Our house is smallish and homely.
We haven't hosted parties in our house since our children were mid teens.
Instead we've always given them money to go away with a few friends or a big night out in a city.
Dd moved back home after being at university, living in London and working in hospitality to go on holidays and visit friends.
She has a history of mental health issues and was very ill in her teens, she knows we do everything we can to help support her and alleviate her problems.
She's not happy here, we've made a lot of adjustments to try and make her feel comfortable and prevent her MH problems escalating.
She works part time in a local bar, is looking for more work but can't afford to move out yet.
She is turning 23 soon and wants to invite around 10-15 people over for a party.
I did say a tentative yes but also offered her money to go to London for a night out with a couple of friends instead which I thought she'd prefer.
She told me last night not all her friends could do that so she wants the party. She said she would feel sad on her birthday if she wasn't surrounded by all her friends.
So she said she will have the gathering here, move furniture, remove breakables and move the rug in the main room so she can relax without worrying and having anxiety.
I was caught off guard a bit so said I'd think about it but she got mad at me saying I'd already agreed.
My DH says people at 23 don't have parties in their parents houses, but I feel it could set off her depression and I worry about her becoming very ill with it again.
Are we being unreasonable not wanting to host a party for her?