batshit

Bloom15 · 18/02/2025 21:33

That wouldn't bother me - surely only a few minutes

GermanBite · 18/02/2025 21:34

He locks two doors behind him to keep the dogs in?

SeriouslyStressed · 18/02/2025 21:36

Are you saying that he uses the keyring that has the only front door key on it to lock the doors on his way out?

And that the front door is locked?

And that your dogs can open doors that are not locked?

Can't you just get a dog/stair gate across one of the doors to the rear?

DazedandConfusedbyPolitics · 18/02/2025 21:37

HundredMilesAnHour · 18/02/2025 21:24

Your answer makes zero sense. Do you have a front door or not? Surely no matter how newly you moved in, you noticed if you came in through a front door?

Edited

We have a front door that is locked. Previous owner took the only(?) key and DH sees no reason to change that lock as it only leads to a porch door that has new locks "so no-one can get in". Fair enough, but when he's off smoking and locking back doors I (and dogs) can't get out of the house.

OP posts:
BlondiePortz · 18/02/2025 21:38

So what if there is a fire, none of this makes any sense

Laiste · 18/02/2025 21:38

Go out tomorrow and get another key cut?

A lot of tesco stores have a Timsons in them now or google one on the high st. Takes about 2 mins.

But i have to ask, why is he having to actually lock the door because of the dogs not just shut it? Confused

Ellie1015 · 18/02/2025 21:38

It is for 5 mins work around tonight by either you tolerating it, or him coordinating for you to lock him out and let him back in. Get a new key cut would be first job tomorrow to make it more convenient.

Fraaances · 18/02/2025 21:38

The obvious solution is to get some extra keys cut.