Being naked in front of DP/DH

[SnowflakeSmasher86]

Are you comfortable being visibly naked in front of your partner? Would you be ok with the lights on/daylight etc and walk around with nothing on?

Or would you have a towel/underwear/a sheet over you?

i’m not bothered about my wobbly bits on a daily basis, and felt just the same way when I was several stone lighter, so I don’t see it as a body image thing as such, I juat wouldn’t walk around naked in front of him. He thinks this says something fundamental about our relationship.

YABU - I think its normal to feel 100% at ease walking about naked in front of my DP/DH

YANBU - I’d rather keep some things undercover and feel self conscious naked standing up and walking about the bedroom/house.

I find some of the comments on here really sad. Yes it would be lovely if you felt happy and comfortable enough around your partner to skip around totally nude. But you aren't doing something wrong if you aren't, forcing your self to do something that makes you uncomfortable because other people think it is normal is not OK.
I guess my question would you feel the same alone or around other people/previous partners? As I wouldn't want to be naked around someone who had criticised me either, whereas if I was totally comfortable and felt safe and appreciated I imagine I could get used to it. So if the way he makes you feel is causing it then this is on him. Not you!
But equally it's OK to tell him this is just who you are and doesn't reflect on your relationship with him.

Most people are not even remotely traumatised by seeing a parent naked as young kids.

I wouldn’t care if I saw my mother naked now, and I’m 49. I certainly didn’t care when I was a little kid! I used to go and chat to her while she was having a bath when I was a kid.

Given that men and boys literally whip their dicks out to piss next to complete strangers in public loos, and strip naked in changing rooms when they play team sports etc, I doubt any lad is going to be traumatised by seeing his own dad’s nob.

Me and dp ages 37 and 41 been together 8 and a half years we still walk about naked in front of each other without concern

I agree.

I find people who feel "traumatised" by seeing naked bodies are those who have been made to feel that their bodies are shameful. People with healthy senses of self and healthy mental views on bodies just see a naked body as a naked boy - nothing to comment on, nothing to concern themselves with.

I grew up with naked parents and I'm certainly not traumatised. My children are growing up in a similar environment. I don't force my nudity on them, but they'll happily chat to me when I'm in the shower or bath, or wander in to our bedroom whilst we're changing etc.

*I'm obviously talking about appropriate nudity e.g in communal changing rooms where people are simply just getting changed, a child walking in to a bathroom whilst a parent showers or changes etc.

While I agree with the essence of what you are saying, I feel I must point out the error in your assumption that men and boys see each other's dicks in public loos.

It doesn’t happen.

If my kids are so traumatised by seeing my naked body then why on earth can I not get a minutes peace to myself in the bath?? One or the other is always coming in or out or sitting on the loo for a chat.

Teach them about privacy and respect for others, not to mention resilience and self-sufficiency, by locking the bathroom door ffs. Do they have zero consideration and impulse control??

We don't all share your shame. It's unfortunate that you find yourself so disgusting, but that's not something you should be encouraging others to feel.

Wanting to use the bathroom in private has zero to do with shame.

Hm. It does when you take it to the extreme of locking children out of the bathroom in case they dare try and come in for a friendly chat.

It makes me realise how lucky I was brought up to be relaxed about this kind of thing when I read stuff like this. My mum never once made me feel like there was any reason to be embarrassed or ashamed of my body - she saved me a lot of potential anguish.

Totally normal. DH & I are naked in front of each other on the daily. I'm 7 months postpartum & exclusively BF at with moment with all stretchmarks and wobbly bits that go with it but it would never occur to me to cover up.

I couldn’t care less who sees me naked. I think a lot of the issues cited here depends on upbringing. I was one of 2 sisters with mum and dad. Mum (now passed away) used to go topless at the beach. She taught us that there was nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about bodies beware of bad people.

I was UK born but brought up in France due to dad’s job. It was quite common in loos for women to walk past urinals with a number of men standing together, having a wee to get the ladies’ cubicles and, for some reason, a pay phone (pre mobile days).

There are fewer such setups in France today, but they are still there, including some older bars and restaurants. Attitudes are more relaxed.

I don’t walk round naked when I’m home alone so wouldn’t do it in front of anyone

I agree that upbringing might play a part, lots of sisters but my parents or family weren’t ever naked around us so we haven’t been either, private parts are private and the most they see is us in a swimming costume. Bath time or shower time (and toilet time) for adults is definitely private, as a SAHM it was my only 10 mins peace sometimes so sacred and not to be interrupted! The girls are obviously comfortable being naked though as children but if their Dad suddenly started walking round starkers now they would be shocked! I didn’t realise this was a controversial setup until I read all the comments on here

I'm definitely too embarrassed to amble about naked in front of anyone but somehow have produced two daughters who will happily amble about naked in front of friends, boyfriends and probably the postman.

Due to what could be described as a minor mishap l showed my postman the lot a couple of years back 🫢.

Given that I, as a woman, have caught an occasional glimpse of someone’s cock when having to walk past men weeing, I’m pretty sure plenty of men have too. I’m not saying they all have a good old look, obviously. But pissing in a urinal in a row of other men is really not a private business.

But what did you do when your dc ( if you have any) were tiny toddlers. I just brought them in to the bathroom with me when I showered or when to the loo. I'd bring in a toy and they would sit on a bath mat and play whilst I did my business

I have a lifetime’s experience of using male public toilets. There is a strict etiquette involved that you, as a woman, may not be aware of. Men focus on what they are doing. They don’t “catch glimpses” of other men’s cocks.

Quite.

In a row of three, never use the middle one. Eyes forward and down.

I've walked past many a man's toilets and the festival open air urinals and I have never caught a glimpse of cock. You have to at least be looking in the general direction. I know where men keep them so I don't look.

and @ ItGhoul

I think it's different when you are in the bath or using the toilet (re: men and boys), but prancing walking around the house and cooking whilst naked is a totally different level!
I know my dc hated going into the changing rooms with is dad because he did not want to see the men there naked.

I agree with you, if it's a normal thing for your own family, who are others to say it's traumatising?... they are being small-minded and ridiculous.

My son was used to seeing me and DH naked, and we him till he left home at 18.
The bath and toilet were combined, so if one of us were having a bath and the other wanted a quick pee....no problem.
We always knocked on bedroom doors, but if one person was naked, it wasn't a big deal.
There was no secrecy to nudity...which worked fine when abroad on foreign beaches, son was not one of those kids who gawped at topless women, he was used to it.

• with his dad (typo)

We will have to agree to disagree on this one. Each to their own!

You can't get a minute's peace in the bath because you haven't trained them about privacy and respecting a closed door.