To leave my 15 &11month child overnight

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I booked tickets for me and DH to go to see comedy in a city two hour from home. The plan was for my 2DC to stay at my MILs, however my DCs don't want to stay and have asked to be left at home overnight, tickets and hotel non refundable. Our eldest will be 15 and 11months and the younger 14. They get on really well and are both sensible.

The neighbours will be there if the DCs need them, we act as back up if either couple has an evening out.

My DH feels leaving them would be fine, but I'm a bit anxious about it.

YANBU - just go, the DC could leave home in a month.
YABU - cancel and stay at home you'll have to wait for the next opportunity once DC is 16.

https://www.gov.uk/law-on-leaving-your-child-home-alone

I didn't say at night I said overnight and under 16

And the first thing it says is thst there is no age a child cant be left at home alone
It says the NSPCC says a child UNDER 16 should not be left overnight but this is guidance not the law and I'm sure even they realise the situation is nuanced
It's very different leaving a child four weeks off the 16th birthday on their own overnight and a five year-old.

You clearly didn't read what I put apart from I put 17 instead of 16 by mistake

It's still guidance from the nspcc not the law.

No, they’re children and too young to deal with anything unexpected that could happen. You’ve arranged for them to stay with a grandparent - why are you allowing them to negotiate?

From the title I thought it was a 15 year old and an 11 month old. A nearly 16 year old (and the 14 year old) should be fine? Not sure what the problem is.

Your link says there is no law, it's just a recommendation.

Her eldest is almost 16. It's absolutely fine.

@Ihavenopatienceforthis

why on earth would a 16 year old need a babysitter??

I think they are old enough, but I would be worried about the temptation to have friends over…
id perhaps be inclined to have a baby sitter- someone in the house til midnight. with the expectation that your kids are asleep before then.

We had some pretty insane parties at 15 in my friends parents houses when they were away. For this reason I won't be letting my kids stay alone at that age. But depends on the children :)

Tell them they are doing as they're told!

I probably would, at that age and if they are sensible and get on well tigether

Sorry but just TELL them they are going to Grannies like it or not it is ONE night. We'll have to do things we don't want that's life.

No chance it would be party central. I would go to show then come home

Tbh I’d be telling them they are going to GP. They are still children and should be doing as they are told

Well yes, this. They need to suck it up.

Times have massively changed. At 16 (Just started college) My mum went away for the weekend abroad with her friends and left me in charge of my 11 year old brother. Granted I was very mature for my age, but how will you ever know you can trust your children if you don't give them the opportunity to show you they can be trusted.

Equally, asking opinions on here won't give you the answer you're looking for. You ultimately have to decide and the fact you're feeling anxious about it already just shows that even if you did allow it, you'd not settle all evening/night and waste your night away.

Perhaps do a trial run, if that's possible and stay out till early hours and see how they felt getting themselves settled for bed and 'closing' the house down for the night etc?

It's tricky and I totally understand your worries about it, but there always needs to be a first time, right?

It’s only 2 hours from home, I would go but return after the gig, I wouldn’t leave them overnight.

I don't see why this is even a question. Of course you leave them. My DS is 7 and although I woukdnt dream of actually leaving him overnight I am confident that he would be fine. He can make his own dinner (ham sandwich, crisps and an apple or banana) , drinks, breakfast (toast, crumpets or croissants). Knows what number the shower needs to be on for him. Knows how to turn the heating on and off and knows how to call his grandma/emergency services.

Sorry just saw original plan is go to GP - they should do that. Why should you have any worries in your background or forfeit your night away because they are pushing boundaries? Nope.

Why do they get to dictate the situation - you’ve made plans based on them staying with MIL, it’s one night.

It’s a lot to ask a 15 year old to be responsible for locking up and switching EVERYTHING off at night, dealing with a power cut, burst water pipes, fire, and be responsible for making sure a younger sibling stays within the rules! We left one child at home when 16 and 6 months old (eldest boy) for 2 nights coming up to their GCSEs, another at 17 & 6 months (girl) for 4 nights for same reason for the first time, but not /never to be responsible for younger siblings, nor with the possibility of parties etc. The girl was also able to drive in case of issues.

We left ours at that age for 2 nights, GPs round the corner. They were fine. We were 1.5 hrs away so not too far really. We also are close to our neighbours who were home to help if need be.

Nope! Totally irresponsible to leave them, no matter how sensible you might think they are. Anything unforeseen could happen

I would give them the choice of come with us and stay in a hotel room together next to us, or go to mil.